Doing It Together: Making Sense of Low Libido, Sex, and Intimacy in Marriage.

Doing It Together: Making Sense of Low Libido, Sex, and Intimacy in Marriage.

By Janna Denton-Howes: Marriage Coach | Sex Educator | Low Libido ExpertSociety & CultureHealth & FitnessRelationshipsSexuality
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Doing It Together: Making Sense of Low Libido, Sex, and Intimacy in Marriage. episodes

  • IVF, Intimacy, and the Breaking Point That Changed Everything - with Reese | Ep. 162

    In Part 2 of Reese’s episode, he opens up about the emotional rollercoaster of trying for children, including multiple rounds of IVF and the strain it placed on intimacy in his marriage. Disconnected from his feelings, he carried a lot of anger and tension, making everything feel heavy and difficult.


    After reaching a breaking point, Reese stumbled across Janna’s podcast during a late-night search. For the first time, he heard other men share their struggles with intimacy in marriage, and their stories resonated deeply. He recognized how his screen addiction was impacting his relationship and explains how he’s now working to rebuild a healthier space for his wife, his family, and himself to thrive.

    Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.


    Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.


    Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

    39 min
  • Secrets, Screens, and the Struggle for Real Connection - with Reese | Ep. 161

    Reese learned at a young age that secrets stay safe behind locked doors. When he discovered adult images online, what started as curiosity quickly turned into a regular habit—and soon, a strong screen addiction took hold.


    Over time, the influence of these images began shaping how he viewed relationships with women. He became fixated on unrealistic performance expectations, while true emotional connection slipped further and further out of reach.


    Caught in a cycle of shame and pressure, Reese had no idea what was driving his struggles—until he came across Janna’s work.


    Listen to Part 1 of Reese’s story now, and stay tuned for Part 2 next week.

    Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.


    Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.


    Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

    32 min
  • The Wake-Up Call That Changed His Marriage - with David (Part 2) | Ep. 160

    In Part 2 of David’s story, he opens up about the early days of his marriage and the life event that triggered a sharp decline in their sex life. He remembers feeling lonely but not fully understanding why. Although he and his wife had many conversations about what she was experiencing, her perspective never quite clicked for him.


    That changed when she began listening to Janna’s podcast and finally found the words to explain what she was feeling. Once David started listening to other people’s stories, the pieces began to fall into place. He realized he had carried negative patterns into their marriage—patterns that blocked true intimacy and emotional safety. In this episode, David reflects on what he learned, not only as a therapist but also as a husband.

    Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.


    Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.


    Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

    38 min
  • How a Psychotherapist Came to Understand His Own Intimacy Struggles - with David | Ep. 159

    David, a Mexican American, grew up navigating the influence of two cultures—his Hispanic, Catholic upbringing and the American, white culture around him. He describes his Hispanic roots as warm, physical, and affectionate, yet completely silent when it came to conversations about sex. While his parents assured him he could talk to them about anything, the unspoken rule was clear: sex was a taboo topic.


    At just eight years old, David discovered his father’s hidden pornography stash. That early exposure deeply shaped his perceptions of women and his ideas about what relationships should look like. Years later, when he met his wife in college, the hidden pressures and distorted beliefs he carried began to strain their intimacy. It wasn’t until he joined Janna’s program that David finally began to recognize—and untangle—the negative effects of those early experiences.


    Tune in next week to hear Part 2 of David's story.

    Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.


    Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.


    Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

    40 min
  • Why Safety Matters More Than Libido - with Natalie | E. 158

    When Natalie met her husband, they clicked instantly. After marriage, their sex life was good at first, but over time her desire began to fade. Things worsened after having kids—she describes her husband’s advances as “feeling like another need to fill.” He urged her to “fix” her low libido, but deep down, she knew it wasn’t her hormones that needed repairing. Something felt off, though she couldn’t quite pinpoint it—she just knew his advances left her feeling gross and cringy.


    Around this time, Natalie discovered Janna’s podcast and immediately recognized what had been missing in her relationship: safety. Through the Doing It Together program, she felt validated and reassured that her instincts had been right all along. As her trust in her intuition grew, she and her husband uncovered behaviours that had been off-base. Now, they’re working together to create a safer, healthier space for both of them.

    Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.


    Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.


    Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

    47 min
  • The Real Reason Sex Started to Feel Off - with John (Part 2) | Ep. 157

    In Part 2 of John’s story, he shares how he met his wife online and how quickly their relationship progressed. They moved in together almost immediately, and he describes their sex life early on as “frequent, enjoyable, and exciting.” But over time, the honeymoon phase faded. Their sexual connection began to feel like something they should do, rather than something they wanted to do.


