Psychologists Off the Clock

362. Adult Bullies and High Conflict People with Bill Eddy

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Ever had to deal with someone who just seems impossible to reason with? You know, the kind of person who always blames others and seems to turn every minor disagreement into a conflict? If you've been there, you’ll want to check out this episode with Bill Eddy, Chief Innovation Officer of the High Conflict Institute and an expert in understanding high-conflict personalities and dealing with adult bullies. We talk about the characteristics of high-conflict individuals, the psychological impact on their victims, and effective strategies from his book Our New World of Adult Bullies: How to Spot Them -- How to Stop Them to navigate these relationships. Tune in and empower yourself with concrete tools and expert advice to diffuse high-conflict behavior effectively and change how you handle bullies in your life!


Listen and Learn: 
  • Identifying the four main traits of high-conflict personalities 
  • Do all individuals with personality disorders fit the high conflict profile?
  • How to identify if you have a relationship with someone with a high-conflict personality
  • The differences between adult bullies and child bullies
  • What is the primary motivation for bullying behavior? 
  • The surprise attack tactic bullies often use and how you can be less vulnerable to them
  • What is a negative advocate, and how do people end up in that role?
  • Using the BIFF method in communication to avoid blame cycles and maintain constructive dialogue
  • Why you should never label the behavior of a high-conflict person or bully? 
  • Combating bullying in political and online realms and why this demands societal action through education and setting boundaries

    • Resources:
    • highconflictinstitute.com
    • Connect with Bill @highconflictinstitute on socials:
    • https://www.linkedin.com/company/high-conflict-institute
    • https://twitter.com/highconflict?lang=en
    • https://www.instagram.com/highconflictinstitute/
    • It's All Your Fault! The High Conflict Institute Podcast
    • Psychology Today Blog: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/5-types-people-who-can-ruin-your-life
    • Bill’s books: 
    • Our New World of Adult Bullies: How to Spot Them -- How to Stop Them
    • 5 Types of People Who Can Ruin Your Life: Identifying and Dealing with Narcissists, Sociopaths, and Other High-Conflict Personalities
    • Biff: Quick Responses to High-Conflict People, Their Personal Attacks, Hostile Email and Social Media Meltdowns
    • Splitting: Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Someone with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder

      About Bill Eddy: 

      Bill Eddy is Chief Innovation Officer of the High Conflict Institute based in San Diego, California. He trains lawyers, judges, mediators, and therapists throughout the United States and a dozen other countries in managing high-conflict family, workplace and legal disputes. He is the author of over 20 books and manuals and has a popular blog on PsychologyToday.com.


      Related episodes: 
      • 98. Narcissism with Avigail Lev and Robyn Walser
      • 308. Identifying and Surviving Gaslighting with Robin Stern
      • 292. Adult Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers with Stephanie Kriesberg
      • 263. Relationships with Emotionally Immature People with Lindsay Gibson
      • 186. Set Boundaries Find Peace with Nedra Tawwab
      • 298. Drama Free with Nedra Tawwab
      • 276. Assertive Communication Skills with Randy Paterson

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