I Have ADHD Podcast

271 The Ex Good Girl: A Recent ADHD Diagnosis, Perimenopause, and How to Stop Avoiding Difficult Conversations with Sara Fisk


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In today’s episode, I’m joined by the woman who trained ME as a coach, the incredible Sara Fisk. Sara helps people pleasers stop avoiding difficult conversations, and let me tell you, we GET INTO IT on this episode.

From understanding ADHD symptoms in adulthood to dealing with perimenopause, this conversation covers it all. We also explore the concept of being an “ex good girl,” focusing on self-care and moving away from people-pleasing behaviors.

Sara shares her reflections on her Mormon upbringing, achievements, and the challenges of moving from a rule-based system to making choices based on personal preferences. For both of us, our ADHD diagnoses clarified a lot of past behaviors related to rejection sensitivity and constant pleasing. This shift has allowed us to make decisions for our personal satisfaction rather than conforming to societal norms.

Throughout our conversation, we delve into the importance of prioritizing personal values over seeking approval from others. We discuss how shame, anxiety, and fear can impact decision-making and the need to embrace our emotions.

Sara’s training in somatic experiencing and internal family systems has helped her redirect self-criticism and assert control over her decisions and emotions. We highlight the significance of building an internal dialogue, working with emotions, setting boundaries, and being assertive, especially for individuals with ADHD.

We wrap up our conversation by emphasizing the importance of self-acceptance, authenticity, and navigating emotions with compassion. Sarah and I share our personal experiences of embracing vulnerability and finding strength through prioritizing our needs in relationships. It’s been such a powerful discussion, and I hope you find it as enlightening as I did. Remember, you’re not alone in this journey, and there’s a whole community here to support you.

Get in touch with Sara Fisk

Hang out with me on Instagram!

Watch on YouTube!

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I Have ADHD PodcastBy Kristen Carder

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