The Black Mother Wound Podcast

Ep 070: Everything Can’t Be a Priority


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Sometimes, it feels like everything has to get done perfectly, all at once.  Often, we carry the heavy belief that if everything isn’t done just right, we won’t be loved or accepted. This pressure can drain us, pushing us to say yes when we want to say no, and to ignore our own needs to keep others happy. But this cycle only leads to exhaustion and emptiness.

True healing begins when you give yourself permission to slow down and accept that it’s okay not to have everything figured out. It’s about setting boundaries and choosing what truly matters, then letting go of the rest without guilt or shame.

When you start treating yourself with kindness and patience, you build a new relationship with yourself, one rooted in self-love and grace.

Remember, healing isn’t about perfection. It’s about showing up for yourself with compassion, even on imperfect days. You deserve to feel loved and accepted, not because of what you do, but because of who you are. And when you truly believe that, your whole life begins to change.

In this episode, I reflect on how my mother wound shaped my need to control everything and take on too much. Sharing insights from a recent girls trip, I talk about learning to accept my limits, set boundaries, and stop making everything a priority. Tune in to learn how embracing your limitations can create space for true healing, self-love, and healthier relationships with yourself and others.

Topics Covered:

(00:00:00) Episode Snippet

(00:00:10) Welcome to the Black Mother Wound podcast

(00:03:54) Feeling loved and expanding capacity for love

(00:05:02) Mother wounds shape loneliness and relationships

(00:07:46) Making emotional deposits into yourself

(00:10:21) Healing changes self-worth and presence

(00:13:00) Healing attracts healthier relationships

(00:14:05) Accept your limits

(00:16:26) Burnout from unrealistic priorities

(00:21:13) It’s okay to shift priorities and say no

(00:22:07) Reevaluate your timelines

(00:24:20) Set boundaries and say no

(00:26:03) Release resentment and regret

(00:27:12) Prioritize with self-compassion, not fear

(00:28:31) Everything can’t be a priority

Key Takeaways: 

"People who try to do everything and make everything a priority generally have poor boundaries."

"If you press yourself so hard, you create stress and resentment that feels normal."

DISCLAIMER: I am not a licensed psychologist, medical doctor, or health care professional and my services do not replace the care of psychologists, doctors or other healthcare professionals. All opinions expressed here are my own. If you feel you are in any danger of harming yourself please call 911. I am not providing health care, medical or nutritional therapy services, or attempting to diagnose, treat, prevent or cure any physical, mental or emotional issue, disease or condition. All opinions are my own and based on my personal lived experience.

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The Black Mother Wound PodcastBy Jennifer Arnise

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