Zero Disturbance

108: The Tantrum Era: What the Male Loneliness Epidemic Reveals [Why Women Go To Therapy Series]


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In this episode, we reframe the viral conversation about “the male loneliness epidemic,” arguing that the issue isn’t loneliness — it’s a lack of curiosity.

Men are naming their feelings more openly (which is great), but many are stopping there. Instead of asking why women are distancing themselves or leaving relationships, many men blame women, double down on old power structures, or retreat into defensiveness.

We break down why this is happening, how power dynamics influence curiosity, and why women do not need to step in and fix or teach anyone. The capacity to learn exists — but curiosity must be a chosen behavior, not outsourced emotional labor.

⭐ Key Takeaways
  • This isn’t a “male loneliness epidemic”; it’s a “male curiosity epidemic.”
    The information men need has always been available.

  • Women have historically been forced to track men for safety and connection.
    Men have not been required to study women in the same way.

  • Some men are doubling down on tantrums, power, and control instead of learning.
    This is now showing natural consequences: disconnection and loneliness.

  • Women are not responsible for teaching grown men emotional intelligence.
    Curiosity is a choice, and refusing it carries its own outcomes.

  • Real connection requires respect, mutual curiosity, and shared responsibility.
    Without it, relationships become performative or imbalanced.
  • Note: This content is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional therapy. If you’re experiencing difficulties, please seek guidance from a licensed mental health provider. All stories, examples, and characters shared are fictionalized or composite representations. Any resemblance to actual persons or situations is purely coincidental and intended solely for educational illustration.

     

    Come learn with us at Zero Disturbance: 

    Want to learn more about empowering yourself to experience therapy or coaching on your terms? If you appreciated this episode, you wont want to miss out on The Client Workbook + supporting videos! https://www.zerodisturbance.com/client-workbook 

     

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    With a Masters in Education from Vanderbilt, Kambria has been creating trainings and teaching adult learners for over 20 years. As the Director of Education and Quality Improvement at Stanford Medical School, she created ease in complex systems, thereby giving medical trainees successful learning experiences. Now, as a dedicated mom, therapist, and EMDR Consultant, Kambria knows what it means to do things efficiently, effectively, and in a learner-centered way. When she isn't podcasting or creating online courses, you can find Kambria playing with her twins on a beach in California.

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    Zero DisturbanceBy Kambria Evans, The Teaching & Learning EMDR Consultant

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