Esin Pinarli, a psychotherapist with 18 years of experience, joins Ali to talk about people-pleasing, attachment, and what she calls modern codependency. Esin breaks down the unspoken childhood contracts we sign without realizing it, and how codependency shows up today in high-achieving, self-sufficient women who would never picture themselves as the "lost yourself in a relationship" type. The conversation also includes a refresher on the four attachment styles and the wheel of attachment, the anxious-avoidant dance, deactivating strategies, and how you actually earn your security over time through small, repeated choices.

In Updates, Ali survives a brutal New York heat wave and starts a new running list with Skyline: bars that have way better food than they deserve to have, kicking things off with Abe's Pagoda in Bushwick.

This week's Media Mention is creator Sam Showalter (@thesam_show on TikTok), whose series on decentering her husband tied in perfectly to the conversation about modern codependency.

Sam’s video Ali mentions

Where to find Esin: On Instagram @esinpinarli_lcsw and at www.eternalwellnesscounseling.com.

Timestamps: Esin joins us at around minute 17.

Ask questions, make a Storytime submission, or give feedback here: https://tinyurl.com/fmhpodqs

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