In this episode, I shared 12 commitments directly from my 2025 Calm & Confident planner. Let this serve as a road map to a better life. This will feel like a "best of" edition of my favorite, foundational life lessons — some that I've shared in more depth on this podcast and some that I have not. I know that a few of these commitments will resonate with you, and you'll know it when you hear it. Grab onto those lessons and take them in, work them around in your mind, and put them to work. Some of the lessons will not speak to you as much – good. You need to know your own life, thoughts, struggles and strengths. Know what you need to work on. You'll find it here. To get on the list for my upcoming 2026 planner, visit TrinaGray.com

"Learning to live with heart truly caring about other people, putting yourself out to other people, letting other people care about you, letting other people love you, letting other people see you, be willing to put yourself out as your true self, and letting people accept you and love you, knowing that at times, those same people will do something or say something that might hurt you, and we can handle it because we can live with both heart and armor." - Trina

Key points:

• I talk about the importance of personal responsibility—from setting things down that no longer serve me, to taking ownership of my life, to seeking less approval from others.

• I highlight how I manage overwhelm by making small decisions, letting go of perfectionism, and reducing the influence of outside opinions.

• I reflect on the natural swing of life's pendulum, the need for a lighter mind, and the understanding that change can look different and still be right for the season I'm in.

• I end the episode by encouraging myself and others to lean into the commitments that resonate most, embracing the balance of living with both heart and armor.

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In this episode, I shared three simple ways to calm down when your thoughts are running wild in your head in the middle of the day, or the middle of the night. Our day is made up of our thoughts. When we choose better thoughts, we choose a better day for ourselves. However, many things want to take us off track — headlines, social media feeds, other people's words and actions, or everyday life challenges. How can you take back control of your thoughts, and redirect your energy? How can you shut down intrusive thoughts and find a place of calm? How can you let things roll off your back? How can you focus on what matters most? Give this episode a listen and let's find calm together.

"I remind myself that I trust myself. I love that concept. I trust myself that even if I struggle, I will figure it out. Even if I make what turns out to be the wrong choice, the bad choice, the wrong hire, the wrong decision, I'll fix it." - Trina

Key points:

• Try out the 4-7-8 breathing technique when you need to immediately snap yourself out of a stressful situation, or a repeating, intrusive thought, or when you're struggling to focus or sleep. It's rooted in ancient yoga and it works.

• Find a mantra that speaks to you in your phrase of life right now. Whether you need to find motivation, process grief or get through a challenging time, there is a quote or mantra out there to help you. Find one and repeat it to yourself when you are spiraling with your thoughts.

• You can find more calm and show up with more energy, when the past 72 hours or your life have been made up of healthy habits. Your past three days of sleep, nutrition and fitness really impact how you feel right now.

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In this episode, I shared a method that I learned more than a decade ago from my mentor Todd Durkin, for "color coding" your life. I have tweaked it and adapted it over the years to fit my life as a working mom. This can work for you as a college student, working professional, or retiree. Take my tips, tricks and examples and make this your own. This system is an easy way to create more harmony in your life by ensuring that all four colors are represented in your month. In order to be responsible adults, we need "red tape" time to handle the logistics of life and our households, we also need "green machine" time to be productive in our work or career. In order not to burnout, we need "mellow yellow" time to relax, unwind and spend quality time with loved ones. Last, but not least, we need "blue sky time" in order to dream about our future. This is time to brainstorm, visualize, listen, or think, but not do.

"When you run your own day, you run your own life....I was busy this week. I was running. But what did I do? I don't want you to get to the end of your week feeling depleted, deflated, running rampant. I want you and I want myself to get to the end of the week feeling productive, feeling rejuvenated, even feeling successful." - Trina

Key points:

• Red Tape: logistics

Health care appointments, book travel, pay bills, organize kids' schedules, vet appt, car care, household chores, prep for a holiday, plan a family event,

• Green Machine: work (or school or pursuit)

Examples: work tasks, goals, deadlines, initiatives, projects, write, create, manage, lead, produce

• Mellow Yellow: down time, personal time

Examples: Hike, workout, date night, coffee with friend, read a book, watching a sporting event, dinner and a movie

• Blue sky: dreaming, not doing

Examples: Listen to a podcast, journal, make a vision dream board, talk to significant about future goals, meditate, dream about the future

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In this episode, I talked you through five tips or strategies for dealing with hateful words or rude people. It's not glorious, but it's a real part of life and one that I want to help you handle better. If you've been on the receiving end of rude comments, or personal attacks, this is for you. If you've had people launch mean words at your workplace, your organization, your leadership or you as a person, this is for you. I hope this helps you feel empowered. Haters are trying to hurt with their words. It often comes from a place of hurt. Instead of trying to figure them out, use these tips to decide your best action. This episode is about you, not them.

