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Anthony Benenati, founder of City Yoga and That’s Not Yoga®, shares his personal evolution from his earliest experiences with yoga to developing a practice that meets each individual where they are. In this conversation, he explores breaking limiting ideas about yoga, uncovering its deeper meaning, and building genuine human connection through mindful movement. He also reflects on how curiosity, learning, and purposeful steps can lead to lasting change. This is a conversation about healing, empowerment, and finding a practice that truly serves you.
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Guest Bio:
Anthony Benenati is the founder of City Yoga, The first Anusara yoga studio in California and That's Not Yoga® , a culmination of three decades of study and practice in the Hatha Yoga tradition. Anthony’s philosophy is simple; fit the yoga to the student, not the student to the yoga. He believes that it isn’t about the style of yoga you practice, rather, the effectiveness of that style for your body. Yoga practice should help you transform, not cause more suffering.
Anthony draws from a deep knowledge of the different classical styles of modern yoga and other modalities to construct a path of healing and transformation for their student. Anthony has trained in Kundalini, Ashtanga, Iyengar, Anusara and Viniyoga. He specializes in Yoga Therapeutics and tailors the practice so your body uses its natural movements to heal itself from pain and suffering. He has taught globally and has trained thousands of students.
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Episode Transcript:
Anthony Benenati 0:00
One of the misconceptions about yoga is that anything goes, right, and that is so far from the truth. If yoga is about anything, it's about setting meaningful boundaries.
Lesley Logan 0:12
Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.
Lesley Logan 0:51
All right, Be It babe. I am so stoked for you to hear today's interview. Our guest today is actually a dear friend of Brad and mine, and he is a person we have quoted on the podcast before, and he's someone we said, we have to get him on the pod. And guess what? We did it. And also, I can't believe this is the first time he's on the pod. I feel like he'll be a regular conversation, because it's just really fun to hear him share his perspective, and he is an amazing yoga teacher. And this is as much of a yoga podcast as it's not a yoga podcast episode, because we talk a lot about what really is yoga, and what does it mean to have a yoga practice, and what is it trying to teach us? And if you think you know what yoga is I'm gonna challenge you to listen, because I think it's really easy for us to have been fed something that it's not and then not realize, like, the amazing benefits that it has. And so I'm not gonna say anymore, because this episode is just one of my favorite it's gonna go hands down and one I'll quote in the future. And I knew that when I brought him on, I just knew that we would have an amazing conversation, and this is hopefully going to entertain, educate and inspire you. So here is Anthony Benenati.
Lesley Logan 2:09
All right, Be It babe, I'm really excited. This person is actually a dear friend, like I know I've said that about some guests, but usually they're a dear friend of like, a couple moments. This person I've known for like, 10 years, and Brad has known him much longer, he's been a regular in our lives. Anthony Benenati, you are one of the best yoga teachers I know, but also so much more than that. Can you tell everyone who you are and what you rock at?
Anthony Benenati 2:33
Well, first of all, thank you for having me on. What an honor. Who am I? Anthony Benenati, you said my name. I am, believe it or not, a yoga teacher, a professional yoga teacher. I've been doing this for 32 years now, which, when I tell people that I teach yoga, they they have immediate this vision of what that might be.
Lesley Logan 2:56
Yes, you should be in white.
Anthony Benenati 2:59
I should be in white or.
Lesley Logan 3:02
With a glow.
Anthony Benenati 3:04
It's not very serious or, right? Everybody has their assumptions of what yoga is, which, my job is to help educate and instruct on what the practice truly is versus what it has become. The practice that sort of everybody knows now, versus really, what it truly is and what its goal is.
Lesley Logan 3:29
Yeah, I feel like we could also, like, talk about that for hours, because I had someone send me a reel of a guy on a Reformer with a, like, stationary bike in his hands and feet. And it was a joke. It was like an April Fool's joke. And he was like, okay, guys like, this class, we get cardio and core and like, he's holding the bike, he's it's obviously a joke. But like someone sent it to me, and I'm like, the fact that this is so hilarious that people who've never done Pilates before are sending this to me, tells me that what people think Pilates is has strayed far from what Pilates is. So I feel like I can understand that. And I find myself constantly educating people a little bit like, well, that yes, those are Pilates exercises and so, but it's not the inherent reality of it is. And so I feel like I understand that plight, that that journey you're on, in a little bit.
Anthony Benenati 4:18
You and I have had this conversation many times before, because you're so close to the source of it, and and that's what I love about what you do, what you teach, and where I am, and what I teach, is that there's a lineage, and you're very close to the source, and the closer you are to the source, the more authentic the teaching, the further down the line you get disconnected from that core source. Then everything starts to get watered down and miscommunicated. Lots of stuff gets forgotten.
Lesley Logan 4:55
Yeah, well, it's like the game of telephone, like, I mean, like when you play that game in school, like, you, the further it goes down the line.
Anthony Benenati 5:03
The more warped it gets.
Lesley Logan 5:04
Yes, yes. And it's funny, but also, like, that is the reality. Can we take a step back? Because, like, a yoga instructor of 32 years, that is a long time. And I think, like, there's not many of you. I mean, there's many of you, probably in India places, but like, there's not many of people who've had that many decades and and have studied the way that you have like, did you grow up like doing yoga? Did you want to be a yoga teacher?
Anthony Benenati 5:32
No, this story is, is pretty remarkable. No, I did not grow up with yoga. In fact, I didn't really understand what yoga was until I was literally introduced to it after I moved here to L.A. So I've been in L.A. since 1991 before that, I was in the military. I was in the Air Force. And when I was in the Air Force, I was a competitive power lifter, and I played sports all my life. So my body was pretty wrecked in my 20s. I had a shoulder surgery and a knee surgery already, and I remember I was waiting tables, and I had met this girl, and I was taken by the way she sort of carried herself. She was she walked very upright, almost Royal. And I thought, you know, it's L.A., everyone's moving to LA to become an actress. And I thought, okay, this girl, right, she's like telling her family, I don't want your money, I'm moving to L.A. and I'm going to be an actress. So I asked her, and she laughed in my face, and she lifted up the back of her shirt, and she showed me a 13-inch scar on her spine. And she told me that when she was young, she had this incredible S curve in her back, and she was in a full body cast from her neck all the way down through her torso. And I said, oh, my God, that that sounds painful. And I said how do you move? You can't, I haven't seen you bend. She goes, I can't. The only thing I can bend is my hips. I can turn my hips, but I cannot bend my back. I said, well, what do you do for relief? And she said, I do yoga. And I was like, Well, explain what's that and how does that help you? And she said, I'd love to explain it, but I don't think I can. Why don't you just come to a class? So I did, and you know, me then, I was really big. I had all this muscle mass, right? And I went to my first class, and I could not finish, could not finish the class. It kicked my butt. And I was so, my ego got, got triggered. And one of the things that's important for me as a teacher now when I teach my students is that there is, yoga doesn't see things in good and bad. Yoga see thing, sees things in does it work or not? And at the time, ego served me, because it made me go back, and it made me go back and it made me go back. At the time, the reasons because I think I was going to get it, and that's fine for whatever, for whatever reason someone enters into the practice is fine, you're there. That's the important part. We can work on the why and the why always evolves as you get along through the practice. But for me, I tell people, ego brought me to yoga and it it kept me there.
Lesley Logan 8:34
Yeah, I think, isn't it interesting, like, because I'll have I work with teachers, and they're like, oh, I don't want to work with people who want to lose weight. And I'm like, I, you don't have to promise them anything you can't do. But if, if that brought them into the space, I would much rather you a non like someone who's not going to manipulate or use them or lie to them to be the safe landing for them to find a movement practice that can help them love the body that they have, you know? So I'm not here to be I won't take you if you want to lose weight. I'll just say, here's the science of weight loss, here's how I can fit in and and here's how I don't, you know, but this is what we can do together and like building that trust. And if that's what brought them in, and that's what got them to keep coming at the beginning, but then they stay coming because of how it makes them feel, and then they become a person who doesn't worry about that, because they actually care more about how they feel than how that what the scale says. Like, to me, that's kind of like that same thing. Like, I think too often people are wanting to turn away that negative energy, that negative energy in air quotes, because that's not what something is. But really it's like, you can't just, you don't, we don't get to decide how people come to us.
Anthony Benenati 9:48
Right.
Lesley Logan 9:49
All we can do is like, kind of be a space for them to evolve and learn the what, what, what they wanted, what they're here, what we can teach them.
Anthony Benenati 9:57
Yeah, I'm glad that you said that. I'm glad that you said that to create the space, because that's exactly what it is, isn't it? It's like we want to create a safe space for them to explore them, and not come in with this bunch of judgment that I'm putting on to them so that they feel uncomfortable. I want them to feel as comfortable as they can. Starting anything new is difficult. We all know that. Let's not make it harder.
Lesley Logan 10:22
Yeah, yeah. I also like that you said there's like, there's not bad or good.
Anthony Benenati 10:28
That's a radical, that's a radical idea for people. In the West, we are programmed this is good and this is bad. I can even hear, you probably hear this in your students' languages too. Oh, that's my bad side, or I have a bad leg, or I have a bad shoulder. And I'm careful with that, careful with the languaging. It's not bad. It may be injured, it may be weaker, it may be tighter, but that doesn't mean it's bad.
Lesley Logan 10:55
Yeah. And I, well, I, there was a years ago, like years ago. I can remember where I was driving, but I can't remember the name of the podcast, I was in traffic on San Vicente trying to get to Wilson Boulevard, and I was listening this podcast, and they talked about how, like, we have to be mindful of how we talk about our body, because our body is listening. And they have done studies that, if you like, say, I gained weight, I'm someone who can't lose weight, like, I I'm fat. All this your bod, those people who say that they actually have seen that they produce fat cells, like, that's what they do, right? Versus like, they also, like, told people, like, oh, you had this knee surgery. And the person goes, oh, I had knee surgery, so my knee is better. They didn't have knee surgery. They literally didn't give it to them. They just pretended they put them under they had controls, don't worry there's other things, but.
Anthony Benenati 11:42
The placebo effect.
