Feel Good Alcohol-Free with Lindsay Hennekey

What happens when you go 30, 60, or 90 days—or even several months—without drinking, and then find yourself drinking again?

You might think, I thought I was past this. Did all that work mean nothing? Am I starting over?

In this episode, Lindsay Hennekey talks about what can happen when you drink again after a long alcohol-free stretch—and why it doesn't mean you've failed or erased your progress.

Instead, the experience can give you valuable information about the situations, emotions, and associations with alcohol that you haven't practiced navigating yet.

In this episode, you'll hear about:

• Why drinking again doesn't erase your alcohol-free progress
• Why long stretches without alcohol don't automatically erase old associations
• How alcohol can become connected to both coping and celebration
• Why you may discover new drinking triggers months into your journey
• What happens when you stop preparing because being alcohol-free starts to feel easy
• Why shame isn't analysis—and what to ask yourself instead
• How to identify the “missed step” before drinking
• Why you're not starting over after drinking again
• The difference between counting alcohol-free days and collecting alcohol-free experiences
• How Lindsay's Identity → Practice → Trust method works
• Why self-trust comes from evidence, not simply telling yourself to trust yourself
• How exhaustion, resentment, and overwhelm can reveal what alcohol has been doing for you
• How to turn a drinking episode into information you can use moving forward

A powerful reminder from this episode

You are not starting over.

If you went four months without drinking and then drank on Saturday, you didn't erase those four months. You still have all of the mornings, dinners, conversations, social situations, and experiences you navigated without alcohol.

You simply discovered another part of your life that needs practice.

Instead of asking, “What's wrong with me?”, ask:

What happened? What did I expect alcohol to give me? What did I learn? What do I want to practice next?

Identity → Practice → Trust

Lindsay's approach isn't about simply reaching 30 or 90 days.

It's about becoming the woman who can cope, celebrate, relax, connect, and belong without needing alcohol.

Identity gives you the direction. Practice gives you the evidence. Trust is what you build along the way.

If you've been wondering, “I went months without drinking, so why did I drink again?”, maybe the answer isn't that none of it worked.

Maybe there was simply another situation you hadn't learned how to navigate yet.

Now you know.

What do you want to practice next?

If you're ready for support making alcohol-free living feel like your actual life, you'll find information about working with Lindsay in the show notes.

And if this episode resonates with you, share it with a woman who needs to hear: you didn't lose your progress.

Support the show

Here's how you can stay connected: 

• 🗓️ Schedule a 30-minute Discovery Call
• 👩‍💻 Sign-up for Feel Good AF Coaching
• 📱Follow along on Instagram
• 📰 Subscribe to the Feel Good AF newsletter

And remember, Lindsay is a sober coach, not a health professional. If you are chemically dependent on alcohol (or think you might be), consult your doctor on the steps you need to take to safely detox. 

Intro/Outro Music Credit: Cozy Lofi Beat - Split memmories by Idoberg

Sober curious women. Quit drinking without AA, How to quit drinking for High Achieving women. 

What happens to your relationships when alcohol is no longer part of the equation?

In this episode, Lindsay sits down with Joel Monteleone, relationship strategist, dating coach, creator of Hot Takes Hot Dates, and host of the Hotter Together podcast. Joel is also nearly four years alcohol-free, giving him a unique perspective on how sobriety can change not only your relationship with yourself, but also how you date, communicate, connect, and show up in partnership.

Together, Lindsay and Joel explore what happens when you stop using alcohol as a way to connect, relax, avoid difficult conversations, or navigate vulnerability.

They also talk about the surprising amount of time and energy that can become available when drinking is no longer taking up so much space—and how that newfound capacity can completely change the way you approach your life and relationships.

