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Table of Nonsense:
Intro: Inglorious Bastards
3:25 - Gook in the pop filter
4:00 - John makes out with a girl in new orleans... or does he.
9:00 - Hotdog Santa Clause
10:26 - John reminisces about how many women he's made out with, and wonders.. if any of them were actually dudes.
13:30 - The colossal risks of riding a mechanical bull.
15:00 - Staten Island doesn't actually suck, despite all you've been lead to believe.
20:50 - John saves a snapping turtle with a racist
27:40 - Conclusion - every town, city and state, has garbage. No matter what.
29:25 - Ghost attack 6
31:00 - The parking wars of Staten Island
39:40 - Christopher's reformed driving practices, and his tango with the late great state of Virginia.
44:40 - Public service announcement: NEVER DRIVE OVER 80MPH IN VIRGINIA. NEVER.
48:23 - Rearview mirror coffee smash man
49:40 - John's ultimate solution to beat the parking nazi's
50:20 - Chris is triggered by the sex on the screen
50:55 - John's favorite road rage story that chris was there for but can't remember
52:00 - Christopher's amazing credit and how he was punished for being responsible
56:40 - Naked sleeping and all it's glory
61:00 - SINGING - We butcher "Ragoo" by Kings of Leon
Table of Nonsense:
Intro: Scary Movie 1
3:00- John tries to call Niece Waidhofer... AGAIN
4:10 - John meets dominican 8 year old whore baby
9:15 - John's Magnificent Beard
11:20- Chris's Magnificent Bush
12:00- (Interlude) John sings a Borrat song
22:35 - Chris's X's tells her family about his bush
23:45 - Ass Man or Boob Man
27:30 - Fully naked bodies aren't as sexy as half naked bodies
34:00 - John's solution to people farting on planes
36:20 - Chris doesn't use touch ID on his phone
38:50 - Walking Dead relationships
49:30 - How the past haunts us
53:30 - John's weird night
58:00 - Chris & John howl out "hash pipe" by Weezer
Insta: @twobumblingidiots
SPECIAL "NUCLEAR WINTER" game Episode featuring our Ragent & Gaygent - Cuntie & TJ, and John’s Princess Kristie.
instagram: @twobumblingidiots @_unknowinglee_
Table of Nonsense:
Intro: Superbad
0:45 - Guest introduction: Brooke Lyn Night.
3:40 - Brooke's Book: Moon Chaser: running from the sun
6:50 - Reading #1
9:45 - Retroactive Jealousy
11:45 - Chris's sexual prime was completely wasted. No sex from age 18 to 23. 6 entire years.
18:20 - back to the book
22:30: Reading #2
27:50: Chris cold reading
28:50: John cold reading
31:00 - DID YOU FORGET JESUS?
34:30 - Rainbow Parties
37:00 - Airdrop Assault
39:30 - Porn's desensitizing effects
42:20 - Brooke’s big boobs got her bullied as a child
46:30- Hype Beasts
51:40 - John has sex in the first grade (or so he thought)
58:55 - SONG - "Yogurt Hair" by Youth Moose
Instagram: @twobumblingidiots
Table of Nonsense:
Intro: Ace Ventura
2:50 - Yes, two 32 year old men can still have sleep overs
5:50 - Rave cruise girl grinds on a sleeping mans face and the double standard discussion begins
14:10 - Chris gives you his yawn
19:25 - 1 bumbing notebook question:
23:30- John almost gets into another fight
30:00 – John DOES get into another fight
44:50- CCD… Jesus Sunday school and john’s brawl with his parents
51:40 - SONG: “Sunburns” by JELLi (chris sauter)
Table of Nonsense:
Intro: Napoleon Dynamite
1:35 – if a tree falls in the woods, does it make a sound?
5:35 - Chris’s Pokemon glory
8:15 – Chris WHISTLES for the 2nd time in his life!
9:00 - MY SISTA LIVES HERE
14:40 – john observes teenagers hitting on one another in the wild
18:50 - Chris’s official street meat recommendation
20:20 - Chris microwaves lettuce.. debate: is that gross?
25:30 - Cuntie clubs down another caveman
30:40 - The art of courting a woman has been obliterated by online dating
33:30 - Chris almost gets seduced by a cross-dressing grandma
36:50 – Chris loves LIVE television because it gives him a sense of world community
38:20 - Chris’s Dawson’s creek confessions
42:15 - Every man has a “day of gay”
42:15 – THE 45 MINUTE TIMER ACTUALLY WORKS FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER
44:00 - John started hitting on girls at age 6
49:15 - Chris’s first tongue kiss in the 5th grade
53:00 - We are not pedophiles… we swear…
53:55 – John’s first make out
57:30 - @SHITOGRAPHY GOES PUBLIC
64:36 – SONG: “Greek Girls” by Snowflake the white rapper (John)
Table Of Nonsense:
0:00 - Intro: Ghostbusters, and the intoxicated podcast that will never be.
