Last month, Dr. Adam Miller joined Dr. Finlayson-Fife and Room for Two subscribers for an interactive discussion about love and loss.

The conversation was simply too good to keep contained on the Room for Two podcast, so we are releasing it here today on Conversations with Dr. Jennifer for EVERYONE to enjoy. This beautiful exchange of ideas between Dr. Finlayson-Fife and Dr. Miller will change the way you think about love in the best possible way.

Dr. Adam Miller is a professor of philosophy at Collin College in McKinney, Texas. He earned a BA in Comparative Literature from Brigham Young University and an MA and PhD in Philosophy from Villanova University.

He is the author of over ten books, including “Letters to a Young Mormon”  and “Original Grace”, he serves as the current director of the Mormon Theology seminar. You can learn more about Adam and his work HERE.

Bumping up against the limits of our time, energy, and resources is one of life’s greatest frustrations.

In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Dr. Dave and Ashley of the On Call with Dr. Dave podcast to talk through the impact of high-demand careers on relationships and the important role that self-awareness, honest communication, and conscious choosing play in keeping resentment and entitlement at bay.

Collaboration and partnership

Important factors to discuss before pursuing a high-demand career while in a relationship

Combating entitlement and resentment 

Keeping play and eroticism alive in marriage 

**Click HERE to learn more about Room for Two!**

Today we are releasing the recording of Dr. Finlayson-Fife's 2022 Restore presentation, "Developing Sexual Wholeness." In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife discusses the integration of spirituality and sexuality from an LDS theological perspective. She also walks through the three stages of development (Egocentric, Social, and Self-Authoring) and how each developmental stage shapes how we think about ourselves, our sexuality, and God.

You can watch the video of this presentation HERE.

In this recent Facebook Live, Zach and Darcy Spafford of the Thrive Beyond Pornography podcast joined Dr. Finlayson-Fife to share their personal experience working through unwanted pornography use in their marriage and how after years of feeling stuck and frustrated, they were able to shift gears and make meaningful, lasting progress in their relationship to pornography and their relationship to each other.

Listen to the full episode to learn more about:

Self-authoring and the importance of claiming your life and choices

The problem with compliance/defiance framing

Role-based marriage vs choice-based marriage

Eroticism in marriage 

Approaching difficult conversations with curiosity

A recording of this conversation is also available on our YouTube channel. 

Our bodies and our ability to experience love and joy through them are loving gifts from a loving God.

Sometimes we teach important principles like modesty and chastity in ways that promote an entirely different idea–in ways that imply that our bodies and sexuality are burdens to be overcome and obstacles to our spirituality.

In this NEW podcast episode, I join Aubrey and Tim Chaves from the Faith Matters podcast to talk about modesty and how we can relate to and cherish our bodies so as to experience deeply embodied joy through them.

Listen to the full episode to learn more about: 

Problematic understandings of modesty

Why modesty is such a culturally charged topic

Sexual self-mastery

Healthy ways to talk to youth about modesty and sexuality

Stages of moral development

The gift of sexual conservatism

Triangulation–is a concept you’re likely familiar with, even if you’re not familiar with the term.

If you’ve ever been frustrated with your spouse and turned to a friend to complain, you’ve triangulated.

Triangles aren’t always a bad thing–seeking wise input from a therapist or thoughtful friend can help you see yourself in your relationship more clearly.  You can use that insight to bring more stability to the dyad through your own growth. But, there are plenty of unhealthy types of triangles as well (affairs, finding validation from family or friends) and when we turn to those (usually in an effort to justify our own immature behavior) we prevent ourselves and our relationships from growing in important ways.

In this NEW podcast episode, I join Heather Frazier of the Pivot Parenting Podcast to talk about triangulation in families and the negative impact that triangulation has on our children and our marriages.

Listen to the full episode to learn:

* What triangulation is and why it is so tempting

* The three classic roles in triangled relationships—victim, perpetrator, and rescuer (and how we toggle between roles at different times)

* How to distinguish between healthy triangles and unhealthy ones

* How triangulation is related to codependency

* How to break the pattern of triangulation when it’s undermining your relationships

When a marriage crumbles, we see a life we once hoped for crumble along with it.  

In this NEW podcast episode [“Differentiation and Divorce”], Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Hyo North of the Leading With Grace podcast to talk about how differentiation can help those working through the complexities of separation or divorce navigate forward with wisdom and maturity.

* Collusive alliances and how they keep us stuck 

* Differentiation as it relates to divorce

* Forgiveness  

* Forging capacity in the face of crisis 

It’s one thing to learn about differentiation and emotional maturity, but it’s another thing entirely to actually live it. 

Stepping into the deep anxiety and uncertainty of defining a self that others may not validate is a terrifying prospect, but it’s what must be done for people and relationships to evolve and grow. 

In this NEW podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Rhonda Farr to talk through two listener questions about desire dynamics and how to navigate the painful reality of having a spouse who is not interested in creating a better sexual relationship. 

During this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife expertly models how the higher desire partner can maturely handle themselves in difficult and productive conversations about sexuality.

Listen to the full episode to learn more about:

-Desire Dynamics

-Duty Sex

-Differentiation

-Emotional and Sexual Maturity 

If you found this episode helpful, consider enrolling in Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s Enhancing Sexual Intimacy Course. This course was designed to help couples better understand and navigate the challenges in their intimate relationship. 

When being true to ourselves jeopardizes belonging to our group, it can be tempting to live falsely in an attempt to keep others happy with us. Yet we cannot be at peace when we chronically mask who we really are.

Healthy ways to address the discrepancy between societal norms and divergent realities 

Finding peace in painful circumstances 

How love is the pathway to truth

How to communicate effectively with those who believe differently 

Stages of spiritual development 

Navigating mixed-orientation marriages 

Grief and loss as inherent to life 

The silver lining that comes from not fitting the mold of a group 

Zack and Kelly’s marriage has been a relatively untroubled one.