In this episode of Cults and the Culting of America, hosts Scot Loyd and Daniella Mestyanek Young engage with Tara and Floyd, who share their experiences growing up in the Institute in Basic Life Principles (IBLP) and the Advanced Training Institute (ATI). They discuss the complexities of deconstruction from fundamentalist beliefs, the emotional toll of leaving a cult, and the impact on family relationships. The conversation also touches on the importance of emotional awareness in parenting and the healing journey after leaving high-control groups. Tara and Floyd reflect on their participation in the documentary 'Shiny Happy People' and the challenges they faced in sharing their story.

Tara and Floyd:

Instagram: @advocateaverage

tiktok: @advocateaverage

Daniella's Links:

You can read all about my story in my book, Uncultured-- buy signed copies here. https://bit.ly/SignedUncultured For more info on me: Patreon: https://bit.ly/YTPLanding Cult book Clubs (Advanced AND Memoirs) Annual Membership: https://bit.ly/YTPLanding Get an autographed copy of my book, Uncultured: https://bit.ly/SignedUncultured Get my book, Uncultured, from Bookshop.org: https://bit.ly/4g1Ufw8 Daniella’s Tiktok: https://bit.ly/3V6GK6k / KnittingCultLady Instagram:  https://bit.ly/4ePAOFK / daniellamyoung_  Unamerican video book (on Patreon): https://bit.ly/YTVideoBook Secret Practice video book (on Patreon): https://bit.ly/3ZswGY8

Other Podcasts

Daniella's other podcast: Hey White Women

Takeaways

• Deconstruction is a personal journey that varies for each individual.
• Cults often use contracts and strict rules to control members' lives.
• The emotional cost of leaving a cult can be profound, affecting family relationships.
• Parenting styles can be influenced by past experiences in cults.
• Finding peace and healing is possible after leaving a high-control group.
• The process of deconstruction can lead to a deeper understanding of oneself.
• Cults often exploit labor and manipulate finances for their benefit.
• Sharing one's story can be a powerful tool for healing and connection.
• The importance of emotional awareness in parenting cannot be overstated.
• Cults can be seen as criminal enterprises that exploit their members. 

Chapters

00:00 Introduction to the Journey of Deconstruction 01:33 Understanding IBLP and ATI 05:45 The Cult Debate: Is IBLP a Cult? 12:11 Navigating Different Deconstruction Timelines 18:27 The Impact of Parenting on Deconstruction 23:46 Sobriety and the Numbing Process 28:31 Emotional Suppression in Cults 31:11 The Birth of a Musical Concept 32:14 Living with the Pain of Loss 34:50 Navigating Family Relationships Post-Cult 37:18 The Complexity of Conditional Love 40:13 The Struggle of Acceptance and Identity 43:12 The Irony of Family Dynamics 46:22 Addiction to Certainty and Superiority 49:15 Finding Peace in Acceptance 53:05 The Journey of Healing and Advocacy

Produced by Haley Phillips