In this episode, you'll hear about:

• How removing alcohol can create more energy, clarity, capacity, and connection
• Why sobriety can open your eyes to entirely new communities and ways of spending your time
• The connection between alcohol and relationship rituals, including date nights, vacations, celebrations, and weekends
• How alcohol can make vulnerability feel easier while simultaneously preventing deeper, more authentic communication
• What can happen in a relationship when you stop using alcohol to avoid difficult conversations
• Why becoming comfortable with discomfort is essential for both sobriety and healthy relationships
• How high-achieving women can struggle with control, trust, and vulnerability in relationships
• The difference between being committed to a relationship and attached to a specific outcome
• Why your partner can't support you with your drinking if they don't actually understand what's happening for you
• How to communicate the seriousness of wanting to change your relationship with alcohol
• Why asking for support gives your partner an opportunity to love you
• What happens when one person in a relationship stops drinking while their partner continues to drink
• How worst-case-scenario thinking can affect both dating and sobriety
• Why authenticity can help you eliminate relationships that aren't right for you—and make space for the ones that are
• How the beliefs you hold about dating can influence what you notice and pursue
• Why getting clear on what you do want, rather than only what you don't want, matters so much
• Joel's advice for women who believe there are “no good men” or that dating is impossible where they live

A powerful reminder from this conversation

One of the biggest themes throughout the episode is trust.

Trusting yourself.
Trusting your partner. If your partner doesn't understand how much you're struggling with alcohol, they may respond to the surface-level problem rather than the real one. When you're finally honest about what's actually happening—how often you're thinking about drinking, how much you're relying on it, and.
Trusting the process.
And being willing to tolerate the discomfort that comes with finding out what is actually true.

As Joel explains, when you ask someone for support, you give them an opportunity to love you.

That idea applies far beyond sobriety. If your partner doesn't understand how much you're struggling with alcohol, they may respond to the surface-level problem rather than the real one. When you're finally honest about what's actually happening—how often you're thinking about drinking, how much you're relying on it, and why you need to change—you give them the information they need to truly support you.

Meet Joel

Joel Monteleone is a relationship strategist and dating coach based in Austin, Texas. He primarily works with high-achieving women who want to create meaningful romantic relationships without sacrificing who they are.

He's also the host of Hotter Together, a podcast featuring couples who explore how their relationships have contributed to their success in business and life, and the creator of Hot Takes Hot Dates, live dating events in Austin.

You can find Joel on Instagram at @joel_monteleone.

Support the show

Here's how you can stay connected: 

• 🗓️ Schedule a 30-minute Discovery Call
• 👩‍💻 Sign-up for Feel Good AF Coaching
• 📱Follow along on Instagram
• 📰 Subscribe to the Feel Good AF newsletter

And remember, Lindsay is a sober coach, not a health professional. If you are chemically dependent on alcohol (or think you might be), consult your doctor on the steps you need to take to safely detox. 

Intro/Outro Music Credit: Cozy Lofi Beat - Split memmories by Idoberg

Sober curious women. Quit drinking without AA, How to quit drinking for High Achieving women. 

If you’re trying to change your relationship with alcohol while your husband still drinks, you may wonder if quitting would be easier if he stopped too.

In this episode of Feel Good Alcohol-Free, Lindsay Hennekey talks about one of the most common challenges women face when they decide to stop drinking: learning how to make an alcohol-free choice when their partner is making a different one.

When alcohol has been part of your relationship for years, it can feel like you're giving up more than a drink. Maybe Friday nights have always meant opening a bottle of wine together. Maybe you order cocktails on date nights, drink on vacation, or sit on the porch with a glass in hand. These rituals can become deeply connected to your relationship and your idea of what it means to relax, connect, and have fun.

Lindsay explains why your husband's drinking can feel difficult—and why getting specific about what is actually hard is so important.

Is it having alcohol in the house? Watching him pour a drink after a long day? Being offered a drink? Feeling left out? Missing a ritual you used to share? Or does seeing him drink make you question your own decision?

Lindsay also explores the thought, “Why does he get to drink?” and how comparing your relationship with alcohol to someone else's can keep you focused on their experience instead of your own.

The goal isn't to make quitting unnecessarily difficult or to ignore your needs. You're allowed to ask your partner for support and create boundaries that make early sobriety easier. But you also don't have to wait for your husband to change before you can change.