Lesley Logan 11:44
What you tell your body like really does matter and and I studied with BJ Fogg, who's the found who wrote Tiny Habits, and he's really the leading scientist on habits that everybody has been stealing from and, not stealing, it's the wrong word, they probably study with them, but at any rate, he said there's no such thing as a bad or good habit. Everything serves you. Every like the habits you don't like about yourself, if you don't like that you scroll on the internet. If you don't like that you binge-watch NetFlix that they'll all the habits we have serve us, they provide something because your brain actually doesn't want to be around anything that causes judgment or shame. So it, it's seeking, like, oh, like, maybe it's comfortable for you to it's soothing to just binge out and watch something you get you get to avoid the other thoughts you have, or with certainty, which we all are looking for and and so he said, If you so, you can't ever say I have a bad habit or I don't want to have good habits. They're just all habits. And then there might be habits you prefer and habits you'd like to get rid of.
Anthony Benenati 12:42
Right. I think in the context of the yoga conversation, yoga would simply ask, do your habits serve you? And that's another way to say it, right, whether it's good or bad, is it serving you?
Lesley Logan 12:54
Yes.
Anthony Benenati 12:55
So maybe at the end of the night, you've had a really shitty night and you need a drink, and most people would go, oh, my God, you teach yoga. You don't drink, right? There's another stereotype.
Lesley Logan 13:06
Yeah.
Anthony Benenati 13:07
But does that drink serve you in that moment? Is it going to control you? Is it going to take over? No. May it take the edge off and allow you to process the things that you're going through? Sure. Are there other ways to process it? Yes. But not everybody can just be like, you know what, I'm super stressed, and I'm just going to sit and meditate. That's not that's not realistic.
Lesley Logan 13:30
Yeah, yeah.
Anthony Benenati 13:31
It's not realistic for somebody, you have to meet people where they are, yeah, yeah, and make the changes gradually.
Lesley Logan 13:38
Well, I mean, do you have to meet yourself where you are?
Anthony Benenati 13:41
Well, yes. True.
Lesley Logan 13:44
That's a bigger, that's so huge. I just, you just mentioned something I thought it would be really good timing, like, since there is the stereotype of what yoga is, especially in the West, especially in big cities, oh, actually, even now, because the way things work in rural areas. It's just franchises so like so, what is yoga really?
Anthony Benenati 14:08
Okay. How long is this podcast?
Lesley Logan 14:11
We can have you back for another. We can split it up.
Anthony Benenati 14:13
Part two. On its most basic level, yoga is a practice. It's been, well, the iteration that we know as yoga today has only been around a couple of 100 years prior to that, prior to the last 5000 years with yoga, yoga has been a ritual, a path, a practice to transcend the known or the physical, to transcend it to, instead of saying I am my body, yogis back then would say, I am not my body. And then they would use the practice to try and extricate themselves from their body. So, a free soul, you can think of it that way, the soul that inhabits me is limited by this physical boundary, and I'm going to use the yoga practice to liberate myself from this physical, literally, prison, is how they thought of it. But things evolved, and as things do over hundreds and thousands of years, consciousness changes, and societies evolve, and mindsets change, and even language changes. So yoga now has become a physical practice to help the body and the mind connect. So there's a saying that if you keep the body to cool the mind, most people, they start thinking a lot when they stop doing. And that's why a lot of people are just doing all the time, do, do, do, do, do, and there's no room for thinking. And then when they stop doing, all of these thoughts start coming up, and they don't know how to deal with them, so they just start doing again. Which is, I guess, a way of pushing things down so that you don't have to deal with it.
Lesley Logan 16:05
Yeah, yeah.
Anthony Benenati 16:06
Yoga gives us a invitation to try something else. Iit's a, it's an invitation to be like, how does my body work? And how does it work better? And not for the sake of the practice itself, but how is it going to help my life? Even if you do yoga every day, let's just say you do 30 minutes of yoga every day. There's 23 and a half other hours. What else are you going to do? Hopefully your yoga practice is serving that.
Lesley Logan 16:37
Yeah, yeah. 30 minutes everyone is 2% of your day. If you want to do the math, it's 2% so if you can't give 2% of yourself to something that helps you become better, the other 98% like, I love that. I love the way that you described it. I think that it's really true. And I think it kind of like takes it away. Because I think people get caught up in the process of yoga, the poses, or the styles, and that's just all process which no one really, like, in the world of marketing guys, sells nothing. No one cares about the process. They care about the transformation, the the idea of like, you know, you said, like, breaking free of this limiting thing that would be like the thing, the promise. Let's go back. You, we kind of got, you got the ego kept you going to yoga. Why did you, like, did you know you wanted to be a teacher? Like, did you, I, because I had the same thing. I went to Pilates kicking and screaming, to be completely honest, and I thought it was a bullshit infomercial workout. And then I loved it, and then I kept going back, because I felt really good. And it wasn't till someone said I should be a teacher that I even thought about being a teacher. So how did you become a teacher? I mean, like, 32 years, take us back.
Anthony Benenati 17:46
That's exactly, that's exactly, right, it was my teacher at the time that had told me. He told me after class. Now this was, you know, maybe a year, year and a half into starting with him. But he said, you know, because we've had multiple conversations, not just in the classroom but outside, we'd go and have tea or whatever. And he goes, have you ever thought about teaching yoga? And I said, absolutely not. I mean, why would I? Why would I do that? I barely know the practice. He says, I understand that, and I can get you more information, but I see something in you that I think will help other people. And I think what he saw, and after teaching a whole bunch of teacher trainees myself, the most effectual teacher is someone who understands how people get to the practice. And what I mean by that is if, for instance, if I grew up in the yoga tradition and my parents were teachers, and I had been doing yoga all my life, and I never really understood the struggle of a tight body, of not being able to do the poses, of not understanding the language, of having no connection to yoga, whatsoever. Then I couldn't offer that to anybody else coming into the practice, because I would, I, some of the teachers that I train who are super flexible, for instance, they never understand what it's like not to be so it's hard to have empathy for the student that is having a very difficult time doing the most basic movement. And I think empathy is such an important factor to be a great teacher, you have to be able to put yourself in their shoes.
Lesley Logan 17:47
Yeah, yeah.
Anthony Benenati 17:47
Or barefoot as it, in the yoga studio.
Lesley Logan 17:47
Yeah, yeah. I agree. Like, I think, I think, you know, I used to be embarrassed by, like, how I thought so negatively about Pilates, and when I realized it was actually probably the way that made people trust to even try it out, like, I also thought it was bullshit. So, you know, I got it. And then the other thing, like, I do have one of those hypermobile bodies, but I fractured my tibial plateau right before I met and I remember, like, all this fear about, like, what that meant for my Pilates practice, what that meant for my weight training, my running, everything right? Was like, fear going on. And then I also realized in my own healing, how easy I was giving it to people with knee surgeries. Because I was just like, okay, like, don't move this in time thing and so I have an injury, I was like, oh, there's actually a lot of things they can do. There's like, so much like, and there's also so much they can't do, but like, you know, like, we don't have to, like, push them, but at the same token, like, we can challenge this body because it got injured for a reason. There was an imbalance, and that's why that happened.
Anthony Benenati 18:11
Correct, correct. And we're here to address that imbalance, right? A lot of times, yoga is translated as union, which is a very simple, and it's not a direct translation. The root word of yoga is actually thousands of years old, and it's yuj, Y-U-J and it means to yoke. Now this is an old fashioned term. You know the yoke when they used to yoke the horse to the cart or the ox to the cart.
Lesley Logan 21:02
I'm nodding, because I did do the Oregon Trail, and that is where I learned yoga.
Anthony Benenati 21:06
Okay, there you go. So that's the image that I want people to have here, and it's very important, because what you have, so yoga, at that point, becomes an action. It's a verb. It's not just a noun. What is it? But what is it doing? It's joining. But what is it joining? It's joining two different things, right? The cart and the horse. Now, alone, these two things serve purposes, don't they? But if you connect them, then you can do incredible things that neither one of these things could do by themselves. So in the yoga practice, we say one and one never equals two. It always equals three, because there's you, there's the thing, and then there's the thing you guys are creating. So it's you and Brad as individuals, and it's your marriage, which is a living entity. And it has a life of its own. And if you don't feed and nourish that third thing, not only will it die, but then you're broken apart again.
Lesley Logan 22:15
Yeah. Yeah. You should become a counselor as well.
Anthony Benenati 22:18
What do you think after class is about? When people feel comfortable with you, they come after class and then they start telling you about deeper issues, right, things that not the body, but the why, the why that they're here. Why are they struggling? Why are they having a hard time? I was actually listening to one of your previous podcast this morning, as we were taking me and my wife were taking a walk, Ashley, around the lake here, and we were listening, and it was the client, or the person you had on that had stage four cancer.
Lesley Logan 22:54
Oh, yeah.
Anthony Benenati 22:55
And I remember you said something, and it was very astute. You said that. Well, you didn't know how many, and I looked it up, we have about 60,000 thoughts a day, and you said about 95% of them are negative, right? And it's true. It's like we have these same repetitive thoughts all throughout the day, and the majority of them, the vast majority of them, are negative or repeat from the day before and the day before and the day before. And at what point do you start addressing this and start changing the narrative? Yoga is the invitation to start learning that you can that there is an issue first and then the tools to change them.
Lesley Logan 23:43
Yeah.
Anthony Benenati 23:45
So I love yoga as a verb, as an action, not just a thing like we can name it, and you can't just name it and make it yo. You can't just put goats in the room and call it yoga. It's not.
Lesley Logan 24:01
Yeah, I'm with you on that. I mean, like, because it's cute everyone and so don't at me. It is adorable, and if it gets people in, sure, but also, like, you're now paying attention to the goat, not you, which is like, another distraction that, you know, I think, like, I think, I think it's really easy, people want to distract themselves from all that's going on. Like, first of all, you've been a teacher since the 90s, so in L.A., which means use your studio was around during lots of things. Like, you know, I don't, I don't remember when, like, the riots were, if your studio is open, but then there was, like, 911 and.
Anthony Benenati 24:46
The riots werre '92 so it was just after I got here, so I opened the studio in '99 so 911 happened for us, and that was a remarkable time. Obviously, the next, Gulf War happened, and lots of other things. And, you know, the studio became a community. It became a place for people to go, even if they just wanted to sit and be in the room, let alone practice. I remember the practice after 911 people just wanted to sit and gather and cry and talk and rage and not move. They didn't want to move their bodies. They just needed community. They felt so detached.
