What is the difference between guilt and shame?

Guilt - "I did something bad."

Shame  - "I am bad."

Shame is a feeling that many of us deal with. It can be paralyzing because it’s not something we talk about openly and it has the power to cause deep shame in those that experience it. The cycle of shame can be a vicious one, where feelings that stem from shame lead to more shame until the victim becomes isolated and starts believing they’re unworthy.

The shame cycle might look like this: 

Engage in destructive behavior

Feel shame, guilt, and deep regret

Ruminate on the destructive behavior which deepens the feeling of shame even more 

Try to comfort yourself by give into same bad habits, addiction, and destructive behavior 

Three things that shame needs to grow:

secrecy

silence 

judgement 

Three steps to break the cycle of shame:

Talk to yourself like you talk to someone you love

Reach out to someone you trust

Tell your story. Shame cannot survive being spoken

Shame can be a paralyzing feeling because it’s not something we talk about openly and it has the power to cause deep shame in those that experience it. The cycle of shame can be a vicious one, where feelings that stem from shame lead to more shame until the victim becomes isolated and starts believing they’re unworthy. 

The good news is that we can break the cycle of shame and start to feel better about ourselves again. It takes time, patience, and effort, but it’s definitely possible. Remember that you’re not alone in this and there are people who care about you and want to help.

If you’re feeling lost or don’t know where to start, please don’t hesitate to reach out for help. You’re worth it.

@Positive_Impact_Andrew

www.TheAndrewSchultz.com