In this episode, you'll learn:

• Why a partner's drinking can make changing your relationship with alcohol feel harder
• How shared drinking rituals can affect your relationship
• Why watching someone else drink can trigger your own desire to drink
• How to identify the specific situations that are difficult for you
• Why comparing your drinking to your husband's isn't helpful
• How to communicate your needs without requiring your partner to quit
• Ways to create new rituals for date nights, weekends, and vacations
• How practicing uncomfortable situations can build self-trust
• Why you don't need perfect conditions to follow through on your decision
• How Lindsay's Identity, Practice, Trust approach applies to navigating alcohol when your partner still drinks

The goal isn't to make your husband's drinking irrelevant. Your relationships, routines, and environment matter. The goal is to understand what you need so you can make decisions based on your own experience rather than waiting for everyone around you to make the same choice.

Your husband can make his decision about alcohol. And you can make yours.

If you're tired of spending so much time thinking about alcohol and want support changing your relationship with it, learn more about working with Lindsay through the information in the show notes.

And if this episode resonates with you, share it with a woman who has ever thought, “It would be so much easier if my husband would just quit too.”

Support the show

Here's how you can stay connected: 

• 🗓️ Schedule a 30-minute Discovery Call
• 👩‍💻 Sign-up for Feel Good AF Coaching
• 📱Follow along on Instagram
• 📰 Subscribe to the Feel Good AF newsletter

And remember, Lindsay is a sober coach, not a health professional. If you are chemically dependent on alcohol (or think you might be), consult your doctor on the steps you need to take to safely detox. 

Intro/Outro Music Credit: Cozy Lofi Beat - Split memmories by Idoberg

Sober curious women. Quit drinking without AA, How to quit drinking for High Achieving women. 

🎁 Get Lindsay's Free Three Wins in 48 Hours Resource

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You’ve told your husband you’re trying to quit drinking. So why does he still offer you wine on Friday night?

He may genuinely think he’s helping.

The problem is that he may not understand what you’re actually trying to change.

There’s a big difference between saying, “I’m not drinking this week,” and explaining, “I’m spending way more time thinking about alcohol than you realize, and I’m trying to change my relationship with it.”

In this episode, Lindsay talks about what happens when your partner sees the drinking but doesn’t see the mental negotiation happening behind it.

In This Episode, Lindsay Covers:

• Why your husband may think offering you “just one” is supportive
• The beliefs about alcohol that can unintentionally reinforce drinking
• What your partner may not see about your daily mental battle with alcohol
• How Lindsay's own marriage changed when she became more vulnerable
• How to communicate what support actually looks like
• Why your partner isn't responsible for whether you drink
• How practicing new behaviors builds self-trust
• Why you don't need a rock bottom to decide you want something different

The Conversation to Have

Instead of simply saying, “I'm not drinking,” try explaining what’s actually happening:

“I need you to understand why this is important to me. I keep deciding I don't want to drink, and then I change my mind later. I'm spending much more time thinking about alcohol than you probably realize.”

Then tell your partner what would actually help.

Maybe that means not offering you wine, not telling you that you've earned a drink, or simply asking what you need when you're struggling.

Your partner can't support what they don't understand.

Building Self-Trust

Changing your relationship with alcohol isn't just about removing wine from your evening. It's about practicing new ways to cope, relax, celebrate, socialize, and respond to stress.

Every time you make a decision you actually want to make and follow through, you create evidence that you can trust yourself.

You don't have to solve everything today.

Start with one decision.

I said I was going to do this — and I did it.

💬 Ready for More Support?

Learn more about working with Lindsay through coaching

If this episode made you think, “Oh my God, my husband does this,” send it to a woman who needs to hear it.

You have better things to think about than drinking, my friend.

Support the show

Here's how you can stay connected: 

• 🗓️ Schedule a 30-minute Discovery Call
• 👩‍💻 Sign-up for Feel Good AF Coaching
• 📱Follow along on Instagram
• 📰 Subscribe to the Feel Good AF newsletter

And remember, Lindsay is a sober coach, not a health professional. If you are chemically dependent on alcohol (or think you might be), consult your doctor on the steps you need to take to safely detox. 

Intro/Outro Music Credit: Cozy Lofi Beat - Split memmories by Idoberg

Sober curious women. Quit drinking without AA, How to quit drinking for High Achieving women. 

