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What does Jesus actually mean when he tells us to judge a tree by its fruit - and what happens when we apply that idea to marriage and Christian teaching? Today Joanna, our resident statistician, joins us as we dig into the biblical meaning of “good fruit,” unpack the research behind our marriage studies, and explore what trust, spiritual fruit, and decision-making have to do with one another. We also welcome Dr. Camden Morgante and discuss her amazing book “Recovering From Purity Culture”. Settle in for Part 2 of our 3-part series to kick off this new season - you don’t want to miss this one! 

CHECK OUT OUR OCTOBER SIMULCAST EVENT

We're doing our sex talk and a one-day marriage conference! Check it out for more information.

TO SUPPORT US: 

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED: 

• About Josh Butler’s book  “Beautiful Union” 
• Our podcasts referencing Josh Butler:
  • Episode 260
  • Episode 301
• M.J. Langham Thread link
• Dr. Camden Morgante’s book, “Recovering From Purity Culture”
• Dr. Camden’s Substack
• Harmful Outcomes of Purity Culture Facebook Quotes

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue 
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
•  The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
•  and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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And….we’re BACK with a fresh new season of the Bare Marriage podcast! We’re kicking things off with a lively deep dive into the debate over purity culture, asking what happens when influential Christian voices revise their past teachings, redefine the terms, and rewrite the history of what they once taught. We unpack the difference between biblical chastity and shame-based purity culture, take on straw man arguments and shifting definitions, and explore how messages about sex, marriage, authority, and obligation can shape the church in ways we may not always recognize. Real change requires more than just saying something was harmful - it requires honesty, accountability, and a willingness to pursue better fruit. This is Part 1 of a 3-part series, so let’s get to it and be sure to tune in next week!

CHECK OUT OUR OCTOBER SIMULCAST EVENT

We're doing our sex talk and a one-day marriage conference! Check it out for more information.

TO SUPPORT US: 

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED: 

• Friday Round-Up link on Alisa Childers
• Our statement on Shaunti Feldhahn (with links to her statement)
• Roys Report article on Sheila calling out Focus on the Family
• The Whole Story Course
• Our book, “She Deserves Better”
• Dannah’s interview with Juli Slattery
• Dannah’s interview with Focus on the Family
• Zachary Wagner’s book, “Men of Virtue”

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue 
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
•  The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
•  and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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In this season finale we take a dive into social media, examining the messages behind viral clips from popular marriage and church influencers, and challenge fear-based teachings about marriage, parenting, gender, and authority. Through our thoughtful (and often hilarious) analyses and lively discussion, we hope this conversation encourages you to pursue healthier, Christ-centered relationships rooted in mutual respect, truth, and genuine spiritual freedom. 

CHECK OUT OUR OCTOBER SIMULCAST EVENT

We're doing our sex talk and a one-day marriage conference! Check it out for more information.

TO SUPPORT US: 

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED: 

• Zachary Wagner’s Book “Men of Virtue”
• Podcast Episode 262: Problems with Marriage on the Rock by Jimmy Evans
• Episode 262 Blog Post
• Sheila’s Substack
• Alex Falcone's reel about divorce stats (he's the good one!)

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue 
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
•  The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
•  and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Send us Fan Mail

What does it actually mean to be a “good man” in today’s world—and does Christianity offer something deeper than dominance, leadership clichés, or internet manosphere culture? In this thoughtful and surprisingly hopeful conversation, Zachary Wagner joins us to unpack masculinity through the lens of the fruits of the Spirit, exploring everything from loneliness and power to marriage, self-control, parenting boys, and the modern crisis of meaning for men. Together, we challenge shallow cultural narratives and argue that true strength looks a lot more like love, service, courage, and emotional maturity than performance or control. Listen in as we propose a healthier vision of manhood for both men and the people who love them.

TO SUPPORT US: 

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED: 

• Zachary Wagner’s Website
• Zachary’s Book: “Men of Virtue”
• Our conversation with Zachary about his book Non-Toxic Masculinity

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue 
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
•  The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
•  and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Send us Fan Mail

What happens when you know the old “because I said so” parenting style isn’t healthy…but you also don’t want to raise entitled little tyrants? In this episode, parenting coach Wendy Snyder joins us for a deeply practical, heartfelt, (and hilariously honest) conversation about strong-willed kids, emotional regulation, yelling, boundaries, anxiety, and what healthy authority actually looks like in family life. Together, we unpack the difference between authoritarian, permissive, and powerful parenting—and why so many parents swing wildly between all three. From power struggles and picky eaters to shame spirals and unmet emotional needs, this episode is packed with compassionate, evidence-based wisdom that will leave you feeling both challenged and hopeful. If you’ve ever wondered how to parent with confidence without fear, guilt, or constant battles, this conversation is for you.

CHECK OUT OUR OCTOBER SIMULCAST EVENT

We're doing our sex talk and a one-day marriage conference! Check it out for more information.

