Doing It Together: Making Sense of Low Libido, Sex, and Intimacy in Marriage.

Doing It Together: Making Sense of Low Libido, Sex, and Intimacy in Marriage.

By Janna Denton-Howes: Marriage Coach | Sex Educator | Low Libido ExpertSociety & CultureHealth & FitnessRelationshipsSexuality
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Doing It Together: Making Sense of Low Libido, Sex, and Intimacy in Marriage. episodes

  • Anxiety & Sex: What Men and Women Feel | Ep. 182

    This episode provides an update on what Janna and her husband are working on in their sex life. Both talk about how anxiety affects their sexual experience in different ways.


    Janna shares her anxieties about:

    • trying to have an orgasm and it not progressing
    • getting in her head about what “should” happen next
    • being worried about his experience and if he's "getting bored”


    Dwayne shares his anxieties about:

    • being a “perfect” partner and feeling inadequate
    • trying to communicate to connect
    • the progression of moving from something that feels good into “What to do next?”


    This episode will remind you that you aren't alone in your sexual struggles and that all couples are a work in progress in the bedroom.

    Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.


    Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.


    Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

    32 min
  • Navigating Sex Addiction as a Black Man - with Dr. Kervins Clement | Ep. 181

    My podcast guest is Dr. Kervins Clement and his story is one that I hear about all the time- where a dependency on porn use and masturbation is justified as helping the relationship when, in fact, it often does the opposite. 


    In this episode we explore:


    1. How Kervins’ own recovery shaped the way he now works with men and couples.
    2. What his research revealed about the role of culture and history in treating Black men with sex addiction.
    3. Why guilt and remorse don’t reliably stop lying and secrecy in addiction.
    4. What partners actually need after betrayal and where their focus often goes too soon.


    This is a thoughtful, nuanced conversation that isn’t just about sex addiction- it’s about honesty, courage and what healing truly requires.


    You can find Dr. Kervins Clement on:

    YouTube @DrKervinsClement

    Instagram @drkervinsclement

    Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.


    Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.


    Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

    1 hr 9 min
  • RE-AIR: Details of a Sex Life Two Years Post Doing It Together - with Justin & Sandra | Ep. 180

    We're re-releasing one of our most listened to episodes! If you’ve been curious about what the concepts of Doing It Together can do for your sex life and marriage in the long term, you'll want to listen to Justin and Sandra's story.


    Married for 19 years, they took Doing It Together two years ago and they graciously share VERY specific details about what their relationship and sex life look like now. They open up about how they’ve learned to talk, play, remain curious, and change things up through life’s ups and downs.


    They also share how their marriage has changed outside the bedroom and the routines they’ve incorporated to keep their connection at the forefront of their marriage.


    You can listen to Justin and Sandra's personal stories by listening to these previous episodes:


    Justin's Story in Episode 82

    Sandra's Story in Episode 74


    The Michelle Mays episode on Betrayal Trauma can be found here: Episode 108

    Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.


    Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.


    Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

    55 min
  • Why Trying Harder Is Making Your Sex Life Worse | Ep. 179

    There is no shortcut to heal from a toxic world that has tricked us into thinking sex is just a series of acts designed to physically stimulate us. The only way through is to slow down, unlearn and heal- not just for your marriage but for your well-being. 


    It’s understanding safety, not just physically, but emotionally.

    It’s questioning the model of sex you were handed, instead of trying to perform it better.

    It’s rebuilding trust with your own body.


    And, when you’re doing this together, it’s learning how to create a sexual environment that doesn’t require forcing, convincing, or enduring.

    This is exactly what I talk about in the podcast episode today- why trying harder is often the very thing that makes sex feel worse, not better.

    Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.


    Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.


    Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

    21 min
  • For Men: How to Reduce Pressure for Better Sex - with Justin | Ep. 178

    Justin joins me for a foundational episode in which we zoom out and discuss the role that men play when their wives have “low libido”. 


    He starts off by sharing how he felt when his wife stopped wanting to have sex with him- the feelings of confusion and worrying if he had done something wrong.


    Then we take a journey through the unique ways men can contribute to a great sex life, how to create a comfortable, pressure-free environment and the work they can do outside of the bedroom.


    I’m so grateful to work alongside Justin in supporting men and if you’d like to hear more of his story, you can listen to Episode 82 as well as Episode 148 with his wife, Sandra.

    Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.


    Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.


    Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

    1 hr 1 min
  • Low Libido & Bad Sex- What Women Don't Say | Ep. 177

    Many women I talk to struggle enjoying physical touch during sex. They don’t know their experience can be any other way so they continue trying to enjoy things they don’t like and then label themselves as “non-sexual”. 


    In our conversation, my husband and I discuss:

    • why so many women push themselves to initiate or say yes even when their body is clearly uncomfortable

    • why discomfort is so often normalized through culture, media, and silence

    • the real fears women carry about speaking up and the consequences they’re trying to avoid

    • why this can feel shocking or confusing for men when the truth finally comes out


    If having a closer, more connected and joyful sex life is something you want in your relationship, this episode is an important one to listen to.

    Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.


    Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.


    Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

    50 min
  • The Power of a Sex Reset | Ep. 176

    In today’s episode, I’m pulling back the curtain on one of the most important elements of moving towards freedom in your relationship and that is…a reset from sex.


    It’s something that you may have heard many times on the podcast in interviews with alumni of Doing It Together but it’s the first time I’ve addressed it directly.


    If you are tired of the mental energy sex is taking up in your life right now, I highly encourage you to listen to this conversation.

    Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.


    Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.


    Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

    47 min
  • When Your Husband Wants Sex and You Feel Anxious | Ep. 175

    Today on the podcast I recorded a short and sweet solo episode for you but really it’s a love-letter to my former self.


    Anxiety (just a different term for “fear”) is telling you something and if you are feeling it around sex, there is something to learn. And I promise you, it’s not that you are broken and that nothing will ever work. I used to believe that too but that thought will only keep you stuck.


    Listen and trust yourself and please, please, please get some support for this. It’s not going to change on it’s own.



    Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.


    Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.


    Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

    26 min
  • The Expectations for Sex on Special Occasions | Ep. 174

    Since we’re headed into a time of the year where there may be some extra space as a couple, I thought it would be a good idea to talk about expectations around sex and special occasions. 


    I know this happens more often with birthdays and vacations but it’s possible that in the lull between Christmas and New Years some pressure could creep in.


    In this short episode, we discuss why this happens, the harm it can cause and what to do instead. Plus we talk about what gifts husbands should never get their wives 🙂.

    Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.


    Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.


    Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

    22 min
  • Why Sex Often Doesn't Feel Good For Women | Ep. 173

    The idea that men are so simple to please and women are a difficult maze of sensitive knobs and dials, often leaves female pleasure forgotten about.


    But what if something else was happening? What if our culture has only taught men and women about men’s bodies and pleasure? What if women’s genitals and orgasms felt impossibly difficult because we are all trying to approach them like men’s? 


    This is what we discussed on the podcast this week- sharing openly our current challenges with my partner learning my body as well as the common feeling amongst women that we don’t work properly or that we’re broken.


    And to make it practical, we also included some basic concepts to understand when approaching the clitoris.


    We didn’t hold anything back in this 30 minute episode and I hope you can find a quiet, private moment to join the conversation.


    Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.


    Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.


    Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

    33 min

About Doing It Together: Making Sense of Low Libido, Sex, and Intimacy in Marriage.

From the publisher's feed

Doing It Together is about empowering women and men to heal from cultural messages so that they can discover true pleasure and connection in their sexual relationship and marriage. This podcast…

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