Creating a Family: Talk about Adoption & Foster Care

An Adoptee's Search for Identity, Family, and Belonging


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Join our discussion with an adult adoptee about her search for her birth family and her identity. We will talk with Julie Ryan McGue, a domestic adoptee and an identical twin. She is the author of Twice a Daughter, which explores her coming to terms with her adoption and her search for her birth parents, and Twice the Family, which explores more of her relationship with her adoptive family.

In this episode, we cover:

  • Tell us your adoption story.
  • What role did adoption play, if any, in your childhood?
  • Feelings of needing to be perfect.
  • Fantasizing about birth family. 
  • When did you begin to search for your birth parents? 
  • Was searching for your birth family something you knew you would do from a young age?
  • After considerable effort, you located your birth mother. At first, she said she did not want contact. How did that leave you feeling? 
  • After you had phone calls and met, you didn’t want to tell her much about your adoptive parents. 
  • How did your mom (your adoptive mom) react to your search and when you found your birth mother? 
  • How do you wish she had reacted?
  • What happened with your search for your birth father?
  • Did you feel the same sense of shame, embarrassment, and rejection? 
  • Your birth mom’s reticence to help you find your birth father and your continued search caused a rift in your relationship. How is the relationship now?
  • The tension between the birth parents’ right to privacy vs. the adoptee’s right to know. 
  • Your experience with online adoptee forums. 
  • The primal wound.
  • Importance of adoptee support groups.

Support the show

Please leave us a rating or review. This podcast is produced by www.CreatingaFamily.org. We are a national non-profit with the mission to strengthen and inspire adoptive, foster & kinship parents and the professionals who support them.

Creating a Family brings you the following trauma-informed, expert-based content:

  • Weekly podcasts
  • Weekly articles/blog posts
  • Resource pages on all aspects of family building
...more
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