The Terri Cole Show

734 Are You an (Unintentional) Boundary Bully?


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Do you find yourself saying "I don't want to hurt their feelings" while completely abandoning your own needs? You think you're being nice, but you're actually training people to ignore what matters to you—because you're ignoring it first.

In this episode, I break down the hidden cost of people-pleasing and why "being nice" is often just self-abandonment dressed up as politeness. I go over the 5 core types of boundaries (physical, emotional, mental, material, and energetic) and shares exactly what healthy boundary-setting looks like in real life.

You'll learn:

  • Why boundaries aren't walls—they're doors that YOU control
  • How you teach people to treat you by what you allow, stop, and reinforce
  • The difference between being liked and being safe
  • What to do when people get mad about your boundaries
  • Why the more authentic you is waiting on the other side of the limits you set

Plus, get Terri's Boundary Script Kit with scripts for all 5 types of boundaries at terricole.com/guide.

If you've spent years people-pleasing and managing other people's emotions, this episode will help you reclaim your peace and show up as your full, authentic self.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/734

Doors to Boundary Bootcamp are open! It's my 8 week Flagship Boundary Course with 8 Live Q&A Coaching Calls. To get more info and sign up got to terricole.com/bb2025

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The Terri Cole ShowBy Terri Cole

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