This is a rebroadcast of Episode 234.

Synopsis

A survey of 12,000 businesspeople that Dr. Misner conducted for his upcoming book, Business Networking and Sex (Not What You Think), showed that people who focused first on relationship and then on business scored much higher in success than those who focused first on business and then on the relationship.

Also according to this survey, men are much more transactional than women are, which is why women are usually more successful at networking. This is part of why Dr. Misner created the GAINS Exchange: because he’s not good at being relational. And the reason Dr. Misner starts each episode by saying where he is that week is to show members that he takes meeting BNI members in different chapters seriously.

Networking expert Susan RoAne reads the sports page every day in order to be able to start conversations with men—even though she hates sports. How many men read Cosmopolitan or Home and Garden in order to be able to talk to women? But if you make an effort to be more relational, it will pay off in your networking.

Brought to you by Networking Now.

Complete Transcript of BNI Podcast Episode 234 –

Priscilla:

Hello everyone and welcome back to The Official BNI Podcast brought to you by NetworkingNow.com, which is the leading site on the net for networking downloadables. I am Priscilla Rice, and I am coming to you from Live Oak Recording Studio in Berkeley, CA. I am joined on the phone today by the Founder and Chairman of BNI, Dr. Ivan Misner. Hello Ivan, how are you and where are you?

Ivan:

Thanks, Priscilla. I am doing great and I am going to tell you where I am at the end of my podcast today because I want to talk a little bit about why I say where I am and why I think it’s important. I am going to connect that, believe it or not, to this topic. Transactional vs. relational.

I recently got a message on this podcast from Michael. I won’t give his last name. You are going to love this one, Priscilla. This is an interesting one. He says, “You people are real blowhards. I don’t need to hear you people bloviate about your navel.” By the way, very good vocabulary, Michael. I am very impressed with your vocabulary. “ I don’t need to hear you bloviate. I know you think you’re important. I don’t give a care where you are, what you are doing or anything else about your life. All I need to know is the information, not how important you find yourself.” How do you feel about that, Priscilla?

Priscilla:

Oh wow.

Ivan:

If it’s any consolation, he is talking mostly about me.

Priscilla:

No, I think he is talking about us and our little banter back and forth.

Ivan:

That’s possibly true. First, I want to talk about why and then I want to come back to another email I got, interestingly enough, on the same day. That will take us to our topic of transactional versus relational. So why do I say where I am in the world? Let me tell you why. It’s done on purpose. I, for a long time, would have members send me emails and they would be really upset and talking about where are you and how come I haven’t met you? Where are you? Are you in your ivory tower in BNI? Are you on the beach drinking margaritas? No! I travel a lot. I think it’s really important to meet directors and meet members. It’s part of the job I love. I love traveling around and telling people how they can increase their business.

So the reason I start off every podcast with where I am is to give people a sense of just how much I travel to regions and care about and want to connect with members around the world. Listen,