1:40: 2004 trip to the sex store results in fake vagina disaster at John's home
5:00: chris has a chris moment and is afraid to offend amish people with a podcast they'll never listen to, on the internet they don't even know exists
9:40 - 2007 trip to costco for condoms results in Chris asking the stupidest questionn of his life
12:20 - Chris gives you his yawn
12:30 - Rock hard cumdumpster sock can be used as a weapon
13:40 - Chris's genius invention: "Jizz Jeans"
16:15 - How to give your wife orgasms from the afterlife
17:45 - John's Funeral: Burn me bitches
22:20 - Chris literally says "FRUTATION" instead of "FRUITION" in a meeting at work.
27:00 - When a relationship is right, it's right. Chris's relationship adivce.
32:30 - John's tactic to disarm angry boyfriends
34:00 - John's strange cougar conundrum
36:55 - Chris doesn't understand exactly what "tits" are.
42:00 - Don't say "how was your day" too soon in a new encounter. You will scare the person away unless they're just as into you as you are them.
45:00 - John's family harasses him about his relationships
50:00 - Cuntie Apple Pay update.. the caveman comes back for more
51:00 - The New Orleans Uber ride that could have brutally ended our lives
59:00 - Pooping pants story
61:00 - Why doesn't Siri ever alert us that the 45 minute timer is up..
62:30 - SONG: Snowflake "My First Gangsta Rap"
64:00 - SOLVED: Why our timer never works.. (chris's fault)
Instagram: @twobumblingidiots
Table of Nonsense:
0:00 - Intro - Old School
3:15 - John's Shanghai Sham Job
8:37 - Chris hates counterfeit merchandise
12:15 - Once again john mistreats Siri and reduces his chances of receiving chris's imaginary apple kindness award
13:20 - Chris's Counterfeit stories: Monster Turbine Pro Copper edition earbuds & Shure Beta 58a microphone
19:30 - Chris spends $5500 on his dream microphone for his 30th birthday and gets SCAMMED.
27:00 - John's ebay blunder
30:20 - Amazon is plagued with counterfeit merchandise too
30:30 - DEXTER: Fuck that shitty ending. Showtime ruined an amazing series.
34:00 - Amazon sells Chris BOOTLEG Dexter DVD's
35:30 - Cuntie requests $9999 from a caveman and then proceeds to pretend she has a penis to scare him away.
42:00 - Some kid in Chris's highschool science class used to staple his arm. Like, literally staple his arm.
42:45 - John's middle school bully, and how it influenced him.
50:00 - Immature middle school Chris gives up his rocker clothes for stupid old navy and starts listening to Jay-Z to be "cool".
55:00 - Chris gets slapped in highschool by a bully and realizes the meaning of life.
58:55 - Bullies, although wastes of life and disrespectul towards all humans, CAN still serve a purpose.
62:50 - PRANK CALL: Mario Pt 2.
65:50- SONG: "The Gun Song" (circa 2002)
Follow us on instagram/facebook for additional media: @twobumblingidiots
Table of Nonsense:
0:00 - Intro: True Lies
1:25 - Chris’s official Holiday cake recommendation
5:20 – Now introducing: Psychedelic Dave
6:20 - Emotionally Disturbed close encounters
9:45 - The frightening false alarm Hawaii received about impending doom
15:00- Question of the hour – Kim Jong Un
18:00 – Tide pod challenge, cinnamon challenge, all these stupid challenges
21:50 – Chris thinks Apple is planning on giving out an award to people who have treated Siri with kindness instead of abusing her like John Matland
23:00 - Chris talks about how beautiful death is
28:30 – Chris talks about floating naked in outerspace in a sensory depravation chamber
32:00 - The facemask people that walk around the city… explained!!!
36:00 - Chris experiments with Testicular Torsion
42:00 - John hooks up with a hot military lieutenant and mental explosions ensue
54:20 - PRANK PHONE CALL
58:53 - SONG: "It's Not The End" by J.E.L.L.i.
Table of nonsense:
0:00- intro - your last moments on earth
2:50- john drops something into the toilet besides fecal matter
4:15 - chris interrupts john’s story with a makeshift ASMR session
6:00 - john’s toilet bowl story continues... almost
7:05- nick interrupts john’s story with a call
9:15- ok, NOW john’s story continues until completion
12:40- chris almost cracks his tooth
13:40 - john’s master-ass wiping tips
15:50- Ghost Attack 3: mysterious jazz music
17:50 - chris’s questionable-ass shaving techniques
20:20 – john’s official bidet recommendation
22:50- the mechanics of poo-pourri evades chris’s comprehension
24:30 - girls never poop because they are celestial angels
28:00- Hollywood is pissing john off with Harvey Weinstein jerking off into flower pots
30:00 Aziz Ansari and James Franco
33:20 - Time’s up movement
44:05 – Ghost Attack 4
45:45- Cuntie’s amazing caveman repellent system
47:30 - The story of the New Orleans palmetto bug freakout
62:18 – SONG: “The Tiny Cowboy” by Youth Moose
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