Lesley Logan 25:24
Yeah. I mean, I wasn't any, I wasn't in a practice at the time, but I remember, because we were in California, so you're so removed, but you're not, you know? And so I can see how, like, your space can be that. And I think, like, it's so cool and also so big to have us to do a practice that can be so many things for people. It can be the community that they need, it could be the safe space that they share, and it can be a constant, like, it's there, no matter when things are good or when things are bad. And we don't have a lot of those things, right? Like, there's not there's not a lot of places or things you can do even when times are good and when times are bad, and I know you're gonna tell me good and bad, but like, you know, in the in the happier, joyful times versus, like, the sadder times.
Anthony Benenati 26:09
Right, now we're in a really difficult time, and we've been here before. 2008 we were here the last time this particular President was in office. We were here. And we go through these cycles, and they're not unlike other cycles throughout the history of life, and we will have more. And it's not always positive, it's not always happy, it's not always on the incline. Sometimes it takes a dip. And you and I both know that that's really where you're tested. You're tested in the dips. You're never tested when things are great, and you're never going to change when things are comfortable either. Change only happens when you're uncomfortable.
Lesley Logan 26:47
Yeah, it's really true. One of the my favorite things that you would bring up when we were in class is talking about, like, you know, you can't have love without hate, the equal opposite. And I was hoping you can, like, dive into that a little bit for us. Because I think, one, I actually think since these several moments of 2008 and 2016, and and now it's really easy for people to not see good and so it makes me go, like you guys, like you're seeing all the hate. Like, are you recognizing it's equal opposite. But I also, like, I think it's hard. I think people are always waiting for another shoe to drop, as opposed to, like, noticing when things are are also going well. But anyways, I wanted to know if you could, like, just share a little bit about that, because my listeners haven't heard that, and it was my favorite things. Like, Brad brought up your, like, Saturday morning classes today in a call with people, and he said, like, there'd be like, 50 people in this room, and you know, like you would often bring that up, and it was always around the same time that, like, something not great was going on. We all just felt it, whether it was in the city or the world. And like, you have to remind yourself of those things.
Anthony Benenati 27:53
It ties into the whole good and bad thing, because it's a reframing of thought. Like, you have to really reframe this idea that even, even if it's something that you don't like, it's serving something. So it's a basic function of physics, like, things wouldn't exist if it didn't have an opposite, right? You wouldn't know joy if you didn't know pain, you wouldn't know laughter if you didn't know sadness, you wouldn't have anything to reference it to. So your capacity to love is directly related to your capacity to hate, to feeling these negative, quote, negative feelings versus these positive. They're there to balance each other out, and it's the idea is that it's your choice which one you want to feed. You remember Star Wars, right? Think about the force. The force is this, is this neutral thing, and it's how you choose to use it. They were all using the same force. But the lesson was, am I going to use this to help empower and further and engage, or am I going to use this for selfish and personal and destructive reasons? Same energy, how do you use it? So rather than wasting your time on whether something is good or bad or right and wrong, it really serves you to think, is this serving me? Because, like you said earlier, at some point in your life, it served you, whether it was to keep you safe when you were a child, for instance, maybe you were in a really bad home life, and you learned coping mechanisms. You learn, for instance, maybe how to shut it out, right, and how to go into your own cave, which is, which is very easy for me to do. If things get too much, I tend to remove myself and go back into this little cave. Well, you can't do that when you're in relationship. Yeah. Well, you certainly can't do that for very long, right? You need tools like, yes, I need to go take 10 or 30 minutes to myself, but I'll be back. It's that communication, to let that other person know I'm not leaving you. I'm not not communicating with you, but I do need to take care of myself. So it's changing, the languaging around this. So it helps me to think, for instance, this bad time that we're having right now, it's temporary. Now, temporary may mean years.
Anthony Benenati 27:55
Yeah, I know I had a like, a thing, like, like, a little mantra card that's, everything, everything, everything is temporary. And I'm like, and temporary does not mean two seconds, two minutes, two weeks.
Anthony Benenati 30:02
Exactly. There is no time limit on temporary, but it will end. Things always do. Things always change, but it was helpful to me to look at kind of life in that different way. I wasn't raised like that. I was raised as a Catholic, so it was always guilt and shame and right and wrong and very linear thinking, very black and white thinking, very dualistic, instead of this idea that maybe it's not so black and white, maybe there is the gray. And I think we're all learning that extremism on either end is not the path. So, far right or far left, we're not going to get anywhere because we're isolating. We have to find a way to start communicating again and finding common ground and stop making other the problem.
Lesley Logan 31:41
Yeah, yeah.
Anthony Benenati 31:43
That's my that's my I think that goes on and off the mat. Don't look at your body as a bad thing. Don't look at it as something that you need to conquer or change, or that somehow there's something wrong with you. How can I enhance myself? How can I make me who I am, and everything that I am that may not be somebody else, but very unique to me. How can I make myself even better, a better version of me, not, not somebody else. I don't have to be somebody else. I just have to be the best me I can be.
Lesley Logan 32:18
Yeah. That makes me think of like, I interviewed a happiness strategist, and I was like, you know, I was like, this is interesting, because, like, like, can you be happy all the time? And she's like, well, of course not. She's like, like, she's like, she's like, but she said your ability to be happy is as directly related to how uncomfortable you can get, like, how comfortable withuncomfortable. You can get like, that's, can you like, what's your resilience? And she, you know, and I think, like, I think a lot of people have been outsourcing so long how they feel based on, like, what's going on out in the world, and not going back to like, how can I make myself the best version? Because we can affect the people around us more easily when you were talking about other it made me think you guys Google the Heineken commercial. It's quite long, but they literally took, like, people of opposite extremes and like, they took a guy who, like, voted against gay marriage, and then they took a lesbian and they put them in a room together, and they have to, like, build a desk, right? And like, and they, a table, or they build something. And the guy, like, this one guy is like, completely, I got this. I like, I can do these things, right? And she's like, and like, so they have to work together to build this thing. And like, each personal strengths have to do it, and then they have to sit down and have a beer. And at the end, the people who like when they interviewed them before they met the person they're building with, it would be like, I don't understand transgenders. I think they have to know rights, blah, blah, blah. And then they meet someone who's transgender, but they just built this desk together, and you watch this person go, well, let's have another drink and like, so it's really fascinating that, like, if we can actually stop, you know, being on the opposite sides, we can actually be together, and you get to know people, you're more likely to hear them and listen to them and realize we're kind of like what you think has been influenced by so much, by other people who are louder and you you actually love people who are around you more than you know, you know? And so I think that's what's so beautiful about a yoga class, or even Pilates classes, they can attract people from all sides of a spectrum and have a shared experience. And you know, because, and the more they get to know themselves, the more ideally, and this may be the idealist in me, like they think about caring for others, because they can, because once you've, once you've taken care of you, you actually have the capacity to actually care about other people.
Anthony Benenati 34:45
Oxygen mask, baby. It's all about putting on your oxygen mask, right? You got to put yours on first. You can't help anybody else if you're passed out. But I like what you said there, too, because Yoga does want to meet people where they're at. I remember, I had this woman in class. She always sat up front and in the beginning of class, at that time, we would chant the sound of om in the beginning of class, just to settle the class and get things going. And she would never chant, and that's fine. You don't have to, right? It's again, everything's an invitation. But she did come up to me after class one day, and we had a conversation, and I asked her why, and she says, well, you know, I'm a devout Jew, and I feel like I'm sort of disrespecting my tradition if I'm doing something I don't understand. And I said, well, I'm so glad that you brought that up. First of all, yoga doesn't care what you believe. You can believe you know, Orange is God, and you can still practice. Yoga doesn't require a belief, it just requires a willingness. And I said, well, you're a devout Jew, so what are you comfortable saying? And she said, well, shalom. And I said, Well, what's in the middle of shalom? And she said om. And I said, exactly. So from that point on, we would chant om, and she would chant shalom, and she would just hold the om. It, for some reason, it gave her permission. It was totally fine with everybody else, and then she felt included. That was a wonderful story.
Lesley Logan 36:19
I love that. I think also giving people permission, right? Like, I think that's what, you know, people can have permission to move their body, but also be in practice. Like, that's why it's called a yoga practice, and I think that's what it does so well, something that, like, I call it a Pilates practice, and there are a lot of people like me who call it practice, but there's also a lot of people who don't understand that, and they don't call it that, and they're like, I gotta get this. And it's like, no, what are you talking about, like, you're never gonna like, you don't get that. Like, it's your body. Your body's different every single day. Like, there are days like, at 6am I do Pilates, and at 8am I work out with you, and my body between those two hours is very different. And I'm like, whoa. I, what happened on my dog walk that this is no longer an option. I do, I do like that. Okay, I want to go into, because I think, like, you have had so many chapters in your yoga career, and what how you are, how you are teaching yoga now, is very different than what you did for the majority on your studio and things like that. Like we talk about some, be it till you see it moments and like, kind of like, what your what are you being till you see it, right now?
Anthony Benenati 37:20
You're right. I did go through a lot when you when you have a studio for that long, you know, you go through a lot of changes, including me and my original partner, we split, and then there was that moment where you had to decide who's going to fight for this, who's going to get the studio, because we both wanted it, and that was that was all about desire. Do you really want this? And how bad do you want it? And then after that, there were other things that came up every time you're being tested. And you will be tested no matter how committed you think you are to whatever it is that you think you want, you're going to continue to be tested. And it just is a way to reaffirm, do I really want to be it? Do I really want to do this? For me now, you're right. It is different. My body is different. My practice is different, and not in a bad or a good way, just different. This is the different body than it was when it was in my late 20s. Being it now is, for me, is really being about being authentic, being authentic to the moment, being authentic to my students, but really being authentic to my own inner voice. And every time I get on the mat, the first thing I tell my students is, listen, listen to your body. It's going to tell you something different today than it did yesterday. If you come onto the mat with an agenda, most of the time, you're going to be disappointed, because you don't know that your body's ready to do those things that day, that particular day, maybe you need something completely different than you thought. We have to be open to that. And then the day I decided that my time of studio ownership was over, that was a tough one. That was a really hard day. But the moment I decided to make that shift, I felt so much more freedom. Yoga had changed, you know, it really had become corporate. At this point, it was being completely watered down. People were barely doing teacher trainings and leading yoga classes, and it just became too much of a struggle to do the business of yoga versus being the teacher. You know, when you own your own business, you never are not working. That's the thing. It's 24/7 right? You don't get to clock out and go home and forget about it.
