There are a lot of voices out there telling you that all you need to quit porn addiction is more discipline. They say you just have to want it bad enough, fight hard enough, and exert enough self-control. But if you’ve ever tried to stop watching porn using willpower alone, you already know—it doesn’t work. In fact, relying on willpower actually fuels porn addiction. Today, I’m going to show you why, and more importantly, what works instead.

Willpower Is a Symptom of Recovery, Not the Cause of It

We are taught that staying strong, thinking positively, and being highly motivated are the keys to quitting porn. But here’s the problem—these are not the causes of recovery; they are the results of it.

Real recovery from pornography addiction is not about forcing yourself to resist urges. It’s about becoming the kind of person who naturally doesn’t need porn anymore. Willpower alone won’t get you there. Instead, lasting freedom requires both “will” and “power.” These don’t come from sheer effort but from creating a new way of living that removes the underlying causes of porn addiction in the first place.

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Why doesn’t God take away your porn addiction? People tell you to give your addiction to Christ, and it doesn’t seem to work for you. Why? 

I remember how frustrated I used to be by this concept of giving my addiction over to Christ. People advised me to simply surrender to Christ and that was the answer to get sober. But it didn’t work for me. I thought this might be because God didn’t love me, didn’t care, or that I was simply too sinful a person. 

I’ve worked with men across the world who struggle with these beliefs, and I’ve helped them find success in porn addiction recovery. 

The key is not to simply give your addiction to Christ, but to understand how to successfully integrate truths and approaches from spirituality, religion, and psychology to provide a powerful force for quitting porn. 

By combining methods from both psychology and faith, you can overcome porn addiction. I did it myself and I teach men across the world to do the same. 

Empowering Recovery Through Effective Spiritual & Psychological Practices

Regular spiritual practice is a catalyst for growth in all other areas of your life. It acts as a driving force for positive growth in your sobriety, relationships, career, health, ambition, and more.

This article will give you insights into why spirituality and faith are so crucial for recovery, how to include both psychology and God in overcoming porn addiction, and common mistakes that addicts make when asking God to help them quit porn.

BUILD THE NO MORE PORN LIFESTYLE

FREE WORKSHOP: The 8 Keys to Lose Your Desire for Porn

FREE EBOOK: The 10 Tools to Conquer Porn Cravings

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MORE EPISODES

Christianity and Porn Addiction | How to Overcome Sexual & Religious Shame

How to Tell Your Wife About Your Porn Relapse

How to Help Someone with a Porn Addiction in 3 Steps

Stop Porn Cravings | 7 Tools to Overcome Fantasizing & Lust Habits

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Do you feel like your wife is ignoring your progress with porn addiction? That she doesn’t understand how difficult it is for you to quit porn?

Do you feel like you can get sober for a few weeks, or even a few months, but when you relapse with porn it is devastating for her, and you have to start over from square one? 

Do you feel like you can’t do anything right in her eyes because of your pornography addiction? That she sees even your best intentions to be loving and kind as selfish and self-centered?  

Do you feel disrespected? That your opinions and needs don’t matter because of what you’ve done? That you don’t have a say.

Do you feel like you’re walking on eggshells, that your spouse is constantly angry and the smallest thing might set her off? Either into anxiety and depression, or into fury and distrust? 

Do you question how much of the problems in your relationship are from you or her? Do you wonder if it is all because of your addiction, but also can’t help seeing how controlling, angry, and insecure she is? You think maybe it’s your fault that she’s this way. But it can’t be all your fault, can it? 

We talk about this and much more in today’s episode.

BUILD THE NO MORE PORN LIFESTYLE

FREE WORKSHOP: The 8 Keys to Lose Your Desire for Porn

FREE EBOOK: The 10 Tools to Conquer Porn Cravings

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Intensive Porn Addiction Recovery Program

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MORE EPISODES

The Science Behind Porn Addiction—and How to Stop

Christianity and Porn Addiction | How to Overcome Sexual & Religious Shame

How to Tell Your Wife About Your Porn Relapse

The 4 Root Causes of Porn Addiction

How to Help Someone with a Porn Addiction in 3 Steps

Stop Porn Cravings | 7 Tools to Overcome Fantasizing & Lust Habits

Trauma, Attachment, Shame & Porn Addiction

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Do you believe that you are genetically prone to addiction? What if you could alter these genetics? 

