Church of Lazlo Podcasts

It's Friday! Holy hell! We had a blast today! We answer a bunch of personal questions from the text line and Insta, we Doomscroll for way too long! But the big news today? We learn about "Five Finger Julia"! I don't remember exactly what got us there today, but all four of us were crying laughing! Once that started, we were off to the races. Laughing about everything and getting way too personal. These are my favorite shows. I had a blast today. I'm in a great mood after walking out of that studio. I have no idea whether any of that energy is infectious but I really hope it is. I do want to make it clear that we all get along great. We take shots at each other but we laugh it off and we all really get along. We also did Country Psychic today and that was a lot of fun too. Who knows what the future holds but today was a great day for us and I hope you have a great weekend or weekday or whenever you listen to this. Please subscribe because it helps us out. Give us a rating. I never ask this of you and I won't bring it up again for awhile. As always, thanks for listening, Lazlo reminds you to stay positive. See you soon. Everybody Wang Chung!

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It's hard to write a description for the opening today. We discuss old commercial jingles, Lazlo's Cameo, and whether or not it makes any sense to buy digital movies. *An actual study done by an actual college with actual professors revealed that men are more likely to help women out if they have erect nipples. Yes! An actual college! In New York! *Doomscrolling! Good news! The vaccine seems to protect against all the known variants! Texas is totally open and people are totally going out. Prince William says the Royal Family is pretty racist. Sorry! He says they are NOT racist! *A guy wants his hot wife to stop dressing sexy around her 14 year old stepson. *We're playing along with Tik Tok today. What was that moment from your past that was so embarrassing, it still haunts you today? *Lazlo has advice about how to tell your kids you're going through a divorce. (Slimfast has advice too but it's not advisable) *Nick Wright is on the show and he has a bone to pick with our boss. *That's it! You've reached the end of the broadcast day. God bless America! Let's catch up tomorrow!  -Everybody Wang Chung!!

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We're back! Lazlo had to take the day off yesterday but we're back today and we've got more "intros"! That's right! The boss says we need more "intros" so he's gonna get them! *It's been a year since we all got locked down. What was the last thing you did before COVID? (Anyone else feel like it's been a lot longer than a year?) *Doomscrolling!! The Feds are looking for the pipe bomber and Julia cries on the air when she hears a sweet story about a ten-year-old. *It's Get To Know Us day and we've got a new "intro" for the boss!. *Should you go on twelve dates with someone before you have sex? An "expert" says yes but we say no. *We are a "Sad and Ugly Bunch" and we're embracing it! *We have a huge celebrity on the phone! *Let's use this time to go over everything we didn't get to today. *That's all she wrote! Have a great night and make sure your Apple Watch is waterproof before you go ice skating! -Everybody Wang Chung!!! 

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The richest woman in the world just married the luckiest man in the world. *We're defending canceled cartoon characters! *Doomscrolling! COVID relief bill passed and we're gonna get a check and buy a pretty sweet used moped! The Royal family drama is too much for Slimfast so Jeriney takes the wheel! *What if your partner asked you to be more controlling in the bedroom? *We could all me millionaires! We just have to move to Oklahoma and complete one simple tast! *It's International Women's Day and we're celebrating everything great about being a woman! *It's International Women's Day and we're talking about everything men do wrong. *Happy International Women's Day! If anyone knows where I can get a vaccine, please let me know. Take care. Try not to get canceled! Have a great day! Oh! And....Everybody Wang Chung!! 

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It's finally Friday and we've got a heck of a show for you today. *The feedback from the new cities is really starting to warm our hearts. (and slim's mom) *A pastor in Missouri is in trouble for saying wives need to be hot and stay that way. We go over what he said and try to figure out where he went wrong. *Doomscrolling! The usual stuff today including Q Shaman, crypto weirdness, and Tik Tokers making headlines. *Sarah Silverman apologized to Paris Hilton so we decided we should apologize to people from out pasts. *Another quick round of None of Your Business. *Nick Wright is on the show and he's braggins about being a Peloton master! He's also jealous that Julia got to talk to Bruno Mars. *Slimfast is a Country Psychic and the song is so sad today that he brings Jeriney to tears. *That's it! It's Friday! I'll quit wasting your time and hit "post". Have a great weekend! -Everbody Wang Chung!!

