Dear Midlife...

Chasing Opposing Attachment Styles


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This episode turned into a little mini-therapy session for Trinity! It was fascinating to dig into her personal relationship with her ex as the perfect case study, in this instance, to unpack attachment styles.

Carla Crivaro, is so insightful as a trauma-informed and certified Sex, Love & Relationship Coach. Carla works with men and women (and apparently Podcast Hosts) to help them understand themselves and each other, sexually and relationally.

She really helps people connect to their emotions and tune into thier own behaviors and get curious about them...which is how she helps her clients to learn to trust themselves.

Today Carla teaches us:

  1. The inevitability that different attachment styles will be attracted to one another and how to navigate these differences.
  2. The different attachment styles are: Attachment styles: Secure attachment is characterized by strong relationships, trust, affection, resilience, and self-esteem. Anxious attachment styles crave intimacy but are afraid of getting close to other people. They seem needy and worry that their partner doesn’t really love them. Avoidant attachment styles have a hard time forming close relationships. They are independent and tend to hide their emotions and feel compelled to withdraw when people get too close. Disorganized attachment styles tend to be a mix of anxious and avoidant. While they crave intimacy and connection, they tend to avoid relationships.
  3. The fact that individuals will never be 100% secure in their attachment but will just able to manage their own nervous system in a better way. 
  4. The importance of being very specific and clear about your intentions with a partner.
  5. How women assume the role of caretaker because it helps us feel needed, but this can be disempowering as well and can cause us to lose our own identity.
  6. How to listen to your body rather than looking for red flags. When you have a true sense of security and trust yourself, you can stop running and actually get curious about your feelings.

Find more of Carla at:

Website | carlacrivaro.com

IG | the.sexuality.sanctuary

Please ensure that we are connected on social media and leave us a review letting us know what YOUR attachment style is!

FB | Dear Midlife and IG | @DearMidlife

FB | Shelby Bybee and IG | ShelbyBybee1 

FB | Trinity Greenfield and IG | Trinsong

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Dear Midlife...By Shelby Bybee and Trinity Greenfield

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