Lesley Logan 39:50
Yeah, there's a reason why I like, watch White Lotus. I'm like, because I'm not where I can't work and watch White Lotus like, this is me being awesome. That's how it serves me. Even if it, like, gives me a little stress and anxiety, I'm like, but I'm not working, so I get it, no, like, I mean, like, yeah, and then I I, I'm where I'm married to someone I work with. So it's never, it's never off. Yeah, but I, thank you for sharing that, because, I mean, like, I think a lot of people, there's an aspiration to start something or do something or own something. But as you said, you've evolved. Not only has yoga evolved, but you've evolved. Your body has changed. And I think sometimes we forget that as we evolve, we outgrow some roles, you know, and like, just like you outgrow clothes, like you outgrow, like you outgrow a role, and it's like owning a studio serves such a good purpose, like a good purpose at the time, like you had a partner and a family and, like all these things. And then it also got to a place where it's like all this is changing, and I have, too, you know, but that's so hard to like, because it's like a light switch.
Anthony Benenati 40:58
Yeah. Well, you know, I had felt it, but not really paid attention to it. And you know how your body does, your body will jump in there and it'll call your attention. And I literally had my one and only panic attack at that moment. It was like, oh yeah, this is a sign you are not in a good place. This, this, this, it's time to get out. It's time this, this had run its course. And that was a hard decision to really give up the thing that you worked so hard to create. But it was also learning that that was separate from who I was, that we were not inextricably connected, that we were these individual things, and we did create a third thing, but that third thing was dying, and it was time to change into something else.
Lesley Logan 41:46
Yeah, yeah. What are you most excited about right now?
Anthony Benenati 41:51
Oh my gosh, we are empty nesters. That's the most, 25 years of being a parent.
Lesley Logan 41:59
I had someone I just interviewed. She's like, I'm a bird launcher. She's like, I've launched all my birds. They're all birds. They're all launched. Like, the positive of that.
Anthony Benenati 42:10
It is so true. We are so excited about this next chapter for us, which is freedom in a lot of different ways, right? I mean, you're never not the parent, but they don't need you every day anymore. They need you when they need you and and happy to be there when they do. Like this morning, my youngest called from college, and she stayed on the phone for over an hour. And she just needed feedback. She needed to connect. She didn't necessarily need a ton of advice. She just, you could feel that she needed connection. For now, for me, it really is about this next chapter. Your lives are a bunch of chapters, and at being, you know, 50, I'll be 58 this year. It's a very I know, right? Yeah, I can't believe it myself, but this idea now that I can make choices solely for me or solely for us as a couple and not oh my god, what are we going to do with the kids, and is this child going to come? Or are they not going to come, or are we going to do this all together, that we can make these choices for ourselves, I'm really excited about that. That's the personal aspect of it. Professionally, professionally, things have changed, you know, ever since covid, everybody went online, and which is great. It's a great way to connect to everybody, but I still feel the need to be in the classroom, yeah, and we do those in persons, and we do those yoga retreats, and we do those monthly workshops, just so that people can have that feeling of connection and community again.
Lesley Logan 43:52
Yeah, I think that's why we do our tours, too. Like, I love being online, because I can impact people without having to travel as much. And also, like, I need to see bodies in three dimensions.
Anthony Benenati 44:03
Right. How do you make an adjustment with you can't see and touch?
Lesley Logan 44:06
No, I'm literally going so if I was there, I would hold your arms still. Imagine I'm like, is your child around? Can they grab your arms and hold them? Hold their hold their arms. Okay. Now go.
Anthony Benenati 44:18
That's so good.
Lesley Logan 44:19
You know, but like, I think, I think that's why, like, I like the idea of, like, really reframing what's good or bad. Because, like, I think it could be so easy, like, back before the pandemic, like, oh, online is terrible. You can't have those things. But we, Brad and I used to, like, call you just be on the phone. Because I was like, I can't handle the traffic. I can't but I want you. So just, just be on just be on speakerphone, and we'll mute ourselves, and we'll be, you know, but like, when the pandemic happened, I was like, oh, I love this, because now I can have access to the people, I don't live in the same town as you, and I, Brad and I still get to have that practice with you, and I think, but also, yeah, we miss, like, actual hugs and actually seeing people, and you have to be more intentional. But I think that that, I think then we are more intentional, you know, so that is also cool.
Anthony Benenati 45:08
Yeah, we really mourned the day you guys left.
Lesley Logan 45:12
When we moved from L.A. to Las Vegas was during the pandemic, and we didn't actually have a mourning, because nothing was actually happening in person, the more like it was a year and a half later when things opened back up and we were not part of the opening back up that was like, so it was a delayed mourning, a delayed grief for us. Okay, obviously, we're gonna all catch up, guys. We're gonna take a brief break, find out how people can find you, follow you, do yoga with you.
Anthony Benenati 45:39
Great.
Lesley Logan 45:40
All right, Anthony, where do you hang out? Like, are you on the Instagram? Or is there just a simpler way? How can people do yoga with you or learn more about what you're doing? Where do you where can they go?
Anthony Benenati 45:52
Well, they can go to my website, which is, thatsnotyoga.com and of course, there's a story behind that, because that's a pretty bold statement, which was intentional. One of the misconceptions about yoga is that anything goes, right, and that is so far from the truth. If yoga is about anything, it's about setting meaningful boundaries. So if you take a bunch of energy and you narrow it, you're going to increase the flow of that energy. Just think of water. Take a lake. Narrow the boundaries. It becomes a river. Narrow the boundaries even more, becomes a raging river. So most people think that if you limit their choices, then you're limiting their freedom. But I call it the Cheesecake Factory theory. Walk into a Cheesecake Factory and you sit down, and they literally throw you down a book. And they're like, okay, what do you want? And you can have anything. The book is like, an inch thick. And I just get overloaded because there's too many choices. I much prefer to go to a restaurant where they just print the menu that day and there's six things on it, and you can have this, this or this, and I'm like, great, I'll have that. The narrowing of your choices actually gives you more freedom, because you're constantly saying no to a bunch of things while you're saying yes to a limited amount of things, right? Like being in marriage, you're saying yes to Brad and no to everybody else. It's this process that continues throughout your entire day, right? What am I letting in? What am I consciously keeping away? I love that understanding.
Lesley Logan 47:42
I love that. So you guys just so you know, because he didn't say it, but I'm gonna say it for him. Brad and I can do yoga online with this man. You do it three times a week. I try to show up twice a week when I'm there. And Brad, we're getting him on the 8 am wake up call. We're working on. Do you remember? Do you remember when he used to do it 6 am? I think we have to remind him that he used to do 6 am yoga.
Anthony Benenati 48:03
Absolutely.
Lesley Logan 48:03
When the bed was further away from the studio was the the thing. So you guys can do that. You can find that on, on, thatsnot yoga.com. You kind of just gave us a Be It Action Item. But I just want to see like, if there's any other bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted steps people can take to be it till they see it.
Anthony Benenati 48:18
Okay. The the, the the triad, the triumvirate that we like to follow in the practice, is desire, knowledge, action. Those are my Be It moments. To break it down, you got to want to do something, then you have to learn how to do it, and then you do it, this whole idea of just do it, that's not going to work. Just doing something without knowing how to do it can cause you harm doing something and you don't have the real desire to do it, you're not going to put your best effort in. If you do those three things in that order, you can pretty much do whatever you want to do. You've got to want to do it. You got to learn how to do it, and then you simply have to do it, and you have to commit to doing it over and over and over again to create that meaningful change. Those are my action items. And the thing is, is, if you don't want to do it, don't do it. That's the thing. You're, exactly, more freedom. And that's whole, that's yoga's goal. Yoga just wants you to be more free. But that doesn't mean no boundaries. It means establishing meaningful boundaries, boundaries that are going to channel you in the direction you want to go. And guess what, people, you can always change your mind. You can always change your mind.
Lesley Logan 49:48
I mean, that is like that needs to be on people's walls. Because I find like, you know, like, imagine if you never gave yourself permission to change your mind. You might, you might, the world might have lost a yoga teacher that day, because you would have had a panic attack and then a burnout, you know, like, you can change your mind on your schedule, you can change your mind on your goals. You can change your mind on lot of things, like, you know, and that is for the perfectionist, listening. That might be the hardest thing you learn.
Anthony Benenati 50:14
I'm speaking to you, perfectionist.
Lesley Logan 50:17
Yeah, oh my gosh, Anthony, obviously I could talk to you for hours. And clearly Brad is like itching to walk in this room, you guys, so we gotta let him in so you can say hi to his friend, but thank you for being here, and thank you for just sharing so much of your wisdom. I continue to learn from you. Always. I can't wait to learn more. Someday we're gonna do a joint Pilates, yoga. That is my dream. That is my vision. Maybe on the Summer Tour. Maybe you'll be our L.A. event. So see, you guys, let us know what your favorite takeaways were. Let Anthony know in thatsnotyoga. Let the Be It Pod know and share this with a friend who needs to hear it, because that's how everyone wins. You know, we all can take away something from this, and I'd love to hear what yours are, and you know what to do, until next time, Be It Till You See It.
Lesley Logan 51:02
That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.
Brad Crowell 51:41
It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.
Lesley Logan 51:46
It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.
Brad Crowell 51:50
Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.
Lesley Logan 51:58
Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.
Brad Crowell 52:01
Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.
Lesley Logan 52:14
I'm interviewing Anthony.
Anthony Benenati 52:15
Hi, Brad.
Lesley Logan 52:16
Yeah, it's an interview right now. No, we're not done. You're just interrupting. We'll put this in the bloopers. He's come in twice, and I'm like, um.
Anthony Benenati 52:24
What's up, buddy?
Brad Crowell 52:26
I wanted to say hi.