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All I said was that Jeriny is a happy drunk! I wasn't saying that she's only fun when she's drunk! Everything I say is taken out of context. Love you Jeriney. *A woman drives her roommate insane by playing the same song over and over on repeat. It ended with an arrest an some assault charges. *Doomscorlling! Biden vs Abbott! Today is the day Trump is supposed to take back power! (If you believe in Q'Anon) *Cheerleading isn't woke so it might be going away. *Women love a man in uniform and men love taking their kids to breastaurants. *Julia is about to interview Bruno Mars. We've come up with something for her to work in. *Worst interviews we've had in our careers. We've got audio for Julia's and it's amazing. Looking for captions of our selfie on Instagram. *Lazlo paid to rent another crappy movie last night. *Lazlo would appreciate it if you stopped reminding him about the upcoming Lou Gehrig day. *We are out of here! Go do something fun! It's spring! -Everybody Wang Chung!!

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Well, well, well. Look who decided to check in. There's literally tens of thousands of podcasts out there but you chose to hang out with us. Lazlo paid to watch a documentary last night and now we all want to be old and retired in Florida. *A listener messaged us on Instagram and wanted to get everyone's opinion. He claims to know for a fact that his best friend's wife has cheated on him. Does he tell his friend? *Doomscrolling! Biden went to Texas and Dolly got vaccinated. We got really distracted during Doomscrolling today. We covered a little bit of everything and absolutely nothing at the same time. *Julia is on Buzzfeed! *Get to Know Us! We got some serious questions today. What ended your last relationship and what career do you wish you'd chosen? *Slimfast invited himself to his brother's house and now his brother is backing out. Lazlo says he never should have invited himself in the first place. *A couple guys in Australia got lost at sea on an inflatable mattress. *We're out of here! -Everybody Wang Chung!! 

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Julia went to a wedding and Slimfast believes he was created by aliens. *There's two kinds of people, those who start the idle chit chat and those who end it. Then there's Lazlo. *Headlines! Cheetos dust leads to an arrest, an Alabama woman paints a goat, and a lot of kids haven't been going to school this year. *Armie Hammer left something behind at his old place. *Lazlo was a special dishwasher. *The Boy Scouts are paying settlements and they're raising part of the money by selling Norman Rockwell paintings? *A reporter happens to be live when a police gun fight breaks out and he barely notices. *Lazlo wants a bodyguard but not for the normal reasons. *Ladies, the internet has found yet another way for you to make some extra cash during the pandemic. *Julia pissed off a bunch of Disney fans. *That's all for today! Can't wait to catch up tomorrow! -Everybody Wang Chung!! 

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When did liquor get delicious? Root Beer Schnapps in the 80's?  We argue that the science of making liquor taste like candy was not perfected until recently. *If you can prove that you've got a super power, you can win $250k. This is a serious thing. A lot of people have applied. No one has won. You can check it out on our twitter @churchoflazlo *Headlines! Biden's droppin bombs! J&J is dropping vaccines! Cuomo is dropping apologies! Hasbro is dropping "Potato Head Person" and bringing back "Mr and Mrs"! *Has a documentary evey made you love a celebrity? Jeriney spent two and half hours this weekend watching Billie Eilish grow up and now she thinks they're besties. *Is it possible for a man to reach middle age and not be accused of having a mid-life-crisis? *Wanna start an OnlyFans? Apparently Ohio State had a seminar for that. *Nick Wright is on the show and he gives us bts details about his marital woes. *That's all for today! Thanks for the memories! -Everybody Wang Chung!  

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Heck of a show today! Julia helped us give back to the community and we're super proud of her! Lazlo wants to move to North Korea. *We practice "teasing" today because our boss says we do a lousy job. I resent that. I think I'm a great tease. *Lady GaGa's dogs were dognapped and she's offering $500k for their safe return! *Doomscorlling! Doctors are advising against Gwyneth Paltrow's medical advice. Good news from Washington state for people who like illicit drugs. *We're taking questions today for "None of Your Business". Winner gets a box of old stuff from Slim's office. *Huge celebrity is on the show today and he's got beef with one of our significant others. (Sounds confusing but you'll just have to listen) *Eighteen years on the air and we've never once played FMK. Let's give it a go. *Do people ask for your advice about specific things because you're knowledgeable? Let's see what everyone on the show thinks their good at. *Have a great weekend! Don't sleep in too late on Saturday and Sunday. You'll regret it. Wake up w early and go grocery shopping or something. Thanks for listening!  -Everybody Wang Chung!

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