Dear Midlife...

Abandoning Expectations and Leaning into Your Strengths


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Our next guest, Elle Hart, took the phrase "empty nest" to the extreme when she simultaneously sent her children off to college and got divorced at the same time. Girl don't mess around! AND, after raising 3 boys and being a stay-at-home mom for 25 years and without ever having had a real job before, she picked up her life and moved halfway across the country to California, where she began life in MID life from a blank slate. That takes TREMENDOUS guts.

But the thing about adversity is that it brings to light who we are and what we are made of and in this instance, this rang particularly true for Elle. While working in a school, Elle began exploring and became a practitioner of emotional intelligence. During this time, she discovered the Clifton Strengths Finder as a tool to help her identify her natural strengths and gifts, as well as her deficits using this unbiased assessment.

It was this awareness that helped her recognize how she could bring her own gifts into the world to help others. She developed a process that helps her clients gain what she has coined as "self-intelligence". And her natural way of connecting with her clients on such a personalized level helps bring clarity to their strengths and helps them feel empowered every day.

Elle's story is an inspiring example that we are stronger and more courageous than ever as we navigate "the middle" of our lives. It is NEVER too late to understand who YOU are and to find new ways to bring your gifts into this world.

In this episode, Elle teaches us:

  1. Live in the present moment. Forgive yourself of the past and the mistakes you may have made. While you can learn from them, you cannot change them. Don't focus too much on trying to control the future. The present moment is all we have.
  2. Let go of expectations...the ones you have of other people, the ones other people have of you and the expectations you have of yourself.
  3. When you understand your strengths and lean into your gifts, you will feel empowered. Stop trying to be someone you are not. Living in MISalignment may be what has you feeling like you're stuck.
  4. When asked to tell others about ourselves, we typically start by listing the roles we play. When you have awareness of your personal strengths and characteristics, you can start the dialogue using terms that demonstrate who YOU are and what you bring to the table.
  5. Knowledge is power. Apply your strengths to the 4 foundational areas in life: belief in yourself, your relationships, career path and health and wellness. Sometimes, we can compare our strengths with those who play a prominent role in our lives (spouses/colleagues) to see where our strengths coincide and where they clash. This helps us to build stronger relationships in which we replace "expectations" with "resepectations" and learn to forgive, respect and understand the strengths of others.

You can find more of Elle at:

Website | www.feelempoweredeveryday.com/gps

LinkedIn | @elle-hart

IG | @feelempoweredeveryday

Facebook | feelempoweredeveryday

YouTube | Feel Empowered Everyday

We'd love to know what gifts you're most proud of! Leave us a review or join our FB group. We are here to support one another on this journey together.

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Dear Midlife...By Shelby Bybee and Trinity Greenfield

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