Lesley Logan 52:27
Yeah. Okay, alright, one second, let me get to those Be It Action Items. Okay. We'll talk.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai
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Anthony Benenati, founder of City Yoga and That’s Not Yoga®, shares his personal evolution from his earliest experiences with yoga to developing a practice that meets each individual where they are. In this conversation, he explores breaking limiting ideas about yoga, uncovering its deeper meaning, and building genuine human connection through mindful movement. He also reflects on how curiosity, learning, and purposeful steps can lead to lasting change. This is a conversation about healing, empowerment, and finding a practice that truly serves you.
If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] mailto:[email protected].
And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.
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Guest Bio:
Anthony Benenati is the founder of City Yoga, The first Anusara yoga studio in California and That's Not Yoga® , a culmination of three decades of study and practice in the Hatha Yoga tradition. Anthony’s philosophy is simple; fit the yoga to the student, not the student to the yoga. He believes that it isn’t about the style of yoga you practice, rather, the effectiveness of that style for your body. Yoga practice should help you transform, not cause more suffering.
Anthony draws from a deep knowledge of the different classical styles of modern yoga and other modalities to construct a path of healing and transformation for their student. Anthony has trained in Kundalini, Ashtanga, Iyengar, Anusara and Viniyoga. He specializes in Yoga Therapeutics and tailors the practice so your body uses its natural movements to heal itself from pain and suffering. He has taught globally and has trained thousands of students.
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Episode Transcript:
Anthony Benenati 0:00
One of the misconceptions about yoga is that anything goes, right, and that is so far from the truth. If yoga is about anything, it's about setting meaningful boundaries.
Lesley Logan 0:12
Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.
Lesley Logan 0:51
All right, Be It babe. I am so stoked for you to hear today's interview. Our guest today is actually a dear friend of Brad and mine, and he is a person we have quoted on the podcast before, and he's someone we said, we have to get him on the pod. And guess what? We did it. And also, I can't believe this is the first time he's on the pod. I feel like he'll be a regular conversation, because it's just really fun to hear him share his perspective, and he is an amazing yoga teacher. And this is as much of a yoga podcast as it's not a yoga podcast episode, because we talk a lot about what really is yoga, and what does it mean to have a yoga practice, and what is it trying to teach us? And if you think you know what yoga is I'm gonna challenge you to listen, because I think it's really easy for us to have been fed something that it's not and then not realize, like, the amazing benefits that it has. And so I'm not gonna say anymore, because this episode is just one of my favorite it's gonna go hands down and one I'll quote in the future. And I knew that when I brought him on, I just knew that we would have an amazing conversation, and this is hopefully going to entertain, educate and inspire you. So here is Anthony Benenati.
Lesley Logan 2:09
All right, Be It babe, I'm really excited. This person is actually a dear friend, like I know I've said that about some guests, but usually they're a dear friend of like, a couple moments. This person I've known for like, 10 years, and Brad has known him much longer, he's been a regular in our lives. Anthony Benenati, you are one of the best yoga teachers I know, but also so much more than that. Can you tell everyone who you are and what you rock at?
Anthony Benenati 2:33
Well, first of all, thank you for having me on. What an honor. Who am I? Anthony Benenati, you said my name. I am, believe it or not, a yoga teacher, a professional yoga teacher. I've been doing this for 32 years now, which, when I tell people that I teach yoga, they they have immediate this vision of what that might be.
Lesley Logan 2:56
Yes, you should be in white.
Anthony Benenati 2:59
I should be in white or.
Lesley Logan 3:02
With a glow.
Anthony Benenati 3:04
It's not very serious or, right? Everybody has their assumptions of what yoga is, which, my job is to help educate and instruct on what the practice truly is versus what it has become. The practice that sort of everybody knows now, versus really, what it truly is and what its goal is.
Lesley Logan 3:29
Yeah, I feel like we could also, like, talk about that for hours, because I had someone send me a reel of a guy on a Reformer with a, like, stationary bike in his hands and feet. And it was a joke. It was like an April Fool's joke. And he was like, okay, guys like, this class, we get cardio and core and like, he's holding the bike, he's it's obviously a joke. But like someone sent it to me, and I'm like, the fact that this is so hilarious that people who've never done Pilates before are sending this to me, tells me that what people think Pilates is has strayed far from what Pilates is. So I feel like I can understand that. And I find myself constantly educating people a little bit like, well, that yes, those are Pilates exercises and so, but it's not the inherent reality of it is. And so I feel like I understand that plight, that that journey you're on, in a little bit.
Anthony Benenati 4:18
You and I have had this conversation many times before, because you're so close to the source of it, and and that's what I love about what you do, what you teach, and where I am, and what I teach, is that there's a lineage, and you're very close to the source, and the closer you are to the source, the more authentic the teaching, the further down the line you get disconnected from that core source. Then everything starts to get watered down and miscommunicated. Lots of stuff gets forgotten.
Lesley Logan 4:55
Yeah, well, it's like the game of telephone, like, I mean, like when you play that game in school, like, you, the further it goes down the line.
Anthony Benenati 5:03
The more warped it gets.
Lesley Logan 5:04
Yes, yes. And it's funny, but also, like, that is the reality. Can we take a step back? Because, like, a yoga instructor of 32 years, that is a long time. And I think, like, there's not many of you. I mean, there's many of you, probably in India places, but like, there's not many of people who've had that many decades and and have studied the way that you have like, did you grow up like doing yoga? Did you want to be a yoga teacher?
Anthony Benenati 5:32
No, this story is, is pretty remarkable. No, I did not grow up with yoga. In fact, I didn't really understand what yoga was until I was literally introduced to it after I moved here to L.A. So I've been in L.A. since 1991 before that, I was in the military. I was in the Air Force. And when I was in the Air Force, I was a competitive power lifter, and I played sports all my life. So my body was pretty wrecked in my 20s. I had a shoulder surgery and a knee surgery already, and I remember I was waiting tables, and I had met this girl, and I was taken by the way she sort of carried herself. She was she walked very upright, almost Royal. And I thought, you know, it's L.A., everyone's moving to LA to become an actress. And I thought, okay, this girl, right, she's like telling her family, I don't want your money, I'm moving to L.A. and I'm going to be an actress. So I asked her, and she laughed in my face, and she lifted up the back of her shirt, and she showed me a 13-inch scar on her spine. And she told me that when she was young, she had this incredible S curve in her back, and she was in a full body cast from her neck all the way down through her torso. And I said, oh, my God, that that sounds painful. And I said how do you move? You can't, I haven't seen you bend. She goes, I can't. The only thing I can bend is my hips. I can turn my hips, but I cannot bend my back. I said, well, what do you do for relief? And she said, I do yoga. And I was like, Well, explain what's that and how does that help you? And she said, I'd love to explain it, but I don't think I can. Why don't you just come to a class? So I did, and you know, me then, I was really big. I had all this muscle mass, right? And I went to my first class, and I could not finish, could not finish the class. It kicked my butt. And I was so, my ego got, got triggered. And one of the things that's important for me as a teacher now when I teach my students is that there is, yoga doesn't see things in good and bad. Yoga see thing, sees things in does it work or not? And at the time, ego served me, because it made me go back, and it made me go back and it made me go back. At the time, the reasons because I think I was going to get it, and that's fine for whatever, for whatever reason someone enters into the practice is fine, you're there. That's the important part. We can work on the why and the why always evolves as you get along through the practice. But for me, I tell people, ego brought me to yoga and it it kept me there.
Lesley Logan 8:34
Yeah, I think, isn't it interesting, like, because I'll have I work with teachers, and they're like, oh, I don't want to work with people who want to lose weight. And I'm like, I, you don't have to promise them anything you can't do. But if, if that brought them into the space, I would much rather you a non like someone who's not going to manipulate or use them or lie to them to be the safe landing for them to find a movement practice that can help them love the body that they have, you know? So I'm not here to be I won't take you if you want to lose weight. I'll just say, here's the science of weight loss, here's how I can fit in and and here's how I don't, you know, but this is what we can do together and like building that trust. And if that's what brought them in, and that's what got them to keep coming at the beginning, but then they stay coming because of how it makes them feel, and then they become a person who doesn't worry about that, because they actually care more about how they feel than how that what the scale says. Like, to me, that's kind of like that same thing. Like, I think too often people are wanting to turn away that negative energy, that negative energy in air quotes, because that's not what something is. But really it's like, you can't just, you don't, we don't get to decide how people come to us.
Anthony Benenati 9:48
Right.
Lesley Logan 9:49
All we can do is like, kind of be a space for them to evolve and learn the what, what, what they wanted, what they're here, what we can teach them.
Anthony Benenati 9:57
Yeah, I'm glad that you said that. I'm glad that you said that to create the space, because that's exactly what it is, isn't it? It's like we want to create a safe space for them to explore them, and not come in with this bunch of judgment that I'm putting on to them so that they feel uncomfortable. I want them to feel as comfortable as they can. Starting anything new is difficult. We all know that. Let's not make it harder.
Lesley Logan 10:22
Yeah, yeah. I also like that you said there's like, there's not bad or good.
Anthony Benenati 10:28
That's a radical, that's a radical idea for people. In the West, we are programmed this is good and this is bad. I can even hear, you probably hear this in your students' languages too. Oh, that's my bad side, or I have a bad leg, or I have a bad shoulder. And I'm careful with that, careful with the languaging. It's not bad. It may be injured, it may be weaker, it may be tighter, but that doesn't mean it's bad.
Lesley Logan 10:55
Yeah. And I, well, I, there was a years ago, like years ago. I can remember where I was driving, but I can't remember the name of the podcast, I was in traffic on San Vicente trying to get to Wilson Boulevard, and I was listening this podcast, and they talked about how, like, we have to be mindful of how we talk about our body, because our body is listening. And they have done studies that, if you like, say, I gained weight, I'm someone who can't lose weight, like, I I'm fat. All this your bod, those people who say that they actually have seen that they produce fat cells, like, that's what they do, right? Versus like, they also, like, told people, like, oh, you had this knee surgery. And the person goes, oh, I had knee surgery, so my knee is better. They didn't have knee surgery. They literally didn't give it to them. They just pretended they put them under they had controls, don't worry there's other things, but.
Anthony Benenati 11:42
The placebo effect.
