Doing It Together: Making Sense of Low Libido, Sex, and Intimacy in Marriage.

In this honest and vulnerable two-part episode, Carey shares the hidden struggles she faced with intimacy throughout her 30-year marriage while raising seven children.

At just nine years old, Carey was exposed to adult magazines that distorted her understanding of intimacy. By 13, she found herself in relationships where intimacy felt more like something expected of her than something she chose.

Married at 21 while still finishing school, she quickly began to see sex and intimacy as a burden—an obligation she was expected to fulfill. Guilt weighed heavily on her for not wanting it, and resentment grew toward her husband’s repeated attempts to initiate. Eventually, Carey stopped touching him altogether, leading to mounting tension and emotional distance in their marriage.

In her search for answers, Carey turned to countless “experts,” only to be met with confusion and misinformation that left her feeling even more broken and isolated. Meanwhile, her husband was left wondering if she truly loved him.

But that wasn’t the end of their story.

🎧 Tune in now to hear Carey’s raw and relatable journey—and don’t miss next week’s episode, where she shares the turning point that changed everything.

Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.

Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.

Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

In this reair of Ep. 111, Janna chats with Michael Kaufman, the author of The Time Has Come: Why Men Must Join the Gender Equality Revolution. Michael, a renowned advisor, activist, and keynote speaker, shares his insights on how traditional male roles in the bedroom and beyond often don’t benefit women. They dive into why it's crucial for men to confront their own privilege and engage in open dialogues about gender equality.

Michael also discusses the rapid shifts in societal roles for both men and women. By listening to women's voices and addressing their own defensiveness, men can better contribute to a more equitable world. Tune in to hear Michael's innovative approaches for transforming men's lives and fostering positive change for a more equitable society.

REFERENCES:

Michael Kaufman: https://michaelkaufman.com/the-time-has-come/

Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.

Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.

Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

Romance novels promised Amy that her man would always know exactly what to do. The church assured her that sex would be wonderful once she was married. But when her first wedding night was filled with pain instead of pleasure, she was shocked.

And the pain never went away. Over the course of her 30-year marriage, it evolved from undiagnosed endometriosis to rheumatoid arthritis to menopause. She felt exhausted, dismissed, and unhappy, but continued to push herself to be intimate with her husband—every other day for 30 years—believing it was simply her duty as his wife.

After searching for answers in books, through medical professionals, and online, she finally found Janna, and everything started to make sense. Tune in to hear what Amy learned, and how she finally took control of her body, her feelings, and her desires.

Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.

Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.

Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

One of the most common questions we get is: "How do I talk to my kids about sex?"

In today’s episode, Janna sits down with her teammates, Melissa C. and Melissa W., to discuss how they approach these conversations with their kids, whose ages range from 6 to 21.

They share stories from their own childhoods, reflecting on how they navigated these topics largely on their own, and the education they wish they had received. The conversation touches on the fears they had to overcome to talk openly with their own children about sex, and how those discussions have gone. Lastly, they talk about how they’ve chosen to share about the importance of their own intimate experiences with their kids and their hopes and dreams for their children's future relationships.

Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.

Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.

Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

It’s been a year since Chris and his wife of 21 years took the Doing It Together course, and he’s here to give an honest update on how things are going.

For two decades, Chris and his wife struggled with intimacy, trying everything they could think of to improve their connection. From counseling and self-help books to even participating in a university sex study, they explored every option. Despite their efforts, nothing seemed to work. Chris found himself spiraling with thoughts like, “Is she cheating?” “Does she not find me attractive?” and “Does she still love me?”

Now, after celebrating their 21st anniversary, Chris reflects on the changes they’ve experienced over the past year since learning from Janna. He explains how their sex life has transformed and why it’s dramatically better than its ever been.

Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.

Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.

Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

Luke and his wife have been married for 25 years and have struggled with sex through most of that time. Things changed after kids and his wife experienced post-partum depression. Her libido plumeted and didn’t come back. Luke took the stance that this was her problem to solve and waited for years for her to 'fix' herself.

It wasn’t until they found Janna and the Doing It Together program that Luke learned how big of a role he played in the lack of intimacy in their relationship. He shares what he’s learned about empathy, compassion, communication. 

Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.

Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.

Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

Janna discovered Jaime and Josh through their shared Instagram profile, @marriageishappening, and was so moved by their marriage story that she invited them to join her on the podcast.

Married at 21 with four kids soon after, they initially adhered to traditional gender roles—Jaime stayed at home while Josh worked outside the house. Jaime, an extrovert, describes early parenthood as a time filled with "shock and horror." She found herself isolated in a basement suite with no help, limited adult interaction, and minimal support from her husband. She felt sad, lonely, and disconnected from both her mind and body. Meanwhile, Josh, an introvert, struggled in his demanding social work position and came home feeling drained, unsure how to support his wife and children in a meaningful way.

After years of unfulfillment, Jaime reached a breaking point, contemplating self-harm, death, and even leaving her marriage. It wasn’t until she realized she needed to focus on her own well-being and make changes that things began to shift. But when she embraced newfound joy and freedom, Josh struggled to adjust. His defensiveness and emotional immaturity made it hard for him to process the changes she was going through.

Together, Jaime and Josh share how they’ve made progress in their marriage by redefining their roles and discovering a new way to be together.

Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.

Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.

Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

Keith continues his story from Episode 134, diving deeper into his experience of starting the Doing It Together (DIT) program with his wife. Having gone through his own therapy, Keith thought he was way ahead of the game when he began DIT. However, he quickly realized the role he played in his relationship dynamic was much more complex than he had originally thought. In this episode, Keith shares the valuable lessons he learned about processing emotions, truly listening to and understanding his partner, and rethinking what it really means to be a man.

Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.

Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.

Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

In this two-part episode, Keith shares the first part of his story. Growing up as a child of color, Keith learned early on what was and wasn’t acceptable to express around his family and friends, especially the men and boys. While the women in his life supported his artistic side and sensitivity, Keith feared being labeled as weak or ridiculed by the men. His culture taught him that toughness and strength were the key qualities of being a "real" man.

As a result, Keith struggled with his emotions in his marriage. He longed for a deeper connection with his wife, but nothing he'd been taught from tough-guy culture seemed to work. Feelings of confusion and resentment grew, and he felt rejected and unwanted. When his wife tried to express her wants and needs, he couldn’t hear her without becoming very defensive. After finding Janna's work, Keith begins to unpack what he has learned to make sense of his jumbled emotions and find the real connection he was seeking.

Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.

Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.

Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.

In this enlightening episode, 40-year-old Brandi shares her inspiring journey of self-discovery and rekindled desire. Growing up in southern Utah within the Mormon faith, Brandi's sex education was rooted in the belief of abstinence until marriage. After her first marriage ended due to years of betrayal, she ventured into the eye-opening world of online dating before meeting her current husband. 

In the beginning, their sex life was amazing, but after she became pregnant, her desire faded completely, and things became challenging. She and her husband found themselves stuck in endless arguments, and Brandi felt lost and broken, unsure of where to turn for help. 

Everything changed when she discovered Janna’s Doing It Together program. Through the program, Brandi experienced many powerful “aha” moments and, together with her husband, learned how to reignite their connection. Now, with hope restored, Brandi shares the transformative lessons they’ve learned.

Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.

Ready to learn on your own? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.

Ready to learn as a couple? Learn about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together.