TO SUPPORT US: 

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED: 

• Wendy Snyder’s Book “Fresh Start Your Family” Pre-Order Link & Bonuses 
• Wendy’s Website
• Wendy’s Instagram

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue 
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
•  The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
•  and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Send us Fan Mail

What if the “Billy Graham rule” (or the evangelical distortion of it) says more about fear than integrity? In this episode, Danielle Strickland helps us unpack the assumptions behind the idea that men and women can’t be alone together—and ask whether it protects integrity or quietly reinforces suspicion, segregation, and control. Drawing on Scripture, leadership research, and real-world church experiences, our conversation explores how transparency—not isolation—is a stronger safeguard against abuse and moral failure. We also dig into how purity culture, pornography narratives, and fear-based systems shape the way we interpret opposite-sex friendships, mentoring, and authority. If you’re ready to rethink gender, leadership, and trust through a more Jesus-centered lens, this one will give you plenty to chew on.

TO SUPPORT US: 

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED: 

• Danielle’s Book, “Better Together”
• Danielle’s Website
• Danielle’s Substack
• “The Billy Graham Rule” aka The Modesto Manifesto
• Podcast Episode 192: How Every Young Man's Battle Makes Everything Worse: 
• "Recovering From Purity Culture" by Dr. Camden Morgante 
• The Whole Story courses

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue 
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
•  The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
•  and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Send us Fan Mail

Welcome to Part 2 of our breakdown of For Men Only! This episode dives headfirst into the sex chapter — and quickly exposes how shaky stats and selective storytelling create misleading narratives about libido and desire. We examine why women’s sexual desire is far more contextual — and relational — than the book admits. We unpack the myth of “on-demand” desire, challenge rigid sex rules like the 72-hour expectation, and explore why libido is far more dynamic — and human — than most advice admits. We also critique popular marriage frameworks that outsource self-worth to partners and rely on oversimplified gender stereotypes rather than evidence-based relational health. Get ready for a candid, research-informed takedown of bad advice — with a clear message: real intimacy thrives on emotional maturity, not scripts.

TO SUPPORT US: 

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED: 

• Our article demolishing Shaunti Feldhahn's "research" on love & respect
• One Sheet on For Women Only 
• Podcast on For Women Only 
• Podcast on mental load
• Our book The Marriage You Want

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue 
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
•  The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
•  and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Send us Fan Mail

In this episode, we dive into For Men Only, by Shaunti & Jeff Feldhahn, and let’s just say…we have many thoughts! We unpack some of its core claims about gender dynamics, communication, and emotional needs. Rebecca shares how this book impacted her first few months of marriage to Connor, and not in a good way!

We address major concerns with the book’s research methods, its reliance on broad gender stereotypes, and its tendency to frame women as overly emotional and men as disengaged. While it contains one of the best descriptors we’ve seen on mental load, the Feldhahns have yet to propose workable solutions that include mutual accountability and behavioral change. Sheila and Rebecca advocate for a more nuanced, evidence-informed understanding of relationships—one that prioritizes emotional maturity, shared responsibility, and meaningful communication over simplified gender narratives. This one is worth a listen and keep an eye out for Part 2 next week!

TO SUPPORT US: 

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED: 

• Our article demolishing Shaunti Feldhahn's "research" on love & respect
• One Sheet on For Women Only 
• Podcast on For Women Only 
• Podcast on mental load
• Our book The Marriage You Want

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue 
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
•  The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
•  and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Send us Fan Mail

Tia Levings is back, and this time she's brought the book so many of you have been waiting for — I Belong to Me, a survivor's guide to recovery and hope after religious trauma, and the follow-up to her memoir A Well-Trained Wife.

After thousands of women slid into her DMs asking how did you heal, how do I find myself again, Tia sat down and wrote the guide she wished she'd had. In this conversation, we get into what religious trauma actually is and why therapists are only now starting to name it, how spiritual bypassing uses faith language to invalidate your pain, and why the period right after you leave a high-control church or marriage is actually when you're most vulnerable — not most free. We also talk about why your voice and your sexuality are twin wounds that heal together, how to start building boundaries when you've never been allowed to have any, and why real recovery eventually means sitting with your own complicity — not to shame yourself, but to finally choose something different. If you've ever wondered was what I went through actually trauma, and can I actually heal from it — this episode is for you.

TO SUPPORT US: 

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED: 

• I Belong to Me by Tia Levings — Release Date: May 5th — Pre-Order Now!
• Listen to Tia's first episode with us on her book The Well Trained Wife

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue 
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
•  The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
•  and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Send us Fan Mail

Who's carrying the mental and emotional load when it comes to sex? Today Keith and I are breaking down all the ways evangelical marriage culture places that burden almost entirely on women: from appearance standards and contraception to performing passion on demand and suppressing her own emotions so his experience stays comfortable. We are listening to sermon clips and reading quotes from bestselling Christian marriage books that are pretty hard to hear, but really important to call out for the harm they cause to women (and marriage).

We are also talking about what we all actually want — a sex life rooted in real intimacy, where both people get to show up with everything they are.

TO SUPPORT US: 

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED: 

• The Orgasm Course and The Husband’s Edition
• Starter Pack Podcasts on Making Sex Feel Great

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue 
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
•  The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
•  and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.