.

Table of nonsense:

2:50 - What pisses John off

5:30 – The concept of hibernation befuddles chris’s brain

7:30 –  More stuff that pisses John off

10:00 – Guest Caller: “Cuntie” our resident rage analyst

11:00   John’s foodcart fiasco

14:20- Cuntie’s crosswalk conundrum

21:55 – Chris’s Sesame chicken shitshow

32:00 - Chris’s Pork Bone Assault

41:30 - John almost gets stabbed in the sinus

54:17 – RAGEFUL SONG: “Shadow Factory” by JELLi (Chris Sauter) 

Table of nonsense:

4:35- Chris ponders breast implants and wonder if they can move around the body and get lost in the skin

7:30- Chris almost gets beat up by a stranger twice.

8:50 – if ISIS opened up an Ices shop, what would their ice cream flavors be

20:40 - chris is going to reduce his perceived homosexuality in the new year by doing pullups

29:00 - The breaking point of rage and how chris threw a lawn chair at someone

34:00 - Chris’s pathetic fist clench that will get his knuckles broken

35:30- The breaking point of rage and how John followed someone to their car to fight them

40:00- John puts pigtails in his hair and wears a shirt that says “I love john matland” to piss off two Guido tool bags

42:45-   Chris cannot, for the life of him, remember to zip his fly

43:25 - John solves the mystery of why chris forgets to zip his fly

45:00- Chris defends why he chooses to pee sitting down

47:30- Chris’s penis is like a two headed dragon

53:49-   SONG: “Mistakes” by Native Daydream

Episode 7 Table of Contents:

0:00 - Abortion of an intro

2:10 - who is “John the Bum”

7:50 - john gets a shoe thrown at him in bed with a girl

9:00-  chris gets a banana thrown at him while losing virginity

10:15:  don’t hate the game, hate john matland

11:50   the secret sex society called the “non virgin club” that Chris believed actually existed

17:50-  aaaaand yet another woman thinks chris is gay

23:40 - chris and john drink way too much and get one sip away from alcohol poisoning 

26:30-  chris’s whole body is falling apart right now

29:33 - ghost attack PT 3

29:45 - chris’s dyslexic brain meltdown

31:15   fart rockets, hemorrhoid harry & squatty potties

33:30 – don’t ever push...

35:30 – the double standard with sex amongst men & women

37:00 -  if it’s not me, it’s alejandro

42:00 – bobby fasool, himschedi and mark bruny

43:55 - nature’s sexual balance 

45:10 -   the pokemon go avatars are too sexy

47:00 - let’s take a trip down the cartoon pornography rabbit hole

53:05 - john battles an evil witch over a parking spot and his amazon package

63:52 – SONGS: High school Chris does Feliz Navidad & Auld Lang Syne

Table of contents:

2:30-   John’s Sex Nightmare and interpretation of said sex nightmare

8:00 -   debate: if you’re having a very wild orgy and you accidentally participate in homosexual activity, does that make you gay. (with guest: TeeJay Martin) 

13:07 - is chris 2% gay?

20:05 - college chris learns about female ejaculation the hard way

22:15 - John’s condolences to pokemon community about Niantic Christmas Ex-Raid cancellations

22:50 – chris goes to college falls in love with a lesbian and joins a cult

27:15 – cult chris condemns his friend’s father to hell

31:40 - cult chris commits the lustful sin of masturbation and then wears all black to mourn his evil deed

32:15 - cult chris tries to cock block john to save his soul and john gets a message from god

36:05 – the story of the cult continues

40:45 – john meets cult members at chris's birthday party

42:05 - john makes plans to fight the congregation and rescue me from cult

43:40 – post cult: chris acclimates back to life in the real world and has a melt down in a porn shop

48:50 SONG: “When I joined the cult…” *MUST LISTEN* (with guest Billy Senko from Youth Moose) 

54:30-   Chris is not 2% gay, I repeat… not 2% gay. Billy weighs in on the debate

58:05 – SONG: The 12 Days of Christmas by Chris Sauter

Table of contents:

1:00 - new star wars movie (no spoilers)

2:45 - chris the defenseless princess

5:00 - chris falls through a fucking table

8:25 - chris can’t have sex dreams

13:00 - chris finally has a sex dream (almost)

21:17 - are you a relationship guy or a fuck boy

27:00 - john’s amazing makeout story

32:40 - john’s makeout to sex ratio

35:15 - people’s ego’s & relationships & masks we hide behind

42:45 - kids or no kids

47:10 - john gets hit with a tornado of shit

56:36 - john tears crypto currency a new asshole

59:30 - SONG- "Frosty The Snowman" by JELLi (Chris Sauter)

1:00 - Dunkin Donuts Pokemon Go accident

5:06 - Chris' stupid NYC mouth accident (Part 1)

9:10 - Chris' stupid NOLA mouth accident (Part 2)

21:45 -  Boring lap dances and awesome lap dances

28:28 - Chris almost has New Zealand anal sex

30:30 - John hosts lap dances for every woman in the bar

40:30 - If you have sex with John, he will record your consent to prove he's not a sexual predator.

43:20 - Chris explains why he has no swag. 

44:50 - Random streetwalker accuses John of being a sexual predator in Nashville.

57:35- Las Vegas hot tubs are comprised of 88% semen

63:10 - SONG: - "Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer" Chris high school punk rock cover. 

Two Bumbling Idiots are still on the scene.. stumbling..fumbling, and bumbling.

Table of Contents:

3:38 - New Segment: John places weekly call to instagram model Niece Waidhofer

6:30 - Prelude: People that suck

9:18 - Storytime: "Dog Shit Gate 2014"

27:30 - DP and buffalo wings

35:20 - Chris' first exposure to pornographic material

39:06 - John's custom tailored condoms

40:33 - John's sex-ed public service announcement

43:45 - Phantom F*#$ing

51:48 - Chris's embarassing story

56:34 - Song: "Linus & Lucy" from Chris' "A Jolly JELLi Christmas" EP

Two Bumbling Idiots are still on the scene.. stumbling..fumbling, and bumbling.

Table of Contents:

0:00: The intro that should never be

3:55: Fancy shawls and exotic underwear

7:50: Ghost attack PT. 2

9:45: Perverted Janitor

14:25: Gay Hawaiian firefighter wanted to slide down Chris's pole

15:40: The "Not Gay..ok?" song

19:00: Harvey Weinstein and his Hollywood molesters

22:10: John almost got blown by an old man

30:35: Which instasquirrel would Chris jack off to?

35:15: John attempts to FaceTime the Instagram model Niece Waidhofer

38:00: Chris's speedy urine fiasco

42:23: "Blumpkin" by Snowflake The Rap God

Two Bumbling Idiots have arrived on scene... Listen and enjoy.

Brief Table of Contents.

0:00m - 10:00m - BORNING INTRO about us.. episode gets 100x better after boring intro  

14m 08s Cavemen & Squirrel Brains & Insta Whores & Dick Pics

22m 00s Cavemen & Squirrel Conclusion

23m 14s Crocodile Quicksand Poison Ivy Island

24m 50s Ghost Attack

25m 43s John's Creative Dick Pics

33m 00s John's Hypochondria of STD's

38m 19s John Tinder Fail

42m 47s Chris Spills Water All Over The Studio

44m 28s Chris OK Cupid Fail

54m 15  SONG: "I don't trust those gumballs" by Youth Moose