Lesley Logan 11:44
What you tell your body like really does matter and and I studied with BJ Fogg, who's the found who wrote Tiny Habits, and he's really the leading scientist on habits that everybody has been stealing from and, not stealing, it's the wrong word, they probably study with them, but at any rate, he said there's no such thing as a bad or good habit. Everything serves you. Every like the habits you don't like about yourself, if you don't like that you scroll on the internet. If you don't like that you binge-watch NetFlix that they'll all the habits we have serve us, they provide something because your brain actually doesn't want to be around anything that causes judgment or shame. So it, it's seeking, like, oh, like, maybe it's comfortable for you to it's soothing to just binge out and watch something you get you get to avoid the other thoughts you have, or with certainty, which we all are looking for and and so he said, If you so, you can't ever say I have a bad habit or I don't want to have good habits. They're just all habits. And then there might be habits you prefer and habits you'd like to get rid of.
Anthony Benenati 12:42
Right. I think in the context of the yoga conversation, yoga would simply ask, do your habits serve you? And that's another way to say it, right, whether it's good or bad, is it serving you?
Lesley Logan 12:54
Yes.
Anthony Benenati 12:55
So maybe at the end of the night, you've had a really shitty night and you need a drink, and most people would go, oh, my God, you teach yoga. You don't drink, right? There's another stereotype.
Lesley Logan 13:06
Yeah.
Anthony Benenati 13:07
But does that drink serve you in that moment? Is it going to control you? Is it going to take over? No. May it take the edge off and allow you to process the things that you're going through? Sure. Are there other ways to process it? Yes. But not everybody can just be like, you know what, I'm super stressed, and I'm just going to sit and meditate. That's not that's not realistic.
Lesley Logan 13:30
Yeah, yeah.
Anthony Benenati 13:31
It's not realistic for somebody, you have to meet people where they are, yeah, yeah, and make the changes gradually.
Lesley Logan 13:38
Well, I mean, do you have to meet yourself where you are?
Anthony Benenati 13:41
Well, yes. True.
Lesley Logan 13:44
That's a bigger, that's so huge. I just, you just mentioned something I thought it would be really good timing, like, since there is the stereotype of what yoga is, especially in the West, especially in big cities, oh, actually, even now, because the way things work in rural areas. It's just franchises so like so, what is yoga really?
Anthony Benenati 14:08
Okay. How long is this podcast?
Lesley Logan 14:11
We can have you back for another. We can split it up.
Anthony Benenati 14:13
Part two. On its most basic level, yoga is a practice. It's been, well, the iteration that we know as yoga today has only been around a couple of 100 years prior to that, prior to the last 5000 years with yoga, yoga has been a ritual, a path, a practice to transcend the known or the physical, to transcend it to, instead of saying I am my body, yogis back then would say, I am not my body. And then they would use the practice to try and extricate themselves from their body. So, a free soul, you can think of it that way, the soul that inhabits me is limited by this physical boundary, and I'm going to use the yoga practice to liberate myself from this physical, literally, prison, is how they thought of it. But things evolved, and as things do over hundreds and thousands of years, consciousness changes, and societies evolve, and mindsets change, and even language changes. So yoga now has become a physical practice to help the body and the mind connect. So there's a saying that if you keep the body to cool the mind, most people, they start thinking a lot when they stop doing. And that's why a lot of people are just doing all the time, do, do, do, do, do, and there's no room for thinking. And then when they stop doing, all of these thoughts start coming up, and they don't know how to deal with them, so they just start doing again. Which is, I guess, a way of pushing things down so that you don't have to deal with it.
Lesley Logan 16:05
Yeah, yeah.
Anthony Benenati 16:06
Yoga gives us a invitation to try something else. Iit's a, it's an invitation to be like, how does my body work? And how does it work better? And not for the sake of the practice itself, but how is it going to help my life? Even if you do yoga every day, let's just say you do 30 minutes of yoga every day. There's 23 and a half other hours. What else are you going to do? Hopefully your yoga practice is serving that.
Lesley Logan 16:37
Yeah, yeah. 30 minutes everyone is 2% of your day. If you want to do the math, it's 2% so if you can't give 2% of yourself to something that helps you become better, the other 98% like, I love that. I love the way that you described it. I think that it's really true. And I think it kind of like takes it away. Because I think people get caught up in the process of yoga, the poses, or the styles, and that's just all process which no one really, like, in the world of marketing guys, sells nothing. No one cares about the process. They care about the transformation, the the idea of like, you know, you said, like, breaking free of this limiting thing that would be like the thing, the promise. Let's go back. You, we kind of got, you got the ego kept you going to yoga. Why did you, like, did you know you wanted to be a teacher? Like, did you, I, because I had the same thing. I went to Pilates kicking and screaming, to be completely honest, and I thought it was a bullshit infomercial workout. And then I loved it, and then I kept going back, because I felt really good. And it wasn't till someone said I should be a teacher that I even thought about being a teacher. So how did you become a teacher? I mean, like, 32 years, take us back.
Anthony Benenati 17:46
That's exactly, that's exactly, right, it was my teacher at the time that had told me. He told me after class. Now this was, you know, maybe a year, year and a half into starting with him. But he said, you know, because we've had multiple conversations, not just in the classroom but outside, we'd go and have tea or whatever. And he goes, have you ever thought about teaching yoga? And I said, absolutely not. I mean, why would I? Why would I do that? I barely know the practice. He says, I understand that, and I can get you more information, but I see something in you that I think will help other people. And I think what he saw, and after teaching a whole bunch of teacher trainees myself, the most effectual teacher is someone who understands how people get to the practice. And what I mean by that is if, for instance, if I grew up in the yoga tradition and my parents were teachers, and I had been doing yoga all my life, and I never really understood the struggle of a tight body, of not being able to do the poses, of not understanding the language, of having no connection to yoga, whatsoever. Then I couldn't offer that to anybody else coming into the practice, because I would, I, some of the teachers that I train who are super flexible, for instance, they never understand what it's like not to be so it's hard to have empathy for the student that is having a very difficult time doing the most basic movement. And I think empathy is such an important factor to be a great teacher, you have to be able to put yourself in their shoes.
Lesley Logan 17:47
Yeah, yeah.
Anthony Benenati 17:47
Or barefoot as it, in the yoga studio.
Lesley Logan 17:47
Yeah, yeah. I agree. Like, I think, I think, you know, I used to be embarrassed by, like, how I thought so negatively about Pilates, and when I realized it was actually probably the way that made people trust to even try it out, like, I also thought it was bullshit. So, you know, I got it. And then the other thing, like, I do have one of those hypermobile bodies, but I fractured my tibial plateau right before I met and I remember, like, all this fear about, like, what that meant for my Pilates practice, what that meant for my weight training, my running, everything right? Was like, fear going on. And then I also realized in my own healing, how easy I was giving it to people with knee surgeries. Because I was just like, okay, like, don't move this in time thing and so I have an injury, I was like, oh, there's actually a lot of things they can do. There's like, so much like, and there's also so much they can't do, but like, you know, like, we don't have to, like, push them, but at the same token, like, we can challenge this body because it got injured for a reason. There was an imbalance, and that's why that happened.
Anthony Benenati 18:11
Correct, correct. And we're here to address that imbalance, right? A lot of times, yoga is translated as union, which is a very simple, and it's not a direct translation. The root word of yoga is actually thousands of years old, and it's yuj, Y-U-J and it means to yoke. Now this is an old fashioned term. You know the yoke when they used to yoke the horse to the cart or the ox to the cart.
Lesley Logan 21:02
I'm nodding, because I did do the Oregon Trail, and that is where I learned yoga.
Anthony Benenati 21:06
Okay, there you go. So that's the image that I want people to have here, and it's very important, because what you have, so yoga, at that point, becomes an action. It's a verb. It's not just a noun. What is it? But what is it doing? It's joining. But what is it joining? It's joining two different things, right? The cart and the horse. Now, alone, these two things serve purposes, don't they? But if you connect them, then you can do incredible things that neither one of these things could do by themselves. So in the yoga practice, we say one and one never equals two. It always equals three, because there's you, there's the thing, and then there's the thing you guys are creating. So it's you and Brad as individuals, and it's your marriage, which is a living entity. And it has a life of its own. And if you don't feed and nourish that third thing, not only will it die, but then you're broken apart again.
Lesley Logan 22:15
Yeah. Yeah. You should become a counselor as well.
Anthony Benenati 22:18
What do you think after class is about? When people feel comfortable with you, they come after class and then they start telling you about deeper issues, right, things that not the body, but the why, the why that they're here. Why are they struggling? Why are they having a hard time? I was actually listening to one of your previous podcast this morning, as we were taking me and my wife were taking a walk, Ashley, around the lake here, and we were listening, and it was the client, or the person you had on that had stage four cancer.
Lesley Logan 22:54
Oh, yeah.
Anthony Benenati 22:55
And I remember you said something, and it was very astute. You said that. Well, you didn't know how many, and I looked it up, we have about 60,000 thoughts a day, and you said about 95% of them are negative, right? And it's true. It's like we have these same repetitive thoughts all throughout the day, and the majority of them, the vast majority of them, are negative or repeat from the day before and the day before and the day before. And at what point do you start addressing this and start changing the narrative? Yoga is the invitation to start learning that you can that there is an issue first and then the tools to change them.
Lesley Logan 23:43
Yeah.
Anthony Benenati 23:45
So I love yoga as a verb, as an action, not just a thing like we can name it, and you can't just name it and make it yo. You can't just put goats in the room and call it yoga. It's not.
Lesley Logan 24:01
Yeah, I'm with you on that. I mean, like, because it's cute everyone and so don't at me. It is adorable, and if it gets people in, sure, but also, like, you're now paying attention to the goat, not you, which is like, another distraction that, you know, I think, like, I think, I think it's really easy, people want to distract themselves from all that's going on. Like, first of all, you've been a teacher since the 90s, so in L.A., which means use your studio was around during lots of things. Like, you know, I don't, I don't remember when, like, the riots were, if your studio is open, but then there was, like, 911 and.
Anthony Benenati 24:46
The riots werre '92 so it was just after I got here, so I opened the studio in '99 so 911 happened for us, and that was a remarkable time. Obviously, the next, Gulf War happened, and lots of other things. And, you know, the studio became a community. It became a place for people to go, even if they just wanted to sit and be in the room, let alone practice. I remember the practice after 911 people just wanted to sit and gather and cry and talk and rage and not move. They didn't want to move their bodies. They just needed community. They felt so detached.