Today, I speak with Dr. Evelyn Higgins with Wired for Addiction about the science behind porn addiction, specifically the impact of epigenetics on addiction. 

According to Dr. Higgins, we can alter our genetic expression, developing a completely different way of life, and rewiring our brain to overcome porn addiction. 

Dr. Evelyn Higgins is an internationally recognized expert in epidemiology of substance use disorders, mental health conditions, and process addictions like social media, video game, and porn addiction. 

Across Western culture, we have a pervasive belief that our genetics play a condemning role in our lives, that they are determined, we can't change them, and they lead to outcomes we have little to no control over.

Once an addict, always an addict... 

Epigenetics flips this belief on its head.

It is not your destiny to deal with addiction cravings for life. That is not my story. It doesn't have to be yours. 

Pornography addiction is a battle that many face, often in silence. It’s not just about willpower—it’s about understanding what’s happening in your brain and body. 

BUILD THE NO MORE PORN LIFESTYLE

FREE WORKSHOP: The 8 Keys to Lose Your Desire for Porn

FREE EBOOK: The 10 Tools to Conquer Porn Cravings

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Intensive Porn Addiction Recovery Program

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MORE ARTICLES

Prevent Porn Cravings & Relapse Through Emotional Awareness Techniques

Christianity and Porn Addiction | How to Overcome Sexual & Religious Shame

How to Tell Your Wife About Your Porn Relapse

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- Aleksey Chistilin and Oleksandr Stepanov from Pixabay

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Today, I’m joined by Owen Marcus, an expert in somatic and emotional healing for men across the world. His company is called MELD. He is highly knowledgeable, with 30+ years of experience, and it was a real pleasure speaking with him.

Many of us men struggle to express our emotions. It’s classic! What we may not know, though, is that unprocessed hard emotions can easily evolve into porn cravings and porn relapse.

Anger and shame (the feeling of not being good enough) often drove my cravings for porn. And I hadn’t a clue this was happening!

This skill of noticing your emotions, processing through them, and being able to sit with them when they’re uncomfortable is crucial for recovery from porn addiction. This is because from a psychological perspective, hard emotions and insecurities (and I know that’s a swearword for a lot of us men) are at the root of our porn addiction.

In my program, I teach men specific methods to get deep into these emotions, reflect on them, and become experts at effectively working through them so that these fundamental human insecurities don’t evolve into cravings for porn.

BUILD THE NO MORE PORN LIFESTYLE

FREE WORKSHOP: The 8 Keys to Lose Your Desire for Porn

FREE EBOOK: The 10 Tools to Conquer Porn Cravings

Schedule a Free Consultation

Intensive Porn Addiction Recovery Program

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MORE ARTICLES

How to Rewire Your Brain, Quit Porn, and Reclaim Your Life

Christianity and Porn Addiction | How to Overcome Sexual & Religious Shame

Childhood Trauma, Porn Addiction & Seeking Safety in Pleasure and Escape

How to Help Someone with a Porn Addiction in 3 Steps

Stop Porn Cravings | 7 Tools to Overcome Fantasizing & Lust Habits

The Porn Addiction Funnel: How To Break Porn Addiction

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I had an excellent conversation with Tony Smith from The Walk Family Podcast - a Christian podcast for parents. It was a huge privilege talking with Tony about the true struggle of pornography addiction in this country and around the world. 

As many of you guys know, porn addiction is rampant. This is no longer the 90’s where the internet was new - porn is now recognized as a legitimate addiction across the world. 

While it has not yet been officially included in the DSM (the Diagnostic Statistical Manual within the psychology field) I believe that is coming soon. It has become impossible to ignore. 

iPads, cell phones, computers...we really have set ourselves up to be an addicted society unfortunately. And not just to porn. 

Internet addiction, social media addiction, and other digital addictions that have become commonplace. Now, in small kids as well. We’re raising a society of digital addicts. 

In this conversation, Tony and I talk about my personal journey overcoming porn addiction, and I talk about how I’m helping men do the same thing in my 1-on-1 coaching business. 