"Life is good, life is hard, life is great, life is ugly. It is both the goal is to move through the struggle faster, not to sit in it, not to dwell in it, not to become it." - Trina

Key points:

• First consider, what is the energy cost of getting involved in addressing the issue?

• Be proactive, not reactive. Your first reaction isn't your best reaction.

• Let people be wrong about you. Can you learn to live with people having the wrong idea about you or your organization? Is it worth it to fight it? Will it change anything?

• Learn to communicate as your higher self. Don't communicate as a bully; don't shrink yourself and become silent. Instead, communicate as your most calm, confident self. Speak with candor, speak with clarity. Put the truth out and let people who want to hear it, hear it.

• Know that you are deserving of hard feelings, but do those feelings serve you.

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In this episode, I talked you through an eye-opening journaling exercise that can truly help you thrive in life. I shared the experiences of hosting a local Calm & Confident Fall Retreat for 20 women and this part of the weekend was one of the most impactful. I had the women write and share on when they are thriving in life. I'm asking you to consider that question – what is the state of your health, your relationships, your energy, your career, your friendships when you are most thriving in life? Have you noticed, or can you start to pay attention? Even if you are in a state of struggle or transition, be open to thriving through those seasons, rather than wait for the stars to align.

"What does that trust look like in your life? Is that trust in your faith? Is that trust in yourself? Is that trust in the people closest to you, or maybe all of the above, is that trust in your future? Is that trust in your abilities, some level of trust, I believe is required in order to be thriving in life, because we feel safe, we feel secure, we feel competent, we feel strong. I want you to think about that. What does that look like in your life?" - Trina

Key points:

• Trust Is Foundational: Trust in oneself, others, and the future is essential for truly thriving in life, as it brings safety, security, competence, and strength.

• Thriving Looks Different for Everyone: The retreat participants discovered that their sense of thriving could stem from task completion, the happiness of loved ones, or prioritizing personal wellness.

• External vs. Internal Thriving: Linking your sense of thriving solely to external achievements or others' happiness can be limiting; true thriving is cultivated from within, independent of perfect circumstances.

• Thriving Through Challenges: Rather than waiting for everything to be settled, the idea of "thriving through" difficulties encourages agency, resilience, and personal growth even during setbacks.

• Self-Reflection Promotes Growth: Regularly reflecting on your health, work clarity, relationships, and level of trust enables you to identify what helps you thrive and empowers you to bring your best energy to all aspects of life.

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In this episode, I shared ten ways to let go of unnecessary stress in order to live a more calm and fulfilling life — a life with less weight on your mind and unease in your gut. I distinguish between the kind of stress that drives productivity from the kind of stress that feels like dread. Know the difference and go through my checklist of ten common stressors to see where you could make a change. One small change can yield incredible results in your daily inner peace.

"When you neglect your ability to plug yourself back in, to get a good night's sleep, to unplug from technology, to set down the weight of the world, to just pour into yourself, whatever that means for you, if that's relaxing with a book, if that's a workout, if it's going for a walk, if it's a conversation with a friend or a loved one, if it's cooking a great meal, whatever it is for you, what can you do to make sure that you are resting and recharging? It's as important as the action and the proactive steps you're taking in your life to do great things." - Trina

Key points:

• We draw unnecessary stress from many places in life. Identify what your triggers are so you can address them or remove them.

• From unrealistic deadlines, to the scale, to perfectionism, there are ways to ditch the stress without guilt.

• The goal is not to remove all responsibility from your life, and to let the world pass by while you sit and watch "stress-free." The goal is to contribute and show up as your best self every day. You can't do that under a blanket of stress.

