No More Desire ™ Porn Addiction Recovery

124: Men, Emotions, and Porn Addiction: Reclaiming Masculinity Without Shame


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Most men don’t struggle with porn addiction because they lack discipline.

They struggle because they were never taught how to understand, regulate, or work with their emotions.

In this episode, I sit down with Rich Savoy—a coach, leader with Husband Material, and longtime mentor to men—to have one of the most honest conversations I’ve ever had about men, emotions, masculinity, and porn addiction recovery. We go beneath behavior and willpower and into the emotional and psychological roots that quietly keep men stuck in the cycle of shame, relapse, and self-criticism.

If you’ve tried to quit porn and found yourself asking “Why do I keep going back?”—this episode will give you clarity, relief, and a new path forward.

In this conversation, we explore:

  • Why porn addiction is rarely about sex—and almost always about emotional pain
  • How emotional suppression and shame fuel compulsive porn use in men
  • The difference between healthy masculinity and the “man box” most of us were raised in
  • Why willpower fails and emotional intelligence changes everything
  • How Internal Family Systems (IFS) and parts work explain porn addiction at the root
  • Why the part of you that turns to porn isn’t broken—and what it’s actually trying to protect

We also talk candidly about firefighter parts, shame cycles, emotional avoidance, and why many faith-based or performance-driven recovery approaches unintentionally make porn addiction worse.

This episode is for men who are tired of fighting themselves.

Men who want to overcome porn addiction without shame.

Men who are ready to reclaim masculinity through presence, emotional awareness, and self-leadership—not suppression.

If you’ve ever felt trapped between wanting to be strong and feeling deeply human at the same time, this conversation will resonate.

Resources mentioned:

  • Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy
  • No Bad Parts by Dr. Richard Schwartz
  • Altogether You by Jenna Riemersma
  • Boundaries for Your Soul by Kim Miller
  • Podcasts and teachings from Drew Boa and Husband Material

If this episode helped you, I’d encourage you to listen with an open mind—and share it with a man who needs to hear that he’s not broken, weak, or beyond hope.

Porn addiction recovery is possible.

And it starts with emotional healing.

Explore more of Rich's work at:https://www.husbandmaterial.com/

Link to Blog Article for this Episode

If you’re ready to build the mindset and lifestyle that lead to long-term freedom from porn addiction, visit NoMoreDesire.com and apply for my 1-on-1 Porn Addiction Recovery Coaching Program. You’ll gain the structured tools, accountability, and training you need to transform not only your habits—but your heart.

Grab my Free eBook and Free Workshop for more strategies to overcome porn addiction, rewire your brain, and rebuild your life

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No More Desire ™ Porn Addiction RecoveryBy Jake Kastleman

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