John has eaten some chocolate just before recording and now he’s all glum. So it’s up to Elis and Dave to get him out of his funk. Their options: 1. Take his trousers off. 2. Give him a wedgie. 3. Let him tell his anecdote about going to a folk gig and sitting in front of an annoying couple. One wonders which they’ll pick?

After the chunk funk (chocolate funk) has subsided, there’s more premium bond chat, and after Elis’s poor showing around Valentine’s Day last week, dating expert LalalaLetMeExplain stops by to impart some romantic wisdom.

If you have any of the following: some tips for Elis’s love life, a mad dad, or a story about winning loads of money, then we want to hear from you. Send all your guff to [email protected], or WhatsApp the show on 07974 293 022.