Lesley Logan 25:24
Yeah. I mean, I wasn't any, I wasn't in a practice at the time, but I remember, because we were in California, so you're so removed, but you're not, you know? And so I can see how, like, your space can be that. And I think, like, it's so cool and also so big to have us to do a practice that can be so many things for people. It can be the community that they need, it could be the safe space that they share, and it can be a constant, like, it's there, no matter when things are good or when things are bad. And we don't have a lot of those things, right? Like, there's not there's not a lot of places or things you can do even when times are good and when times are bad, and I know you're gonna tell me good and bad, but like, you know, in the in the happier, joyful times versus, like, the sadder times.
Anthony Benenati 26:09
Right, now we're in a really difficult time, and we've been here before. 2008 we were here the last time this particular President was in office. We were here. And we go through these cycles, and they're not unlike other cycles throughout the history of life, and we will have more. And it's not always positive, it's not always happy, it's not always on the incline. Sometimes it takes a dip. And you and I both know that that's really where you're tested. You're tested in the dips. You're never tested when things are great, and you're never going to change when things are comfortable either. Change only happens when you're uncomfortable.
Lesley Logan 26:47
Yeah, it's really true. One of the my favorite things that you would bring up when we were in class is talking about, like, you know, you can't have love without hate, the equal opposite. And I was hoping you can, like, dive into that a little bit for us. Because I think, one, I actually think since these several moments of 2008 and 2016, and and now it's really easy for people to not see good and so it makes me go, like you guys, like you're seeing all the hate. Like, are you recognizing it's equal opposite. But I also, like, I think it's hard. I think people are always waiting for another shoe to drop, as opposed to, like, noticing when things are are also going well. But anyways, I wanted to know if you could, like, just share a little bit about that, because my listeners haven't heard that, and it was my favorite things. Like, Brad brought up your, like, Saturday morning classes today in a call with people, and he said, like, there'd be like, 50 people in this room, and you know, like you would often bring that up, and it was always around the same time that, like, something not great was going on. We all just felt it, whether it was in the city or the world. And like, you have to remind yourself of those things.
Anthony Benenati 27:53
It ties into the whole good and bad thing, because it's a reframing of thought. Like, you have to really reframe this idea that even, even if it's something that you don't like, it's serving something. So it's a basic function of physics, like, things wouldn't exist if it didn't have an opposite, right? You wouldn't know joy if you didn't know pain, you wouldn't know laughter if you didn't know sadness, you wouldn't have anything to reference it to. So your capacity to love is directly related to your capacity to hate, to feeling these negative, quote, negative feelings versus these positive. They're there to balance each other out, and it's the idea is that it's your choice which one you want to feed. You remember Star Wars, right? Think about the force. The force is this, is this neutral thing, and it's how you choose to use it. They were all using the same force. But the lesson was, am I going to use this to help empower and further and engage, or am I going to use this for selfish and personal and destructive reasons? Same energy, how do you use it? So rather than wasting your time on whether something is good or bad or right and wrong, it really serves you to think, is this serving me? Because, like you said earlier, at some point in your life, it served you, whether it was to keep you safe when you were a child, for instance, maybe you were in a really bad home life, and you learned coping mechanisms. You learn, for instance, maybe how to shut it out, right, and how to go into your own cave, which is, which is very easy for me to do. If things get too much, I tend to remove myself and go back into this little cave. Well, you can't do that when you're in relationship. Yeah. Well, you certainly can't do that for very long, right? You need tools like, yes, I need to go take 10 or 30 minutes to myself, but I'll be back. It's that communication, to let that other person know I'm not leaving you. I'm not not communicating with you, but I do need to take care of myself. So it's changing, the languaging around this. So it helps me to think, for instance, this bad time that we're having right now, it's temporary. Now, temporary may mean years.
Anthony Benenati 27:55
Yeah, I know I had a like, a thing, like, like, a little mantra card that's, everything, everything, everything is temporary. And I'm like, and temporary does not mean two seconds, two minutes, two weeks.
Anthony Benenati 30:02
Exactly. There is no time limit on temporary, but it will end. Things always do. Things always change, but it was helpful to me to look at kind of life in that different way. I wasn't raised like that. I was raised as a Catholic, so it was always guilt and shame and right and wrong and very linear thinking, very black and white thinking, very dualistic, instead of this idea that maybe it's not so black and white, maybe there is the gray. And I think we're all learning that extremism on either end is not the path. So, far right or far left, we're not going to get anywhere because we're isolating. We have to find a way to start communicating again and finding common ground and stop making other the problem.
Lesley Logan 31:41
Yeah, yeah.
Anthony Benenati 31:43
That's my that's my I think that goes on and off the mat. Don't look at your body as a bad thing. Don't look at it as something that you need to conquer or change, or that somehow there's something wrong with you. How can I enhance myself? How can I make me who I am, and everything that I am that may not be somebody else, but very unique to me. How can I make myself even better, a better version of me, not, not somebody else. I don't have to be somebody else. I just have to be the best me I can be.
Lesley Logan 32:18
Yeah. That makes me think of like, I interviewed a happiness strategist, and I was like, you know, I was like, this is interesting, because, like, like, can you be happy all the time? And she's like, well, of course not. She's like, like, she's like, she's like, but she said your ability to be happy is as directly related to how uncomfortable you can get, like, how comfortable withuncomfortable. You can get like, that's, can you like, what's your resilience? And she, you know, and I think, like, I think a lot of people have been outsourcing so long how they feel based on, like, what's going on out in the world, and not going back to like, how can I make myself the best version? Because we can affect the people around us more easily when you were talking about other it made me think you guys Google the Heineken commercial. It's quite long, but they literally took, like, people of opposite extremes and like, they took a guy who, like, voted against gay marriage, and then they took a lesbian and they put them in a room together, and they have to, like, build a desk, right? And like, and they, a table, or they build something. And the guy, like, this one guy is like, completely, I got this. I like, I can do these things, right? And she's like, and like, so they have to work together to build this thing. And like, each personal strengths have to do it, and then they have to sit down and have a beer. And at the end, the people who like when they interviewed them before they met the person they're building with, it would be like, I don't understand transgenders. I think they have to know rights, blah, blah, blah. And then they meet someone who's transgender, but they just built this desk together, and you watch this person go, well, let's have another drink and like, so it's really fascinating that, like, if we can actually stop, you know, being on the opposite sides, we can actually be together, and you get to know people, you're more likely to hear them and listen to them and realize we're kind of like what you think has been influenced by so much, by other people who are louder and you you actually love people who are around you more than you know, you know? And so I think that's what's so beautiful about a yoga class, or even Pilates classes, they can attract people from all sides of a spectrum and have a shared experience. And you know, because, and the more they get to know themselves, the more ideally, and this may be the idealist in me, like they think about caring for others, because they can, because once you've, once you've taken care of you, you actually have the capacity to actually care about other people.
Anthony Benenati 34:45
Oxygen mask, baby. It's all about putting on your oxygen mask, right? You got to put yours on first. You can't help anybody else if you're passed out. But I like what you said there, too, because Yoga does want to meet people where they're at. I remember, I had this woman in class. She always sat up front and in the beginning of class, at that time, we would chant the sound of om in the beginning of class, just to settle the class and get things going. And she would never chant, and that's fine. You don't have to, right? It's again, everything's an invitation. But she did come up to me after class one day, and we had a conversation, and I asked her why, and she says, well, you know, I'm a devout Jew, and I feel like I'm sort of disrespecting my tradition if I'm doing something I don't understand. And I said, well, I'm so glad that you brought that up. First of all, yoga doesn't care what you believe. You can believe you know, Orange is God, and you can still practice. Yoga doesn't require a belief, it just requires a willingness. And I said, well, you're a devout Jew, so what are you comfortable saying? And she said, well, shalom. And I said, Well, what's in the middle of shalom? And she said om. And I said, exactly. So from that point on, we would chant om, and she would chant shalom, and she would just hold the om. It, for some reason, it gave her permission. It was totally fine with everybody else, and then she felt included. That was a wonderful story.
Lesley Logan 36:19
I love that. I think also giving people permission, right? Like, I think that's what, you know, people can have permission to move their body, but also be in practice. Like, that's why it's called a yoga practice, and I think that's what it does so well, something that, like, I call it a Pilates practice, and there are a lot of people like me who call it practice, but there's also a lot of people who don't understand that, and they don't call it that, and they're like, I gotta get this. And it's like, no, what are you talking about, like, you're never gonna like, you don't get that. Like, it's your body. Your body's different every single day. Like, there are days like, at 6am I do Pilates, and at 8am I work out with you, and my body between those two hours is very different. And I'm like, whoa. I, what happened on my dog walk that this is no longer an option. I do, I do like that. Okay, I want to go into, because I think, like, you have had so many chapters in your yoga career, and what how you are, how you are teaching yoga now, is very different than what you did for the majority on your studio and things like that. Like we talk about some, be it till you see it moments and like, kind of like, what your what are you being till you see it, right now?
Anthony Benenati 37:20
You're right. I did go through a lot when you when you have a studio for that long, you know, you go through a lot of changes, including me and my original partner, we split, and then there was that moment where you had to decide who's going to fight for this, who's going to get the studio, because we both wanted it, and that was that was all about desire. Do you really want this? And how bad do you want it? And then after that, there were other things that came up every time you're being tested. And you will be tested no matter how committed you think you are to whatever it is that you think you want, you're going to continue to be tested. And it just is a way to reaffirm, do I really want to be it? Do I really want to do this? For me now, you're right. It is different. My body is different. My practice is different, and not in a bad or a good way, just different. This is the different body than it was when it was in my late 20s. Being it now is, for me, is really being about being authentic, being authentic to the moment, being authentic to my students, but really being authentic to my own inner voice. And every time I get on the mat, the first thing I tell my students is, listen, listen to your body. It's going to tell you something different today than it did yesterday. If you come onto the mat with an agenda, most of the time, you're going to be disappointed, because you don't know that your body's ready to do those things that day, that particular day, maybe you need something completely different than you thought. We have to be open to that. And then the day I decided that my time of studio ownership was over, that was a tough one. That was a really hard day. But the moment I decided to make that shift, I felt so much more freedom. Yoga had changed, you know, it really had become corporate. At this point, it was being completely watered down. People were barely doing teacher trainings and leading yoga classes, and it just became too much of a struggle to do the business of yoga versus being the teacher. You know, when you own your own business, you never are not working. That's the thing. It's 24/7 right? You don't get to clock out and go home and forget about it.
