What happens when you die and your child doesn't understand death? What if they just think you walked away?

That's where this conversation ended up. It started with a story about a mum who overheard a dad talking about his autistic son and accused him of saying his life was harder than hers. It turned into something neither Gaz nor Andy were prepared for. Pre-recorded death videos. Whether your child needs to see your body. The arithmetic of outliving someone who might never understand why you're not there anymore.

They also talk about why parents of high-functioning autistic children are often fighting the system harder than anyone else, why dads stop telling their mates anything, and what happens when you've been in combat mode so long you can't switch it off.

Plus: the Guardian photoshoot, the London Marathon in two weeks, a game-changing app for SEND parents landing in the UK, and Sean ran another half marathon for fun.

0:00 — Back from Cyprus, the Guardian photoshoot4:23 — The pronoun conversation follow-up5:37 — The dad who stopped telling his mates7:21 — The mum who switched9:39 — The "top trumps" problem in the community13:47 — Luke's story: when your child can't live with you16:04 — What happens when I die?17:33 — The pre-recorded death video18:40 — Love on the Spectrum and the parents who can't grow old22:30 — Everyone's struggles are relative27:51 — The system was worse 30 years ago34:24 — The Discord and epic fails43:16 — The app that's going to change things45:29 — London Marathon and Ambitious About Autism50:22 — Why we're terrible at replying to messages

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