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Codie and Tommy Oliver met, got engaged, got married and created a blockbuster television show together in the time that most couples start leaving a toothbrush at one another’s apartments. Their show, Black Love, is about to start it’s fourth season on OWN. It is a beautiful docu series that shatters stereotypes and showcases incredible love stories. Creating something from scratch is never easy, but it’s even more challenging when you’re doing it with your partner.
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Bestselling author Caitlin Moran has been married to her husband Pete for 25 years. When Caitlin first book, How to Be a Woman, turned into a global phenomenon, Pete stepped back from his successful career as a journalist to pick up the slack at home and take care of their two daughters. Caitlin credits Pete with helping her career thrive, for not being her glass ceiling. This episode is a beautiful portrait of the middle of a marriage, of how we sustain love over the decades, of how we support one another, of how sometimes we schedule sex in a calendar invite and why that is completely OK.
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Committed is back for season five on October 14th!
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You guys might already know our guests today—Megan Mullally and Nick Offerman. Interviews with Megan and Nick usually kick off by talking about how they’re something completely out of the ordinary—a Hollywood couple that has stayed together for about two decades. I love these articles because they use language like they’re describing aliens or pandas mating in captivity in a suburban American zoo. In Hollywood terms, a love story that lasts longer than the production of a single movie is considered successful. But Nick and Megan do have a secret, a reason they think they’ve stayed together so long: They commit to truly being together. Also...they like one another. And liking your spouse tends to go a long way.
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In 2016 Shapearl Wells was ready to end her marriage of 19 years to her husband Brent. Then her son was killed by gun violence in Chicago. In the worst moment of her life she realized that Brent was her safe place, the only person who could support her as she embarked on an investigation into Courtney’s death, an investigation that would eventually become the basis for the podcast Somebody. In the months and years following Courtney’s death Shapearl and Brent discovered a new way to be together that was shaped by their shared history, their friendship and their faith.
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Shazi and Joe met while Shazi was building her company, the organic baby brand Happy Family Organics. Their storybook romance completely changed when their first child Zane was diagnosed with regressive autism. Shazi and Joe were forced to re-examine everything about their lives and their marriage to figure out how to parent Zane. But they did it; their family didn’t just survive, they thrived. Their family motto is “we win,” because they refuse to give up.
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Pregnancy is difficult no matter who you are. But it can be even harder when society sees you one way, pigeonholes you, thinks they know exactly who you are. Spencer and Kelly’s journey to parenthood was a long one...and a beautiful one. Spencer identifies as a queer male. His husband Kelly also identifies queer. And even though Spencer is also transgender and had gone through a medical transition to present as a man, he was still able to carry their baby. Kelly and Spencer’s story first appeared on the website MotherMag.com and my friend Erin Fehrer did a beautiful job documenting the two of them becoming parents to an incredible little boy named Alexis. That’s how we found them. Today they’re dads, raising Alexis, living in Sydney, Australia and navigating the very real ups and downs of marriage after having a baby.
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Nick and Hana met as Marines on active duty and got married fast. They hardly had a honeymoon or a courtship. Demanding military jobs and having young children took a toll on their relationships. But Nick was also suffering from the aftershocks of something that happened before he met Hana. He was a Marine in Fallujah, Iraq during Operation Phantom Fury and still suffered PTSD from it years later. Hana and Nick had to learn how to confront his PTSD and traumatic brain injury together in order to save their marriage.
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It was fitting that we did today’s interview during the COVID-19 pandemic because it’s different from the shows we usually do, but it makes sense in the strange new world. Hannah and Kelty Luber aren’t married to each other….they’re twin sisters. Both of them are married to men, but they have chosen to live together on a farm outside of Portland, Oregon. On the farm they share their lives and their parenting duties. They’re twins...they’re incredibly close, but this decision wasn’t just about them—first they had to convince their husbands to join their families together.
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