Table of Nonsense:

Intro:  Inglorious Bastards

3:25 - Gook in the pop filter

4:00 -  John makes out with a girl in new orleans...  or does he. 

9:00 -  Hotdog Santa Clause

10:26 -  John reminisces about how many women he's made out with, and wonders.. if any of them were actually dudes. 

13:30 - The colossal risks of riding a mechanical bull. 

15:00 -   Staten Island doesn't actually suck,  despite all you've been lead to believe. 

20:50 -  John saves a snapping turtle with a racist 

27:40 -  Conclusion -   every town, city and state,  has garbage.  No matter what. 

29:25 -  Ghost attack 6

31:00 -  The parking wars of Staten Island

39:40 -   Christopher's reformed driving practices, and his tango with the late great state of Virginia. 

44:40 -  Public service announcement:   NEVER DRIVE OVER 80MPH IN VIRGINIA.   NEVER. 

48:23 -  Rearview mirror coffee smash man

49:40 - John's ultimate solution to beat the parking nazi's

50:20 -  Chris is triggered by the sex on the screen

50:55 -  John's favorite road rage story that chris was there for but can't remember

52:00 - Christopher's amazing credit and how he was punished for being responsible

56:40 - Naked sleeping and all it's glory

61:00 -  SINGING -  We butcher "Ragoo" by Kings of Leon

Table of Nonsense:

Intro: Scary Movie 1

3:00-  John tries to call Niece Waidhofer...  AGAIN

4:10 - John meets dominican 8 year old whore baby

9:15 - John's Magnificent Beard

11:20- Chris's Magnificent Bush

12:00- (Interlude) John sings a Borrat song

22:35 - Chris's X's tells her family about his bush

23:45 - Ass Man or Boob Man

27:30 - Fully naked bodies aren't as sexy as half naked bodies

34:00 - John's solution to people farting on planes

36:20 - Chris doesn't use touch ID on his phone

38:50 - Walking Dead relationships

49:30 - How the past haunts us

53:30 - John's weird night

58:00 -  Chris & John howl out "hash pipe" by Weezer

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SPECIAL "NUCLEAR WINTER" game Episode featuring our Ragent & Gaygent - Cuntie & TJ, and John’s Princess Kristie.

instagram: @twobumblingidiots @_unknowinglee_

Table of Nonsense:

Intro: Superbad

0:45 -  Guest introduction:  Brooke Lyn Night. 

3:40 - Brooke's Book:  Moon Chaser: running from the sun

6:50 - Reading #1

9:45 - Retroactive Jealousy

11:45 - Chris's sexual prime was completely wasted. No sex from age 18 to 23.  6 entire years. 

18:20 - back to the book

22:30:  Reading #2

27:50:  Chris cold reading

28:50:  John cold reading

31:00 -  DID YOU FORGET JESUS?

34:30 - Rainbow Parties

37:00 -  Airdrop Assault

39:30 - Porn's desensitizing effects 

42:20 - Brooke’s big boobs got her bullied as a child

46:30-  Hype Beasts

51:40 - John has sex in the first grade (or so he thought)

58:55 - SONG - "Yogurt Hair" by Youth Moose

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Table of Nonsense:

Intro: Ace Ventura

2:50 - Yes, two 32 year old men can still have sleep overs

5:50 - Rave cruise girl grinds on a sleeping mans face and the double standard discussion begins

14:10 - Chris gives you his yawn

19:25 - 1 bumbing notebook question:

23:30- John almost gets into another fight

30:00 – John DOES get into another fight

44:50- CCD… Jesus Sunday school and john’s brawl with his parents

51:40 - SONG: “Sunburns” by JELLi (chris sauter)

Table of Nonsense:

Intro: Napoleon Dynamite

1:35 – if a tree falls in the woods, does it make a sound?

5:35 - Chris’s Pokemon glory

8:15 – Chris WHISTLES for the 2nd time in his life!

9:00 - MY SISTA LIVES HERE 

14:40 – john observes teenagers hitting on one another in the wild

18:50 - Chris’s official street meat recommendation

20:20 - Chris microwaves lettuce.. debate: is that gross?

25:30 - Cuntie clubs down another caveman

30:40 - The art of courting a woman has been obliterated by online dating

33:30 - Chris almost gets seduced by a cross-dressing grandma 

36:50 – Chris loves LIVE television because it gives him a sense of world community

38:20 - Chris’s Dawson’s creek confessions

42:15 - Every man has a “day of gay” 

42:15 – THE 45 MINUTE TIMER ACTUALLY WORKS FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER

44:00 - John started hitting on girls at age 6

49:15 - Chris’s first tongue kiss in the 5th grade

53:00 - We are not pedophiles… we swear…

53:55 – John’s first make out

57:30 -   @SHITOGRAPHY GOES PUBLIC

64:36 – SONG: “Greek Girls” by Snowflake the white rapper (John)

Table Of Nonsense: 

0:00 - Intro: Ghostbusters, and the intoxicated podcast that will never be. 