Lesley Logan 39:50
Yeah, there's a reason why I like, watch White Lotus. I'm like, because I'm not where I can't work and watch White Lotus like, this is me being awesome. That's how it serves me. Even if it, like, gives me a little stress and anxiety, I'm like, but I'm not working, so I get it, no, like, I mean, like, yeah, and then I I, I'm where I'm married to someone I work with. So it's never, it's never off. Yeah, but I, thank you for sharing that, because, I mean, like, I think a lot of people, there's an aspiration to start something or do something or own something. But as you said, you've evolved. Not only has yoga evolved, but you've evolved. Your body has changed. And I think sometimes we forget that as we evolve, we outgrow some roles, you know, and like, just like you outgrow clothes, like you outgrow, like you outgrow a role, and it's like owning a studio serves such a good purpose, like a good purpose at the time, like you had a partner and a family and, like all these things. And then it also got to a place where it's like all this is changing, and I have, too, you know, but that's so hard to like, because it's like a light switch.
Anthony Benenati 40:58
Yeah. Well, you know, I had felt it, but not really paid attention to it. And you know how your body does, your body will jump in there and it'll call your attention. And I literally had my one and only panic attack at that moment. It was like, oh yeah, this is a sign you are not in a good place. This, this, this, it's time to get out. It's time this, this had run its course. And that was a hard decision to really give up the thing that you worked so hard to create. But it was also learning that that was separate from who I was, that we were not inextricably connected, that we were these individual things, and we did create a third thing, but that third thing was dying, and it was time to change into something else.
Lesley Logan 41:46
Yeah, yeah. What are you most excited about right now?
Anthony Benenati 41:51
Oh my gosh, we are empty nesters. That's the most, 25 years of being a parent.
Lesley Logan 41:59
I had someone I just interviewed. She's like, I'm a bird launcher. She's like, I've launched all my birds. They're all birds. They're all launched. Like, the positive of that.
Anthony Benenati 42:10
It is so true. We are so excited about this next chapter for us, which is freedom in a lot of different ways, right? I mean, you're never not the parent, but they don't need you every day anymore. They need you when they need you and and happy to be there when they do. Like this morning, my youngest called from college, and she stayed on the phone for over an hour. And she just needed feedback. She needed to connect. She didn't necessarily need a ton of advice. She just, you could feel that she needed connection. For now, for me, it really is about this next chapter. Your lives are a bunch of chapters, and at being, you know, 50, I'll be 58 this year. It's a very I know, right? Yeah, I can't believe it myself, but this idea now that I can make choices solely for me or solely for us as a couple and not oh my god, what are we going to do with the kids, and is this child going to come? Or are they not going to come, or are we going to do this all together, that we can make these choices for ourselves, I'm really excited about that. That's the personal aspect of it. Professionally, professionally, things have changed, you know, ever since covid, everybody went online, and which is great. It's a great way to connect to everybody, but I still feel the need to be in the classroom, yeah, and we do those in persons, and we do those yoga retreats, and we do those monthly workshops, just so that people can have that feeling of connection and community again.
Lesley Logan 43:52
Yeah, I think that's why we do our tours, too. Like, I love being online, because I can impact people without having to travel as much. And also, like, I need to see bodies in three dimensions.
Anthony Benenati 44:03
Right. How do you make an adjustment with you can't see and touch?
Lesley Logan 44:06
No, I'm literally going so if I was there, I would hold your arms still. Imagine I'm like, is your child around? Can they grab your arms and hold them? Hold their hold their arms. Okay. Now go.
Anthony Benenati 44:18
That's so good.
Lesley Logan 44:19
You know, but like, I think, I think that's why, like, I like the idea of, like, really reframing what's good or bad. Because, like, I think it could be so easy, like, back before the pandemic, like, oh, online is terrible. You can't have those things. But we, Brad and I used to, like, call you just be on the phone. Because I was like, I can't handle the traffic. I can't but I want you. So just, just be on just be on speakerphone, and we'll mute ourselves, and we'll be, you know, but like, when the pandemic happened, I was like, oh, I love this, because now I can have access to the people, I don't live in the same town as you, and I, Brad and I still get to have that practice with you, and I think, but also, yeah, we miss, like, actual hugs and actually seeing people, and you have to be more intentional. But I think that that, I think then we are more intentional, you know, so that is also cool.
Anthony Benenati 45:08
Yeah, we really mourned the day you guys left.
Lesley Logan 45:12
When we moved from L.A. to Las Vegas was during the pandemic, and we didn't actually have a mourning, because nothing was actually happening in person, the more like it was a year and a half later when things opened back up and we were not part of the opening back up that was like, so it was a delayed mourning, a delayed grief for us. Okay, obviously, we're gonna all catch up, guys. We're gonna take a brief break, find out how people can find you, follow you, do yoga with you.
Anthony Benenati 45:39
Great.
Lesley Logan 45:40
All right, Anthony, where do you hang out? Like, are you on the Instagram? Or is there just a simpler way? How can people do yoga with you or learn more about what you're doing? Where do you where can they go?
Anthony Benenati 45:52
Well, they can go to my website, which is, thatsnotyoga.com and of course, there's a story behind that, because that's a pretty bold statement, which was intentional. One of the misconceptions about yoga is that anything goes, right, and that is so far from the truth. If yoga is about anything, it's about setting meaningful boundaries. So if you take a bunch of energy and you narrow it, you're going to increase the flow of that energy. Just think of water. Take a lake. Narrow the boundaries. It becomes a river. Narrow the boundaries even more, becomes a raging river. So most people think that if you limit their choices, then you're limiting their freedom. But I call it the Cheesecake Factory theory. Walk into a Cheesecake Factory and you sit down, and they literally throw you down a book. And they're like, okay, what do you want? And you can have anything. The book is like, an inch thick. And I just get overloaded because there's too many choices. I much prefer to go to a restaurant where they just print the menu that day and there's six things on it, and you can have this, this or this, and I'm like, great, I'll have that. The narrowing of your choices actually gives you more freedom, because you're constantly saying no to a bunch of things while you're saying yes to a limited amount of things, right? Like being in marriage, you're saying yes to Brad and no to everybody else. It's this process that continues throughout your entire day, right? What am I letting in? What am I consciously keeping away? I love that understanding.
Lesley Logan 47:42
I love that. So you guys just so you know, because he didn't say it, but I'm gonna say it for him. Brad and I can do yoga online with this man. You do it three times a week. I try to show up twice a week when I'm there. And Brad, we're getting him on the 8 am wake up call. We're working on. Do you remember? Do you remember when he used to do it 6 am? I think we have to remind him that he used to do 6 am yoga.
Anthony Benenati 48:03
Absolutely.
Lesley Logan 48:03
When the bed was further away from the studio was the the thing. So you guys can do that. You can find that on, on, thatsnot yoga.com. You kind of just gave us a Be It Action Item. But I just want to see like, if there's any other bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted steps people can take to be it till they see it.
Anthony Benenati 48:18
Okay. The the, the the triad, the triumvirate that we like to follow in the practice, is desire, knowledge, action. Those are my Be It moments. To break it down, you got to want to do something, then you have to learn how to do it, and then you do it, this whole idea of just do it, that's not going to work. Just doing something without knowing how to do it can cause you harm doing something and you don't have the real desire to do it, you're not going to put your best effort in. If you do those three things in that order, you can pretty much do whatever you want to do. You've got to want to do it. You got to learn how to do it, and then you simply have to do it, and you have to commit to doing it over and over and over again to create that meaningful change. Those are my action items. And the thing is, is, if you don't want to do it, don't do it. That's the thing. You're, exactly, more freedom. And that's whole, that's yoga's goal. Yoga just wants you to be more free. But that doesn't mean no boundaries. It means establishing meaningful boundaries, boundaries that are going to channel you in the direction you want to go. And guess what, people, you can always change your mind. You can always change your mind.
Lesley Logan 49:48
I mean, that is like that needs to be on people's walls. Because I find like, you know, like, imagine if you never gave yourself permission to change your mind. You might, you might, the world might have lost a yoga teacher that day, because you would have had a panic attack and then a burnout, you know, like, you can change your mind on your schedule, you can change your mind on your goals. You can change your mind on lot of things, like, you know, and that is for the perfectionist, listening. That might be the hardest thing you learn.
Anthony Benenati 50:14
I'm speaking to you, perfectionist.
Lesley Logan 50:17
Yeah, oh my gosh, Anthony, obviously I could talk to you for hours. And clearly Brad is like itching to walk in this room, you guys, so we gotta let him in so you can say hi to his friend, but thank you for being here, and thank you for just sharing so much of your wisdom. I continue to learn from you. Always. I can't wait to learn more. Someday we're gonna do a joint Pilates, yoga. That is my dream. That is my vision. Maybe on the Summer Tour. Maybe you'll be our L.A. event. So see, you guys, let us know what your favorite takeaways were. Let Anthony know in thatsnotyoga. Let the Be It Pod know and share this with a friend who needs to hear it, because that's how everyone wins. You know, we all can take away something from this, and I'd love to hear what yours are, and you know what to do, until next time, Be It Till You See It.
Lesley Logan 51:02
That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.
Brad Crowell 51:41
It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.
Lesley Logan 51:46
It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.
Brad Crowell 51:50
Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.
Lesley Logan 51:58
Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.
Brad Crowell 52:01
Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.
Lesley Logan 52:14
I'm interviewing Anthony.
Anthony Benenati 52:15
Hi, Brad.
Lesley Logan 52:16
Yeah, it's an interview right now. No, we're not done. You're just interrupting. We'll put this in the bloopers. He's come in twice, and I'm like, um.
Anthony Benenati 52:24
What's up, buddy?
Brad Crowell 52:26
I wanted to say hi.
Lesley Logan 52:27
Yeah. Okay, alright, one second, let me get to those Be It Action Items. Okay. We'll talk.
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