🎟️ Reserve your free seat for Lindsay's How to Become the Woman Who Doesn't Want Alcohol

Save your seat for “How to Become the Woman Who Doesn't Want Alcohol”

Why You Want a Drink at 5 PM—Even When You Promised Yourself You Wouldn’t
You wake up at 8 AM completely certain: “I’m not drinking tonight.”

You mean it. And then somehow, by 5 PM, one glass of wine sounds like the perfect idea.

If you’ve ever wondered why your morning decision seems to disappear by the end of the workday, this episode is for you.

In the Season 4 finale of Feel Good Alcohol Free, Lindsay Hennekey explores why knowing what you want to do about drinking isn't always the same as trusting yourself to follow through—and why the solution isn't simply trying harder.

In This Episode
Your 8 AM brain and your 5 PM brain are asking different questions.

In the morning: “What do I want to do about my relationship with alcohol?”
At 5 PM: “What would make me feel better right now?”

If alcohol has been your go-to answer for years, your brain has learned that pattern.

Instead of only asking “Why do I want a drink?”, Lindsay encourages you to ask:

“What do I want the drink to do for me?”

Maybe you're looking for:

Relief after a stressful day

• A reward
• A transition out of work
• A way to stop thinking
• A mood change
• Something to look forward to
• Time when nobody needs anything from you

Once you understand the job alcohol has been doing, you can begin practicing another response.

What You'll Learn

• Why your morning decision may not carry you through the evening
• Why 3–5 PM can be the most important part of your day to study
• How alcohol becomes connected to stress, relaxation, celebration, and routines
• How to interrupt your usual drinking pattern before the urge gets loud
• Why self-trust comes from practice
• How repeated experiences can change your relationship with alcohol
• How identity, practice, and trust work together

A Client Story
Lindsay shares the story of a coaching client whose drinking thoughts appeared almost every day around 3 PM and 5 PM.

For her, wine represented more than a drink. It meant:
“I’m done. I’m home. I get to go offline.”

Together, they worked on creating a new transition into the evening—changing her environment, getting outside, taking breaks, and creating new alcohol-free rituals with her family.

Over time, she began collecting evidence that she could:

• Come home without drinking
• Cook and relax without wine
• Handle stressful days without drinking
• Navigate social situations without automatically reaching for alcohol
• She didn't find one magical trick. She practiced.
• And that practice became self-trust.

Your 5 PM Practice
If this sounds familiar, don't just focus on your morning decision. Study your afternoon.

Ask yourself:

• When does the negotiation actually begin?
• What happens right before it? Are you hungry, tired, overstimulated, bored, lonely, or irritated?

Then ask:

• What is alcohol promising me right now?

And finally:

• What could I practice instead—just tonight?

Maybe it's eating something, going outside, changing your clothes, taking a shower, calling someone, making an alcohol-free drink, or simply taking 20 minutes for yourself.

The specific strategy matters less than the practice.

Every time you follow through, you're collecting evidence that you can trust yourself.

The Takeaway
You don't have to wait until you magically stop wanting relief.

You're going to have stressful days. You're going to get tired. You're going to want to check out.

The work is learning to respond differently when those moments arrive.

Self-trust isn't something you need before you begin. It's something you build—one practice, one decision, and one piece of evidence at a time.

You have better things to think about than drinking.

Support the show

Here's how you can stay connected: 

• 🗓️ Schedule a 30-minute Discovery Call
• 👩‍💻 Sign-up for Feel Good AF Coaching
• 📱Follow along on Instagram
• 📰 Subscribe to the Feel Good AF newsletter

And remember, Lindsay is a sober coach, not a health professional. If you are chemically dependent on alcohol (or think you might be), consult your doctor on the steps you need to take to safely detox. 

Intro/Outro Music Credit: Cozy Lofi Beat - Split memmories by Idoberg

Sober curious women. Quit drinking without AA, How to quit drinking for High Achieving women. 

What if the tool you need to manage stress, uncomfortable emotions, and the urge to reach for a drink has been with you all along?

In this episode, Lindsay sits down with Megan Ashton, founder of Unity Breathwork, to explore the power of breathwork as a tool for nervous system regulation, emotional processing, and healthier coping.

