The Ex-Good Girl Podcast

Episode 158 - When Speaking Up Changes Your Life with Jessica Carlson


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If you’ve been curious about what it looks like to say what you need to say in practice, today you’ll hear from someone who found her outside voice and is using it to create the life she wants. Jessica Carlson has spent years serving others—as a pastor’s wife, a mom, a teacher, and now supporting college students in getting the resources they need. Jessica and I first connected over our shared background in high-demand religion, and since we began working together, I’ve watched her life transform. She learned to speak up messily and imperfectly, and to support herself through hard conversations that once felt impossible. Jessica’s journey is a powerful example of how everything can shift when women use their voices, not just for themselves, but for the kind of change they want to see in the world. Here’s what we cover:


  • What Jessica’s life looked like when she first joined the Stop People Pleasing group
  • The power that comes from realizing you get to choose the kind of discomfort you feel in relationships
  • Why the goal isn’t always to say no, but to understand you have that option when you need it
  • How a simple step-by-step process helps you find the right words and practice speaking up
  • Jessica’s journey of running for public office and the changes she has made by working on this skill


Jessica Carlson is a university career coach and former high school teacher. She lives in the midwest with her husband of 23 years and 2 children, both in college. She has a bachelor’s in English and secondary education and a master’s in education. She was raised in a fundamentalist high-demand religious context and then married a Christian pastor through which church experiences compounded the people pleasing she learned at an early age.  At her core, she serves people but that service as a wife, mom, teacher, and community member caused her to lose herself. Jessica is a reflective thinker and someone who cares deeply about connection and meaning but has only recently realized that her voice matters and that it is powerful and she can impact systems. She is especially drawn to conversations about how we unlearn the pressure to be everything for everyone, and what it looks like to choose ourselves, sometimes for the first time.


Find Jessica here:

instagram.com/jess_c7072

tiktok.com/@queenbee7072 


Find Sara here:

sarafisk.coach

pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

instagram.com/sarafiskcoach

facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching

tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach

youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

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The Ex-Good Girl PodcastBy Sara Bybee Fisk

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