We fall headfirst back into the realm of big claims, with the argument that there is no such thing as wild land on earth – just ask the BBC, apparently.

It’s a complex conspiracy theory (we don’t need to tell you from who) that involves undercover penguins, GPS polar bears, tigers in the Wicklow Mountains, and Jim Carrey in a rhino’s arse.

The drones are delivering dogs to Darren and Joe is now a scooter man, after a somewhat unexpectedly prompt delivery of his new wheels.

And Joe is playing hardball on bringing the Very Good Spice Bag truck to the live show.

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