4 Powerful Keys to Reclaim Your Personal Power After a Toxic Relationship (Plus Q&A) - Going through a toxic relationship of any sort does a real number on your self-esteem and your ability to trust and believe in yourself. Nearly everyone who has survived a relationship with a toxic narcissist experiences at the very least, a slight dip in their self-esteem, but when we have also been raised by toxic people or when we have struggled with other kinds of trauma, we come out of these relationships completely crushed - with little to no self-esteem. We forget who we are (or we never really knew) and we think we don't deserve to be happy or that we aren't worth being treated with love and respect.

Or, we just decide we're better off alone and we steer clear of most people. Worse, when we aren't aware of what we've experienced and what it all means, we find ourselves jumping into toxic relationship after toxic relationship, never taking the time to heal ourselves and learn how to end the toxic relationship cycle in our lives.

We fail to set boundaries and we allow people to walk all over us - we allow life to HAPPEN TO US, rather than choosing the life we want.

All of this is the direct result of not understanding how to heal ourselves properly. So today, I'm going to share with you the four keys to healing your own self-esteem so that you can create a life you love.

Heal Your Own Self Esteem with a Focus on These 4 Things

Self-esteem is often linked directly with success in life for a number of reasons. If you’re not confident in yourself, you likely won’t get very far at all because you won’t be able to take any initiative.

There are four main factors that influence your self-esteem: feelings, thoughts, behaviors, and actions. How well you develop each factor will determine how much self-esteem you have, and in turn, will affect your success.

Feelings are the most basic of the four factors. This is how you react emotionally immediately after something happens. If you have a lot of negative feelings, you might be quick to be annoyed or get upset.

You need to adapt your feelings in such a way that you’ll be more likely to react positively to things and are able to handle negative feelings well. Feelings are very important in self-esteem because they can dictate how you handle certain situations, whether it be in a positive or negative way.

Thoughts can hold the most weight out of the four factors. Thoughts are anything you might have running through your head, and these can have an effect on your feelings, behaviors, and actions.

Negative thoughts might be thinking about things that you’re stressed about and doubting your abilities to do things. You need to be able to recognize negative thoughts and stop them immediately and develop positive thoughts in order to help your self-esteem.

Behaviors are difficult to recognize because these are the things you do subconsciously. For example, walking around hunched with your head low and shoulders slumped might be a sign of low confidence, but you don’t necessarily recognize that you do it.

Try asking friends if they notice any certain things that you do, and once you notice them, you’ll be able to work on them – or be very self-aware of how you behave on an hourly basis.

Actions are the final step that will connect your self-esteem to success. One of the worst actions that you might be taking is inaction, or doing nothing at all. By learning how to take risks and put your thoughts into action, you’ll not only boost your success, but you’ll also have a higher feeling of self-esteem.

All of these factors build on one another, with thoughts affecting reactions, reactions affecting behaviors, and behaviors affecting actions. In order to know how to be confident in yourself, you have to have a good grip on those factors.

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