Megan shares her own powerful healing journey through bulimia, alcohol dependence, and years of using travel and other distractions to avoid uncomfortable emotions. After discovering conscious connected breathwork, she experienced a profound emotional release and eventually found that her reliance on binge drinking and binge eating began to fall away.

Together, Lindsay and Megan talk about why we often turn to alcohol, food, shopping, scrolling, or other quick dopamine hits when we're overwhelmed, and how building a stronger relationship with our nervous system can create more space between a difficult emotion and an automatic reaction.

In this episode, you'll learn:

• Why stress and unprocessed emotions can make us more likely to reach for alcohol or other coping mechanisms.
• The difference between everyday regulating breathwork and conscious connected breathwork.
• How breath awareness throughout the day can help interrupt the cycle of overwhelm.
• Why practicing breathwork regularly may make it easier to use when you're actually stressed.
• A simple five-count coherence breathing exercise you can try in just a few minutes.
• How conscious connected breathwork is used to explore deeper emotional experiences.
• Why Megan believes we don't need to keep looking outside ourselves for every answer—we already have access to our breath.
• How creating space to feel emotions can change the way we respond to life's inevitable curveballs.
• Why developing healthy coping tools is a practice rather than a one-time fix.

Try a Free Conscious Connected Breathwork Journey

Want to experience breathwork for yourself?

Megan offers a Free Conscious Connected Breathwork Journey online. This is a great opportunity to experience the practice and explore what breathwork may offer you.

→ Free Conscious Connected Breathwork Journey

A simple breathing practice from this episode

Megan guides Lindsay and listeners through coherence breathing:

Inhale through your nose for 5 counts.
Exhale through your nose for 5 counts.
Repeat for several minutes.

The goal is to slow the breath, eliminate the pause between the inhale and exhale, and create a calming rhythm. Start gently and stop if you feel uncomfortable, dizzy, or unwell.

For deeper or activating breathwork practices, Megan emphasizes the importance of working with an appropriately trained facilitator and considering individual safety and contraindications.

About Megan Ashton

Megan Ashton is the founder of Unity Breathwork and a breathwork educator and trainer. Her personal healing journey led her to conscious connected breathwork, and she now focuses on trauma-informed practice, facilitator competency, and education around breathwork and altered states of consciousness.

She leads breathwork retreats in Mexico and directs Unity Breathwork's professional training program.

Connect with Megan

Learn more about Megan’s work, upcoming breathwork sessions, retreats, training, and resources at unitybreathwork.com.

You can also follow Megan and Unity Breathwork on Instagram at @unitybreathwork.

A note for listeners

Breathwork can affect people differently, and some forms of breathwork can be physically and emotionally intense. The breathing exercise discussed in this episode is presented as a simple relaxation practice, not as a substitute for medical or mental-health care. If you have a medical or mental-health condition, are pregnant, or have concerns about whether breathwork is appropriate for you, consult an appropriately qualified healthcare professional before participating in intensive breathwork.

If you're working on changing your relationship with alcohol, remember that you don't have to rely on willpower alone. Building a toolkit of healthy ways to respond to stress, emotions, and cravings can be an important part of the process.

Support the show

Here's how you can stay connected: 

• 🗓️ Schedule a 30-minute Discovery Call
• 👩‍💻 Sign-up for Feel Good AF Coaching
• 📱Follow along on Instagram
• 📰 Subscribe to the Feel Good AF newsletter

And remember, Lindsay is a sober coach, not a health professional. If you are chemically dependent on alcohol (or think you might be), consult your doctor on the steps you need to take to safely detox. 

Intro/Outro Music Credit: Cozy Lofi Beat - Split memmories by Idoberg

Sober curious women. Quit drinking without AA, How to quit drinking for High Achieving women. 

Have you ever wondered whether alcohol is making your perimenopause symptoms worse—or if what you're experiencing is simply part of getting older?

In this episode, Lindsay Hennekey gets honest about the confusing overlap between alcohol and perimenopause, from 3 a.m. wakeups and night sweats to anxiety, irritability, low energy, brain fog, and the feeling that wine just doesn't affect you the way it used to.

