Managing Rejection: Insights from the Bedroom to the Boardroom
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TL;DR: Managing Rejection
Rejection is universal, whether it’s in bed, at work, or in love, and it doesn’t have to derail your confidence or connection.
Our community shared 12 honest insights, from sharing initiation in relationships to reframing rejection as protection.
Big takeaways: talk about it, stop personalizing, rewrite shameful stories, and give yourself space to feel (or not).
A little self-awareness, humour, and empathy can turn rejection into resilience.
Want to soften rejection and strengthen connection? Listen to the full podcast episode and check out our pleasure-positive tools and tips because self-love, partner play, and a good vibrator can help ease even the sharpest “no.”
12 Insights on Rejection From Our Community
Rejection is universal, and yet the way we respond to it is deeply personal. For some, it evokes shame; for others, reflection. And often, it feels different when it happens at work versus in bed.
In a recent episode of the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast, we asked our community to share how they experience and manage rejection. The responses were raw, thoughtful, and relatable.
Whether you’re navigating emotional disconnection in a long-term relationship, building confidence while dating, or trying not to spiral after a “not tonight,” we hope these reflections offer comfort, clarity, or at least the knowledge that you’re not alone.
(Some of these have been edited for clarity/brevity.)
Why can women say no to sex, but when a guy says no, it’s crazy?
For me, it’s all about connection. When I get rejected over and over again, it brings up feelings of unlovability, unworthiness, being unimportant, etc. I’m working through some of that, but I also think it’s normal; in a monogamous sexual relationship. Taking care of myself doesn’t provide an emotional connection, and it can even hinder connection when it’s all I’m left with.
Rejection is just God’s Protection (it’s supposed to rhyme).Yes. Can we re-frame rejection to be something that safeguards us against things that aren’t good for us? Didn’t get that job because you didn’t click with the hiring team, maybe, you wouldn’t have liked working with them anyway? You approached someone to make a new connection, and they were aloof, maybe that’s not the energy you need in your life?
Don’t take it as a negative. Don’t take it personally. People have many different preferences. It’s not about you.
Accept rejection. Don’t let it turn into dejection. For me, it’s about not personalizing it. My GF isn’t in the mood? Cool. It has nothing to do with me. And honestly, I don’t feel like it’s my job to get her in the mood. Sometimes I will, but if she knows what she has to do to get herself in the mood too. She likes sex as much as I do. I know that for sure. So if she is working too much, or going out too much and feeling tired or not doing the things that facilitate her mood, it’s not about me. But this only applies since we started talking about sex. 10 years ago, I know she said no because the sex wasn’t so good for her. Now that I know what she likes. Now that we’ve both learned to be better lovers,