Church of Lazlo Podcasts

At some point in the last 24 hours, Lazlo decided to turn to Slimfast for all his professional advice. This can't end well. *The lines between being a "cool mom" and a "trashy mom" seem to be quite thin. *Doomscrolling! The dems want more judges, Biden wants few wars, and Matt Gaetz wants a time machine. *Self imposed drinking rules. Many have them, few enforce. *The Daily Mail has the "secrets to a happy relationship". Lazlo's advice is to get a divorce. *What are people really looking for in a dating profile? Butt pics. *Netflix is gonna teach us how to fall asleep but just as we started to relax, Lazlo found the A-Rod instagram story. *Thanks for stopping by. Don't forget to call your grandmother, she misses you. -Everybody Wang Chung!! 

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We're having some issues with the podcast on certain apps right now. They tell me it should be fixed very soon. So you may see this same podcast posted multiple times. *America has voted! Here are the best and worst states in the country. *Doomscrolling! Plenty of doom and gloom today but we also tell you how your dog could make you $20k richer and why you should NOT try to sell fake vaccine cards. *It's Wednesday! Get to Know Us! That's right, it's GTK Wednesday and we're talking about childhood trauma and how we all ended up so snobby. *What did you do in junior high to try and be cool? Did it work? Whatever it was, Jeriney says her wheelchair was cooler and she ain't trying to be funny. *More Americans than ever before are now saying they would be interested in an open relationship. We'll tell you how to make an open relationship work. Spoiler: You're better off cheating the old fashioned way. *Have a great day! Fake it til you make it fam! -Everybody Wang Chung!! 

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Adulting sucks, Lazlo is an actor, all the Doomscrolling we thought we knew is fake, drunk purchases aren't always a bad thing, and Lazlo defends the "Deep Like".  Sorry for the short description but the podcast is already enough!

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Yo! What if you start to hate your kids? Does anyone else worry about that? *If you're a guy, you'd probably assume that a woman would love it if you wrote a love song about her and it got super popular. You'd be wrong, creep. *Doomscrolling! Pooe Matt Gaetz :( Woman thinks she's passing a kidney stone but she ends up having a baby. There's a ketchup shortage. Low-rise jeans are coming back and some people aren't happy about it. Have you had COVID? How's your brain? *Tiger Woods was going pretty fast when he had his accident. *How long would you let a friend crash at your place? *The average person will only kiss about 24 people in their lifetime! *GET TO KNOW US! *Julia has given it a lot of thinking and she has decided that she does not want to be Miss Leavenworth Feet 2021. *The jobs that are most likely to win people over on dating apps. *That's all for today! It's about 90 degrees in this room right now so I'm gonna say goodbye. Have a great day/night! -Everybody Wang Chung!!!

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I hope you're in the mood to bs today because we certainly are. We start things off with three penises and sibling marriages. I'm serious. We talked about it for quite awhile. We were fascinated by it, *Slim is mad about the new shirt designs. We recap the HBO Q'Anon thing without totally spoiling it. *A survey says that the average American adult is in a bad mood for two hours a day. That seems high until you start to break life down. *Doomscrolling! Slimfast is a libertarian about these new vaccine passports but everyone else is in. More schools changing their names because we seem to be done with the forefather worship. Families get kicked out of their vacation hotel because it closed without warning. Brothers kill their entire family and themselves in some sort of suicide pact. A family is suing a baseball team because their dad choked to death on a taco. (You'll just have to listen) A woman claims she found a live bat in her bag of Costco carrots. Morgan Freeman wants you to get vaccinated. *People are sharing stories on our instagram about how they caught the partner cheating. *Men have a new way to beautify themselves. The guys are all in but the gals have mixed feelings. *Julia's got a list! What if popular businesses and products were more honest with their advertising? *An actual study by very smart people found that you're either a "one-night-stand" person or not. Whichever you are, you're gonna be for life. *The most paused movie scenes of all time. Yes, Total Recall is on the list. *When are you too old to use hip slang? This survey seems awfully generous and we're not sure we agree. *Thanks for listening. Remember, you are a great person. You truly are unique and important. Anyone who says otherwise just has their own stuff to work out. I know a lot of us are lonely and tired of this pandemic but it will get better. It always gets better. You are loved by people and we all want you to be great. They say smiling makes you feel better. Maybe it's true. I'm smiling alone in a small room right now. Why not? But whatever you do, put some swagger in your step. Remember that you're just as good as anyone else and probably better. Do your thing. Go be great. -Everybody Wang Chung!!  

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Welcome back! Hope you had a great easter. Slimfast starts things off by asking Lazlo some pretty uncomfortable questions. *Cash Me Outside girl is rich and we couldn't be happier for her. Why does the internet have to hate so much? *A woman got arrested for taking her April Fools joke too far, You ever take a prank too far? *Doomscrolling! Hope you saved all your old nintendo games and beanie babies because they are worth some serious loot! *Nick Wright is on the show. It's been a long time and we have a lot of ground to cover but Nick won't let this convo end without reminding us how dumb we are. *AI is officially aware and it's writing new Nirvana songs. *Lazlo has some advice that Julia needs to hear. *You know how stadiums get paid tons of money for naming rights? Well, one company wants to buy the naming rights to your living room. It's a pretty sweet deal. *We are out of here! Have a great day and don't forget to follow us on social and send us all your thoughts and complaints. -Everybody Wang Chung!!!

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What's up Fam?? Good to see you! Some would say that you shouldn't open your podcast with a ten minute discussion about men's cologne. Those people are wrong. *New post on @churchoflazlo Insta. What crime do we each look like we committed? Interesting how similar some of that responses are. Again, I need to make some changes. *Doomscrolling! We thought COVID was mostly behind us. CDC says doom and gloom is on the horizon. Biden wants you to wear a mask. Alcohol free bars are the new trend. We discuss and try to measure the pros and cons. Sharon Stone says she got a boob job that she didn't ask for. Great news right? She says no. Here's a scam worth trying. Open a travel agency, take people's money, use some of that money to disappear, get rich. It's really important that you disappear though. Can't stress that enough. *What motivates you to work out? High school reunion? Your ex is getting in shape? Here's the stuff that motivates us the most. *Anyone heard of this game called Butt Hurt? Julia has and we give it a whirl. Feelings do get hurt. *Lazlo says he doesn't cry at movies. I say bs. *Well, we learn something new everyday. Check out Slimfast and Julia's tattoos. *That's a wrap! Did you have fun? Are you listening on our new app? We work for Audacy now! Download the app if you haven't already. Subscribe to our podcast and then feel free to check out all the other content. Just as long as you listen to us first. Okay, I gotta get out of here. It's getting late and I ate today was a blueberry Pop Tart. I'm getting weak. Have a great night! See you tomorrow! -Everybody Wang Chung!! 

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