1:40:  2004 trip to the sex store results in fake vagina disaster at John's home

5:00:  chris has a chris moment and is afraid to offend amish people with a podcast they'll never listen to, on the internet they don't even know exists

9:40 - 2007 trip to costco for condoms results in Chris asking the stupidest questionn of his life 

12:20 -  Chris gives you his yawn

12:30 -  Rock hard cumdumpster sock can be used as a weapon

13:40 -  Chris's genius invention: "Jizz Jeans"

16:15 -  How to give your wife orgasms from the afterlife

17:45 -  John's Funeral: Burn me bitches

22:20 -  Chris literally says "FRUTATION" instead of "FRUITION" in a meeting at work. 

27:00 -  When a relationship is right, it's right.  Chris's relationship adivce. 

32:30 - John's tactic to disarm angry boyfriends

34:00 - John's strange cougar conundrum

36:55 - Chris doesn't understand exactly what "tits" are. 

42:00 -  Don't say "how was your day" too soon in a new encounter.  You will scare the person away unless they're just as into you as you are them. 

45:00 - John's family harasses him about his relationships

50:00 - Cuntie Apple Pay update..   the caveman comes back for more

51:00 - The New Orleans Uber ride that could have brutally ended our lives

59:00 - Pooping pants story

61:00 - Why doesn't Siri ever alert us that the 45 minute timer is up.. 

62:30 - SONG:  Snowflake "My First Gangsta Rap"

64:00 - SOLVED:  Why our timer never works.. (chris's fault)

Instagram:  @twobumblingidiots

Table of Nonsense:

0:00 - Intro -  Old School 

3:15 - John's Shanghai Sham Job

8:37 - Chris hates counterfeit merchandise

12:15 -  Once again john mistreats Siri and reduces his chances of receiving chris's imaginary apple kindness award 

13:20 -  Chris's Counterfeit stories:  Monster Turbine Pro Copper edition earbuds & Shure Beta 58a microphone

19:30 -  Chris spends $5500 on his dream microphone for his 30th birthday and gets SCAMMED. 

27:00 -  John's ebay blunder

30:20 - Amazon is plagued with counterfeit merchandise too

30:30 -  DEXTER:  Fuck that shitty ending.  Showtime ruined an amazing series. 

34:00 - Amazon sells Chris BOOTLEG Dexter DVD's

35:30 - Cuntie requests $9999 from a caveman and then proceeds to pretend she has a penis to scare him away. 

42:00 - Some kid in Chris's highschool science class used to staple his arm. Like, literally staple his arm. 

42:45 - John's middle school bully, and how it influenced him. 

50:00 - Immature middle school Chris gives up his rocker clothes for stupid old navy and starts listening to Jay-Z to be "cool".

55:00 - Chris gets slapped in highschool by a bully and realizes the meaning of life. 

58:55 - Bullies, although wastes of life and disrespectul towards all humans, CAN still serve a purpose. 

62:50 - PRANK CALL:  Mario Pt 2. 

65:50- SONG:  "The Gun Song"  (circa 2002)

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Table of Nonsense:

0:00 - Intro: True Lies

1:25 - Chris’s official Holiday cake recommendation

5:20 – Now introducing: Psychedelic Dave

6:20 - Emotionally Disturbed close encounters

9:45 - The frightening false alarm Hawaii received about impending doom

15:00-   Question of the hour – Kim Jong Un

18:00 – Tide pod challenge, cinnamon challenge, all these stupid challenges

21:50 – Chris thinks Apple is planning on giving out an award to people who have treated Siri with kindness instead of abusing her like John Matland

23:00 - Chris talks about how beautiful death is

28:30 – Chris talks about floating naked in outerspace in a sensory depravation chamber

32:00 -   The facemask people that walk around the city… explained!!!

36:00 - Chris experiments with Testicular Torsion

42:00 - John hooks up with a hot military lieutenant and mental explosions ensue

54:20 - PRANK PHONE CALL

58:53 - SONG:  "It's Not The End" by J.E.L.L.i.

Table of nonsense:

0:00-   intro - your last moments on earth

2:50-   john drops something into the toilet besides fecal matter 

4:15 - chris interrupts john’s story with a makeshift ASMR session

6:00 - john’s toilet bowl story continues... almost

7:05- nick interrupts john’s story with a call

9:15- ok, NOW john’s story continues until completion

12:40- chris almost cracks his tooth

13:40 - john’s master-ass wiping tips

15:50- Ghost Attack 3: mysterious jazz music

17:50 - chris’s questionable-ass shaving techniques

20:20 – john’s official bidet recommendation

22:50- the mechanics of poo-pourri evades chris’s comprehension

24:30 - girls never poop because they are celestial angels

28:00- Hollywood is pissing john off with Harvey Weinstein jerking off into flower pots

30:00 Aziz Ansari and James Franco 

33:20 - Time’s up movement 

44:05 – Ghost Attack 4 

45:45- Cuntie’s amazing caveman repellent system

47:30 - The story of the New Orleans palmetto bug freakout

62:18 – SONG: “The Tiny Cowboy” by Youth Moose