    Even though they shared a deep emotional bond, John started questioning whether he was in the right relationship. He made efforts to reignite the spark—planning date nights, giving massages, even trying to schedule intimacy—but the distance between them only grew as he gradually pulled away.


    Sensing the shift, his wife suggested they listen to some of Janna’s podcasts together. That led them to join Doing It Together, and for John, it was eye-opening. He began to recognize how deeply cultural conditioning had shaped both of their experiences. He now understands that “fixing” their sex life isn’t just about physical connection—it’s about healing and growing together on multiple levels.

    Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.


    Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.


    Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

    35 min
  • Exploring the Backlash of Performance Anxiety - with John | Ep. 156

    As a teenager, John felt uneasy about the new sensations of arousal in his changing body. He wasn’t sure how to handle them, which led to persistent discomfort, performance anxiety, and awkward early attempts at intimacy with girls.


    During his university years, John moved past some of his self-doubt—but his behavior in relationships took a troubling turn. He describes feeling like he was “trying to make up for lost time,” and admits he didn’t treat his girlfriends with the respect they deserved. Even though it felt awful, he found himself cheating and sabotaging his relationships.


    In this episode, Janna and John unpack those complicated feelings and explore what was really driving his actions.


    Tune in next week for Part 2 of John’s story.

    Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.


    Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.


    Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

    35 min
  • Healing The Secret Strain in a Picture-Perfect Marriage - with Andrea (Part 2) | Ep. 155

    When Andrea met her husband, they shared an instant connection. She describes their early intimacy as “fun, easy, and pressure-free.” But after they got married, things began to shift. Sex became complicated, and Andrea started to wonder if something was wrong with her. She found herself checking the calendar, counting the days, and feeling her anxiety grow.


    On the outside, their relationship looked perfect—but behind closed doors, the tension was building. They tried individual counseling, couples therapy, and Andrea read endlessly about low libido in women, searching for answers. But nothing changed… until she found Janna.


    For the first time, Andrea was introduced to a different perspective—one where intimacy could look and feel entirely new. Hear what she discovered, and why she calls Janna’s Doing It Together program truly life-changing.

    Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.


    Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.


    Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

    34 min
  • Empowered or Objectified? 90's Girl Power Through Teen Eyes - with Andrea | Ep. 154

    Andrea, now 37, grew up in the 1990s, shaped by the influence of pop icons like Britney Spears and the Spice Girls. Back then, “girl power” looked like tube tops, perfect hair, and using every ounce of energy to grab—and most importantly, keep—the attention of boys.


    As a teenager, Andrea poured her focus into chasing male approval. But when the attention finally came, and kissing or more was expected to maintain it, the magic disappeared. The chase felt exhausting, and the physical side of things felt more like a performance than pleasure. Deep down, she wasn’t enjoying any of it. Confused and disappointed, Andrea started to wonder if something was wrong with her.


    Tune in next week for Part 2 of Andrea’s story—where things start to shift.

    Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.


    Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.


    Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

    36 min
  • A 20-Year Journey Through Painful Intimacy - with Shannon (Part 2) | Ep. 153

    In Part 2 of her episode, Shannon opens up about the next chapter of her story. After meeting her husband, she eagerly took the lead in their relationship—from their first kiss to exploring intimacy together. Remaining a virgin until marriage was deeply important to her, so they waited until their wedding night to have intercourse.


    But the moment she had waited for her entire life turned out to be excruciatingly painful—and the pain didn’t go away. For two years, Shannon silently endured, until she was finally diagnosed with vulvodynia, a chronic condition causing pain around the vulva. What was supposed to be a joyful part of marriage became a painful obligation. She was overwhelmed with guilt and shame, feeling as though she had failed as a wife.


    Eventually, she found an incredible pelvic floor specialist who helped relieve much of the physical pain—but the emotional and sexual disconnection lingered. Despite her efforts, she still didn’t feel desire. Over the next 20 years, they struggled. A sex therapist left Shannon feeling blamed and broken. They even tried visiting sex clubs, hoping that new experiences might reignite her interest. Nothing worked, and Shannon sank into depression.


    Then she found Janna.


    For the first time, Shannon felt truly seen, heard, and understood. With Janna’s support, her relationship has completely transformed. Now, Shannon looks forward to the next 20 years with her husband—hopeful, empowered, and finally at peace.

    Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.


    Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.


    Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

    49 min

About Doing It Together: Making Sense of Low Libido, Sex, and Intimacy in Marriage.

From the publisher's feed

Doing It Together is about empowering women and men to heal from cultural messages so that they can discover true pleasure and connection in their sexual relationship and marriage. This podcast…

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