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In this episode, I shared one of my takeaways from a recent Ultra Mastermind retreat, hosted by Brendon Bruchard, a high performance speaker and best-selling author. He talked about how frustration can lead to burnout or bitterness. I took this topic and ran with it, applying it to work, family, and personal life. I shared examples of how it shows up in my life and yours. I talked about who we become when we are frustrated, and how we don't want to stay in that negative, disempowering energy. Our frustrated self is not our best self. I shared three ways of releasing frustration that can help you feel better faster. "What frustrates you? Can you identify it? Can you think about it, and can you start to deflate it? Because even just identifying it and recognizing it takes some of the power away from it that doesn't creep up on you and surprise you that you actually know that that's something that frustrates you and that you want to get better at it." - Trina

Key points:

• Frustration is a common experience in both work and home life, and recognizing its sources is the first step to addressing it.

• The way we talk about our work and home life—whether we focus on challenges or opportunities—shapes our experience and energy.

• Burnout and bitterness often stem from unaddressed frustration; taking ownership and recalibrating your mindset is essential.

• There are three strategies to release frustration: mentally (journaling), emotionally (venting to a safe person with boundaries), and physically (movement or productive activity).

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In this episode, I shared four tips for organizing, leading or hosting ANY event – from a bridal shower, to a family gathering, to a community fundraiser, to a work retreat, or a conference. This can be used in your personal or professional life to create a better, easier experience for you and your guests. We'll dive into preparation, plan b's, positivity and presence as ways to create a successful event. I shared my recent experiences with organizing an open house for work and hosting an upcoming women's retreat. I hope my examples help you envision your next event and arm you with tools to feel more calm and confident at the host.

"Things are not going to always go to plan in your event, right? We can't control every circumstance, and you can't have thought through every detail. But how do you react or act when something goes off the rails?" - Trina

Key points:

• Being prepared for the event will alleviate unnecessary stress. Being prepared is not the same as obsessing over every small detail.

• Creating "plan B's" ahead of time will help you enjoy the event more. What could go wrong and how will you react to that? From the weather to cancellations to scenarios you simply can't dream up, your reaction matters.

• Staying positive will help you roll the punches of event, even when someone says something that throws you off. Choose not to overthink or create unnecessary stories.

• Being fully present at the activity or event is a gift to yourself and your attendees. Try to disconnect from technology. Have conversations and participate as the others do.

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In this episode, I share stories and lessons on an area of life that matters to all of us — friendship. I discuss how to honor, but differentiate friendships that are built on a circumstance or a chapter of life, from those that are built to last time, distance and life experiences. This is a great episode for reflecting on the types of friendships that you have in your life, and to think about what you value most in your friends. You can do some soul-searching on what you bring to your friendships, which ones might be worth pouring more energy into, and what relationships might have lost their strength or connection. It's important to have friends to do daily life with, who know what you have going on at work or home without a ton of explanation. These are friends to catch up over lunch, go for a walk, go to a workout, or hang with your families, etc. Those kinds of daily friendships knit us together with others in our community. It''s important to have another level or layer of friends who you trust and value on a deeper level that you know love you without jealousy or judgement.

"Certain friendships in your life and mine. These are friendships that last the test of time. They last distance, miles, states in between you, and they last through different and even difficult life experiences." - Trina

Key points:

• Lasting friendships are those that withstand time, distance, and life changes, providing mutual respect, love, care, and trust.

• Friendships can be based on different life stages or circumstances, and it's natural for some to fade as life evolves, while others remain strong.

• The most enduring friendships are built on genuine support, lack of jealousy or judgment, and a shared desire for each other's growth and happiness.

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In this episode, I share two ways to be more productive, less stressed, and more focused on your pursuits in life. The strategy is to be stronger than distractions, and better able to handle disruptions. These "d" words come in all different shapes and sizes. Tune in for examples from my life that might spark ideas in your life. Let's discuss how to prevent social, news, emails, texts or other people's demands distract you. Let's discuss how to keep unexpected events at work and home from throwing you off track. I hope you find the answers you are looking for today. Enjoy life with less distraction and move through disruptions with more ease.

"I want you to say YES to things and mean it. I want you to say NO to things and own it." - Trina

Key points:

• Be stronger than distractions by turning off notifications, minimizing social media, and creating a focused work environment.

• Handle disruptions by addressing them in the moment, finding a resolution, and then setting them aside to focus on your priorities.

• Say yes to things and mean it, and say no to things and own it—especially when it comes to obligations, events, and activities that distract from your goals.

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