Lindsay explores why alcohol deserves to be part of the conversation when you're trying to understand what's happening in your body. She also talks about the temptation to change everything—your workouts, supplements, diet, sleep routine, skincare, and hormone strategy—while giving alcohol a free pass.

But what if removing alcohol could give you some of the information you've been looking for?

In this episode:

• Why alcohol deserves a place in the perimenopause conversation
• How alcohol can affect your sleep and contribute to those 3 a.m. wakeups
• Why wine may suddenly affect you differently than it did in your 20s and 30s
• The difference between getting temporary relief from alcohol and getting the results you actually want
• How alcohol can contribute to the cycle of exhaustion, anxiety, and reaching for another drink
• Why high-achieving women are often willing to change everything except their drinking
• The connection between alcohol, calories, and weight management during perimenopause
• Why taking a meaningful break from alcohol can be a powerful experiment
• What you can learn by paying attention to your sleep, energy, anxiety, mood, and other symptoms without alcohol
• Why stopping drinking doesn't magically cure perimenopause—and why that's not the point
• What to do when you already know you'd feel better without alcohol but still want the drink at 5:30 p.m.
• Why knowing alcohol isn't helping isn't always enough to change your behavior
• The importance of having new ways to cope with stress, discomfort, boredom, celebration, and connection
• How identity, practice, and self-trust help you build an alcohol-free life
• Why every alcohol-free decision creates evidence that you can trust yourself

If you're in perimenopause and feel like your body suddenly changed all the rules, this conversation is for you.

You don't have to blame alcohol for every symptom. And you don't have to assume every symptom is caused by perimenopause, either.

Instead, get curious.

Remove one variable. Pay attention to what changes—and just as importantly, what doesn't.

And if you already know alcohol isn't helping but you're still struggling to stop going back to it, the work may not be about learning more about alcohol. It may be about learning what to do at 5:30 p.m., on the stressful Wednesday, after a terrible night's sleep, at dinner with friends, or when you simply want to escape how you're feeling.

You don't have to decide today that you'll never drink again.

You can start by practicing becoming the woman you want to be—and building the evidence that you can trust yourself.

If you found this episode was helpful, here is another you might enjoy:

Episode 64: Alcohol, Perimenopause, and Feeling Good Again

Join Lindsay for Feel Good AF Friday:
Lindsay is hosting a free live workshop on September 25 at 12 p.m. Eastern focused on why you can know exactly what you want to do about your drinking and still struggle to trust yourself to follow through. Register using the link in the show notes.

And remember: You have better things to think about than drinking.

Support the show

Here's how you can stay connected: 

• 🗓️ Schedule a 30-minute Discovery Call
• 👩‍💻 Sign-up for Feel Good AF Coaching
• 📱Follow along on Instagram
• 📰 Subscribe to the Feel Good AF newsletter

And remember, Lindsay is a sober coach, not a health professional. If you are chemically dependent on alcohol (or think you might be), consult your doctor on the steps you need to take to safely detox. 

Intro/Outro Music Credit: Cozy Lofi Beat - Split memmories by Idoberg

Sober curious women. Quit drinking without AA, How to quit drinking for High Achieving women. 

Have you ever completed 30 days without alcohol, felt amazing, and then found yourself right back in the same drinking pattern a few weeks later?

In this episode, Lindsay breaks down why taking a 30-day break from alcohol can be incredibly valuable but why completing Sober September, Dry January, or another alcohol-free challenge doesn't necessarily mean you've changed your relationship with alcohol.

After years of using 30-day breaks as proof that she could control her drinking, Lindsay knows firsthand what it feels like to make it through the month only to return to the same daily negotiation: Am I drinking tonight? How much? When can I start? Maybe I'll just wait until Monday.

In this episode, she explores what happens when you stop focusing only on the number of alcohol-free days and start looking at the patterns, situations, relationships, and emotions that make drinking feel like the answer.