There are many different psychological and behavioral strategies and tactics you can use to decrease your need for porn and eventually quit porn entirely. There are physical, emotional, and social roots of porn addiction that you can address and overcome. 

So I hope this episode is a blessing to you guys. Let’s dive in with Tony Smith from the Walk Family Podcast.

BUILD THE NO MORE PORN LIFESTYLE

FREE WORKSHOP: The 8 Keys to Lose Your Desire for Porn

FREE EBOOK: The 10 Tools to Conquer Porn Cravings

Schedule a Free Consultation

Intensive Porn Addiction Recovery Program

Join My Email Newsletter

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MORE ARTICLES

Christianity and Porn Addiction | How to Overcome Sexual & Religious Shame

Childhood Trauma, Porn Addiction & Seeking Safety in Pleasure and Escape

How to Help Someone with a Porn Addiction in 3 Steps

8 Rules to Get You 3 Months Sober from Porn

Stop Porn Cravings | 7 Tools to Overcome Fantasizing & Lust Habits

The Porn Addiction Funnel: How To Break Porn Addiction

Music by Bensound.com 

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As a porn addiction recovery coach, I see clients of all backgrounds - religious and irreligious. Christianity and porn addiction often go hand-in-hand in my experience. I know that they did for me.

I love my faith, but the reality is that many Christians carry burdensome shame about their sexuality, and others about their porn habit. This sexual shame is part of what drives their addiction. 

Many of us grew up being taught (explicitly or implicitly) that sexuality is dangerous, and is to be feared and strictly controlled. We were taught that physical attraction or desiring a woman is sinful, “inappropriate”, or immoral. 

Fear of sexuality was often unconsciously used by our parents and ecclesiastical leaders to prevent us from committing sexual sin or degrading our bodies with promiscuous sexual acts. 

I understand this tendency to use fear as a motivator, and I know that many of these parents and leaders are well-meaning. Unfortunately, though, what many often do not understand is that this approach to preventing sexual promiscuity is damaging and fills people with sexual shame. Not only that, but paradoxically it can actually drive the promiscuity it seeks to inhibit. 

In today's episode, I explore these topics with you. I also talk about why Christians may struggle with porn addiction more than anyone else, and how a perfectionistic relationship with God can be one of the foundational drivers of pornography addiction. I also discuss psychological and lifestyle methods you can use to overcome religious shame, strengthen your faith, and stop porn addiction.

BUILD THE NO MORE PORN LIFESTYLE

FREE WORKSHOP: The 8 Keys to Lose Your Desire for Porn

FREE EBOOK: The 10 Tools to Conquer Porn Cravings

Schedule a Free Consultation

Intensive Porn Addiction Recovery Program

Join My Email Newsletter

MORE EPISODES

Childhood Trauma, Porn Addiction & Seeking Safety in Pleasure and Escape

How to Tell Your Wife About Your Porn Relapse

The 4 Root Causes of Porn Addiction

How to Help Someone with a Porn Addiction in 3 Steps

Stop Porn Cravings | 7 Tools to Overcome Fantasizing & Lust Habits

The Porn Addiction Funnel: How To Break Porn Addiction

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Today's episode is from the New Paths podcast. Dan Johnson and I tag-team it again and talk porn addiction recovery, touching heavily on my personal porn addiction story.

In today's episode, I'm going to dig in some to my childhood trauma, as well as sexual trauma, getting a bit vulnerable with you.

I want to say from the get-go, I didn't experience severe trauma. My heart goes out to those who have, including many of my clients and friends in recovery.

Rather, I grew up as a kid with a very sensitive and anxious mind. I was prone towards mental illness, obsessive compulsive behaviors, perfectionism, and I had a sexually traumatic experience when I was a kid that defined many of my views of sex and arousal.

I also had other types of experiences in my childhood and youth that some people might see as, you know, normal!

But with this episode, I really want to drive home how we shouldn't compare our trauma to one another. We shouldn't look at our past and say, "Well, yeah. I didn't really experience anything hard, so I don't think my pornography addiction could be driven by anything from my childhood."

Look, I did that for many years. When it comes down to it though, we all carry stuff! So, I talk about some of that stuff with Dan, and get real about it.

