If you want your marriage to improve, it requires an identity shift. Usually in both of you. You have to go from a couple in conflict, to a couple that sees themselves as a united team.

In this episode of the podcast, I'm diving in to identity shifts. This episode airs on my actual birthday and I was reflecting on my identity this time last year, versus where I am this year.

WOW. What a difference.

Listen in as I share a simple process to create your own identity shifts and immediately step into more of what you want - not only in your marriage, but in every area of your life.

Also mentioned in this episode, The Marriage UpGrade, my signature 6-month coaching program for Christian P.O.W.E.R. Couples. To learn more visit my website DrChavonne.com and click Marriage UpGrade.

How often are you thinking about and moving in the direction of what you want? 

Thinking about what you want is one of the most valuable uses of your time. When you focus on what you want, you give yourself the opportunity to create it. Your brain becomes more oriented to how it's possible vs. how it's not.

In this podcast episode, we are diving into the 5 steps that help you tap into the goals and desires you have for your marriage so you can actually make them a reality.

I also leave you with the most important daily habits that will help you create positive change faster and more effective than anything else.

Where were things in your marriage this time last year? Are they better, the same, or worse now?

So many couples find themselves stuck dealing with the same thoughts, feelings and issues.

In this episode of the podcast I talk through 4 questions you want to ask yourself to uncover and deeply understand why you are where you are.

This is a deep and profound conversation to have with yourself, and asking these 4 questions will help you see what's been happening and also what's possible for you moving forward.

I hope you walk away inspired and motivated to truly create the change you want to experience.

Pettiness in marriage. Even as adults, we can go there sometimes. It seems justified, but rarely leads to the type of communication and connection we truly want.

In this episode I'm breaking down the mindset of petty behavior, so you can understand why this way of showing up can sometimes be so tempting.

I also provide you with specific strategies to overcome any petty tendencies in your marriage and offer you the pathway to a more mature, vulnerable and healthy way of working through your issues.

Also mentioned in this episode:

Communication Masterclass Series - 5 full days of teaching and coaching to help you and your spouse stop arguing and communicate more easily. Sign up for this free Masterclass Series here: https://drchavonne.com/communication/

Whenever I am speaking on the topic of communication in your marriage, there are a series of questions that are commonly asked.

This week on the podcast, I'm answering them for you.

I dive into the following questions:

• What to do when your spouse is super defensive 

• What to do when your spouse shuts down and refuses to talk about something 

• How to stop being so angry when you bring things to your spouse

• What to do when your spouse is controlling your communication 

• How to stop finger pointing (policing each other) 

• How to de-escalate an argument 

Tune in now to get the answers you need.

AND join me for my Communication Masterclass Series. This month, I'm hosting 5 Masterclasses all designed to help you and your spouse improve your communication.

All the details and free registration can be found here: https://drchavonne.com/communication/

Replays are available if you cannot join us live!

Your communication is the FOUNDATION of your marriage. If you can't communicate effectively, you can't connect. And if you can't connect you have two people essentially living separate lives.

In this episode, I have a special guest, and close coach friend, Julie Danielson join me for this co-podcast. Julie is a DIVORCE coach, yep you read that right. And the insight she shares about the communication breakdowns that were persistent issues in her clients previous marriages is enlightening.

In this episode, she shares 3 specific issues in communication, that when they are more the norm than the exception, completely erode the health of the marriage.

It is our hope that my sharing this information, you and your spouse can identify what might be breaking down in your own communication and get help NOW, before it's a crisis, or worse, before it's too late.

Mentioned in this Episode:

Get Over Divorce Podcast with Julie Danielson

The Marriage UpGrade - my 6-month couples coaching program to help you break the patterns of communication that damage your marriage, and replace them with positive communication approaches that bring you closer together.

Today we are talking about challenges - specifically, when you commit to a certain set of actions for a defined period of time in order to achieve an important goal.

Challenges can really support you in creating positive change in your life. And at this point in the year, you may have lost sight of a goal, or fallen out of the habits you are looking to change. This episode will give you the boost of motivation you need to get back on track.

I'm sharing 3 different types ways to do a challenge, and why they work so well to help you uplevel the way you show up to achieve what you want.

Marriage Challenges are an major component of my program, The Marriage UpGrade, and my clients are having massive success changing their patterns and becoming better partners to each other.

Tune in now and follow along to create your own challenge. You'll be so proud of who you become and the ways your life and marriage get better.

Also mentioned in this episode, The Marriage UpGrade is open for Pre-enrollment this week. This is my 6 month signature group coaching program for couples. If you are ready to stop arguing, recover quickly from conflict, and truly solve some of your long-standing issues for good, this is the program to help you. Learn more and sign up here: The Marriage UpGrade

One of the most commonly sited skills couples mention needing improvement in is LISTENING. They can recognize their mutual inability to truly listen to understand each other, and notice how often they are listening to PROVE their point.

In this episode of the podcast, we are diving into why this happens, and the specific steps you can take to become a better listener in your marriage.

When you both are practicing this work, you elevate your conversations and are able to be more productive and effective as a team.

Making decisions becomes so much easier. Expressing yourself and having your needs heard and understood becomes the new way of being.

I'm sharing with you the 5 most important steps to take so that you can increase your skill and have better communication in your marriage.

Also mentioned in this episode:

There are several ways I can support you in doing this work, having better communication, and improving the overall quality of your marriage. To learn about all your options for working with me directly, visit my website: drchavonne.com

We are tackling a tough topic today. What's normal? It's a question I get asked so often and while what's normal is in many ways subjective. However, in my conversations with many couples and individuals, there are some common things I see happening (or hear about happening) that are outside the normal range of what's healthy in a relationship.

In this episode, I break down the 5 most common not normal vs. normal behaviors and ways of interacting.

It is my hope that after listening, you have a better idea of things that can be improved, vs things that HAVE to improve in order for your marriage to be healthy, and ultimately thriving.

Let me know what you take away and how this conversation helps you in getting the reality check you may need today.

Also mentioned in this episode:

The Fresh Start Challenge - my 5-day video training series to help you reset your marriage, make important shifts, and set your communication and connection in a much better direction. It's free. Learn more and sign up here: https://drchavonne.com/fresh-start-2024/

Coaching with me - to learn about your options for private, individual, couple, and group coaching programs to help you feel better and create a better marriage, visit my website: drchavonne.com

One of the reasons couples have a hard time communicating is because they are not appropriately prepared for all the directions a conversation can go.

Often people come to me wanting to know how to handle certain situations that have happened and not gone well.

The key is to learn from what went wrong and to focus your energy on the most important aspects of creating a positive interaction.

Being prepared for anything requires you spend some time on the front end making decisions for how you will show up, rather than reacting negatively and then having to spend MORE time in frustration or trying to repair a broken connection.

In this podcast episode, I give you the process for how to be prepared for anything - any conversation, and any interaction with your partner.

There is a mindset you must adopt in addition to practical steps to take.

Tune in now to dive into both.

Mentioned in this episode: If you are looking for help to apply any of the skills we discussed, and are ready to improve your marriage, I invite you to work with me directly in one of my individual, group, private, or couples coaching programs. To learn more, visit DrChavonne.com