In this episode:

• Why 30 alcohol-free days and lasting change aren't necessarily the same thing
• How alcohol can become part of your workday transitions, celebrations, relationships, and coping strategies
• Why generic advice like "practice self-care" isn't always enough
• How to identify what happens right before the thought of drinking begins
• Why your hardest drinking moments can reveal exactly where your plan needs work
• How to prepare for the end of the workday, Friday nights, social events, and other high-risk situations
• What to say when friends, coworkers, or your partner ask about your decision not to drink
• How to ask your partner for the kind of support you actually need
• Why drinking during an alcohol-free challenge doesn't mean you've failed
• How to use difficult moments as information instead of turning them into shame
• The difference between enduring the absence of alcohol and learning how to live without making alcohol the answer
• Why self-trust comes from collecting evidence that you can rely on yourself
• Lindsay's Identity, Practice, and Trust approach to lasting change
• When another 30-day challenge may not be what you actually need

If you've done Sober September, Dry January, or multiple alcohol-free challenges and keep finding yourself back in the same drinking loop, this episode is for you.

You don't need another perfect streak. You may need to understand what happens in the moments when your old plan falls apart—and build a new plan around your actual life.

And if this is your first alcohol-free break, let September give you information. Pay attention to when you want to drink, what happens beforehand, what you're expecting alcohol to do for you, and what becomes easier or harder without it.

You don't need to wait for a new month, a Monday, or perfect conditions to make a change.

The goal isn't simply to prove that you can go 30 days without drinking.

It's to start building a life where you can trust yourself around alcohol.

Support the show

Here's how you can stay connected: 

• 🗓️ Schedule a 30-minute Discovery Call
• 👩‍💻 Sign-up for Feel Good AF Coaching
• 📱Follow along on Instagram
• 📰 Subscribe to the Feel Good AF newsletter

And remember, Lindsay is a sober coach, not a health professional. If you are chemically dependent on alcohol (or think you might be), consult your doctor on the steps you need to take to safely detox. 

Intro/Outro Music Credit: Cozy Lofi Beat - Split memmories by Idoberg

Sober curious women. Quit drinking without AA, How to quit drinking for High Achieving women. 

Have you ever wondered if you can change your relationship with alcohol without having to identify as an “alcoholic,” follow a specific recovery program, or hit rock bottom first?

In this episode, Lindsay sits down with Ryan Kennedy, host of Rock Bottom With Ryan, to talk honestly about addiction, recovery, vulnerability, AA, and finding your own path to sobriety.

After years of heavy drinking, repeated attempts to control his alcohol use, hospitalizations, injuries, seizures, and relapse, Ryan finally reached a point where he knew he needed help. Now, nearly two years sober, he’s using his experience to help others through honest conversations about recovery, mental health, trauma, and second chances.

Ryan and Lindsay also discuss his unique approach to AA — embracing the community and connection while taking what resonates and leaving what doesn’t.

In this episode:

•  Ryan’s journey through addiction, relapse, and recovery 
•  Why you don’t have to hit rock bottom to change your drinking 
•  How comparing your drinking to others can keep you stuck 
•  Finding your own approach to AA and recovery 
•  The power of community, friendship, and connection 
•  Why vulnerability can be a turning point in recovery 
•  How shame and emotional avoidance can fuel drinking 
•  Why you don’t need a label to change your relationship with alcohol 
•  The “normal drinker” mindset and why it can keep you stuck 
•  How sobriety can unlock your potential 
•  Ryan’s plans to become a sober coach 

If you've been questioning your drinking but don't relate to traditional recovery language, this conversation is for you. You don't have to call yourself an alcoholic, hit rock bottom, or follow someone else's path.

Sometimes the first step is simply being honest about what alcohol is actually adding to or taking away from your life.

Take what resonates, leave what doesn’t, and remember that you get to build a path that works for you.

About Ryan Kennedy

Ryan Kennedy is the creator and host of the Rock Bottom with Ryan podcast. After overcoming years of addiction, Ryan now shares honest conversations about recovery, mental health, and second chances.

As he prepares to become a sober coach, he’s also building a business dedicated to promoting individuals, organizations, and businesses making a positive impact in the recovery and mental health community.

Ryan is a passionate advocate for people recovering from alcohol and drug addiction, while also raising awareness about trauma, abuse, grief, and the challenges that can contribute to addiction and mental health struggles. Through his work, he’s helping break the stigma and show that healing, hope, and long-term recovery are possible.