We talk about how I sought safety, pleasure and escape, not just through porn, but through other things like video games, food, television, etc.

And we talk about how to quit porn using recovery mindset and lifestyle strategies.

It's an extremely valuable episode, I think. Again, it was a huge privilege for me to be on.

BUILD THE NO MORE PORN LIFESTYLE

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FREE EBOOK: The 10 Tools to Conquer Porn Cravings

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Emotional Drivers of Porn Addiction, Healing Trauma, Saving Your Marriage

The 4 Root Causes of Porn Addiction

How to Help Someone with a Porn Addiction in 3 Steps

8 Rules to Get You 3 Months Sober from Porn

Stop Porn Cravings | 7 Tools to Overcome Fantasizing & Lust Habits

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Every man or woman who struggles with porn addiction carries trauma and emotional struggles. 

In my own personal porn addiction recovery journey, I’ve come to understand many things about the emotional pain that I carry. And by understanding it, I’ve been able to release much of it, and I continue to after a decade of sobriety from porn. 

In my professional work with clients, I’ve come to see many of the same patterns - the same burdens, insecurities, and coping mechanisms. 

If you or a loved one is suffering from porn addiction, you must understand that the addiction goes much deeper than a desire for sexual pleasure, and today we talk about these deep psychological dynamics. 

In this episode, I am privileged to be with HollyKem and Dean Sunseri, authors of A Roadmap to the Soul and incredible coaches that have been helping people across the world for over 30 years.

Dean is a Licensed Professional Counselor and holds a Doctorate in Ministry, and HollyKem has experience as a Substance Abuse Counselor. Their approach is powerful and compassionate. 

In today's episode we dig deep into the mental and emotional drivers of pornography addiction, We talk about why people can’t get sober, and we discuss bad advice we get that actually makes pornography addiction worse. 

We also talk about healing past trauma, how to forgive yourself and others, how to quit porn, and how to save your marriage AND improve your sex life. 

BUILD THE NO MORE PORN LIFESTYLE

FREE WORKSHOP: The 8 Keys to Lose Your Desire for Porn

FREE EBOOK: The 10 Tools to Conquer Porn Cravings

Schedule a Free Consultation

Intensive Porn Addiction Recovery Program

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MORE EPISODES

3 Easy Steps to Stop Porn Addiction | The Frontline Framework with Dan Johnson

How to Tell Your Wife About Your Porn Relapse

The 4 Root Causes of Porn Addiction

How to Help Someone with a Porn Addiction in 3 Steps

8 Rules to Get You 3 Months Sober from Porn

Stop Porn Cravings | 7 Tools to Overcome Fantasizing & Lust Habits

Music by Bensound.com 

Faith That Challenges. Conversations that Matter. Laughs included. Subscribe Now!
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In the episode, Dan Johnson gives you 3 easy steps to stop porn addiction. This process is called The Frontline Framework.

Dan Johnson with New Paths is another man just like myself helping men overcome porn addiction. 

Dan and I not only discuss this framework but also dive into multiple psychological and lifestyle strategies you can begin using right now to quit porn. 

BUILD THE NO MORE PORN LIFESTYLE

FREE WORKSHOP: The 8 Keys to Lose Your Desire for Porn

FREE EBOOK: The 10 Tools to Conquer Porn Cravings

Schedule a Free Consultation

Intensive Porn Addiction Recovery Program

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MORE ARTICLES

1 Year of Porn Addiction Withdrawals | What to Expect During Your First Year After Quitting & How to Stay Sober

How to Tell Your Wife About Your Porn Relapse

The 4 Root Causes of Porn Addiction

How to Help Someone with a Porn Addiction in 3 Steps

8 Rules to Get You 3 Months Sober from Porn

Stop Porn Cravings | 7 Tools to Overcome Fantasizing & Lust Habits

Trauma, Attachment, Shame & Porn Addiction

The Porn Addiction Funnel: How To Break Porn Addiction

Music by Bensound.com

Faith That Challenges. Conversations that Matter. Laughs included. Subscribe Now!
Breaking down faith, culture & big questions - a mix of humor with real spiritual growth.

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No More Desire