Connect with Ryan

Instagram: @rockbottomwithryan

Podcast: Rock Bottom with Ryan on Spotify

YouTube: Rock Bottom With Ryan 

TikTok: Rock Bottom With Ryan 

Email: [email protected]

Support the show

Here's how you can stay connected: 

• 🗓️ Schedule a 30-minute Discovery Call
• 👩‍💻 Sign-up for Feel Good AF Coaching
• 📱Follow along on Instagram
• 📰 Subscribe to the Feel Good AF newsletter

And remember, Lindsay is a sober coach, not a health professional. If you are chemically dependent on alcohol (or think you might be), consult your doctor on the steps you need to take to safely detox. 

Intro/Outro Music Credit: Cozy Lofi Beat - Split memmories by Idoberg

Sober curious women. Quit drinking without AA, How to quit drinking for High Achieving women. 

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Are you tired of making rules around drinking, taking breaks, starting over on Mondays, and still finding yourself back in the same cycle?

In this episode of the Feel Good Alcohol-Free Podcast, Lindsay reflects on the many strategies she used to try to control her drinking before realizing that moderation was actually keeping her stuck. From endless drinking rules and fresh starts to quit-lit books, sober retreats, and 30-day breaks, she shares what she learned from each attempt and why information alone wasn't enough to create lasting change.

Lindsay explains why moderation can keep alcohol at the center of your life, how the constant mental negotiation becomes exhausting, and why you don't have to wait until your drinking is "bad enough" to decide that it's no longer working for you.

You'll discover:

• Why constantly creating new drinking rules can keep you trapped in the moderation cycle
• How "I'll start again Monday" can turn one drinking decision into days of abandoning your goals
• Why consuming more information about alcohol isn't always the same as taking action
• The difference between knowing what to do and actually practicing new behaviors in real life
• How 30-day breaks like Sober September or Dry January can provide valuable information without becoming another way to earn permission to drink
• Why your intention for an alcohol-free break matters more than simply making it through the month
• How to communicate your decision not to drink without overexplaining or making excuses
• Why you don't need to prove that your drinking is "bad enough" to make a change
• The question Lindsay believes is more useful than comparing your drinking to someone else's
• How alcohol can become the automatic answer to stress, boredom, celebration, connection, and the end of a difficult workday
• Why treating a slip as information rather than failure can help you keep moving forward
• How identity, practice, and self-trust work together to create lasting change
• Why self-trust is built through the evidence you collect every time you follow through on a decision
• Practical ways to create three alcohol-free wins in the next 48 hours
• Why eating before your usual drinking window can make a bigger difference than you might expect
• How to identify the situations where you're most likely to negotiate with yourself about drinking
• Why you are allowed to change your relationship with alcohol simply because your current experience is no longer acceptable to you

If you've spent years trying to moderate, making promises to yourself, taking breaks, reading the books, or waiting for the perfect Monday to begin again, this episode is a reminder that none of those attempts were wasted. They gave you information.

The goal isn't to find a better rule that allows you to keep drinking without the consequences. It's to discover what your life can look and feel like when alcohol no longer needs to be the answer and to build the skills and self-trust that make that life possible.

LISTEN NEXT:

If this episode resonated, listen to:

Episode 6: Why Drinking in Moderation Doesn't Work: The Science of "Just One Glass"

Episode 29: The Moderation Myth: "Just One Glass"

Episode 56: What Your "Just One Glass" Mindset Actually Leads To

Support the show

Here's how you can stay connected: 

• 🗓️ Schedule a 30-minute Discovery Call
• 👩‍💻 Sign-up for Feel Good AF Coaching
• 📱Follow along on Instagram
• 📰 Subscribe to the Feel Good AF newsletter

And remember, Lindsay is a sober coach, not a health professional. If you are chemically dependent on alcohol (or think you might be), consult your doctor on the steps you need to take to safely detox. 

Intro/Outro Music Credit: Cozy Lofi Beat - Split memmories by Idoberg

Sober curious women. Quit drinking without AA, How to quit drinking for High Achieving women.