Freedom from Attachment

Kindness and expectations—well there’s an oxymoron! How can you be authentically kind while having certain expectations? If I’m acting in a certain way so someone gives me what I want (some call it being “nice”), that’s built on expectations. Wanting something in return for your kindness does not stem from a place of generosity.

Kindness comes from a compassionate and loving heart; an outpouring of what you feel inside. If you have attachment issues, this can be a thorn in your side. You may find you have resistance toward being kind because you feel owed by someone, or maybe you feel empty and need them to fill you up. That powerlessness makes finding kindness inside you nearly impossible because you’re so focused on filling the empty space. Grasping for control takes precedence, causing you to focus on what’s missing instead of being grateful for what you have.

It’s a bit of a loop because practicing genuine kindness can help us become less attached. It can guide us beyond our self-made walls rather than hiding behind them. Join me to learn how ditching expectations can clear a path for genuine kindness and compassion to flow. Not only will those around you appreciate it, you’ll be a happier human.

Kindness and expectations—well there’s an oxymoron! How can you be authentically kind while having certain expectations? If I’m acting in a certain way so someone gives me what I want (some call it being “nice”), that’s built on expectations. Wanting something in return for your kindness does not stem from a place of generosity.

Kindness comes from a compassionate and loving heart; an outpouring of what you feel inside. If you have attachment issues, this can be a thorn in your side. You may find you have resistance toward being kind because you feel owed by someone, or maybe you feel empty and need them to fill you up. That powerlessness makes finding kindness inside you nearly impossible because you’re so focused on filling the empty space. Grasping for control takes precedence, causing you to focus on what’s missing instead of being grateful for what you have.

It’s a bit of a loop because practicing genuine kindness can help us become less attached. It can guide us beyond our self-made walls rather than hiding behind them. Join me to learn how ditching expectations can clear a path for genuine kindness and compassion to flow. Not only will those around you appreciate it, you’ll be a happier human.

Kindness and expectations—well there’s an oxymoron! How can you be authentically kind while having certain expectations? If I’m acting in a certain way so someone gives me what I want (some call it being “nice”), that’s built on expectations. Wanting something in return for your kindness does not stem from a place of generosity.

Kindness comes from a compassionate and loving heart; an outpouring of what you feel inside. If you have attachment issues, this can be a thorn in your side. You may find you have resistance toward being kind because you feel owed by someone, or maybe you feel empty and need them to fill you up. That powerlessness makes finding kindness inside you nearly impossible because you’re so focused on filling the empty space. Grasping for control takes precedence, causing you to focus on what’s missing instead of being grateful for what you have.

It’s a bit of a loop because practicing genuine kindness can help us become less attached. It can guide us beyond our self-made walls rather than hiding behind them. Join me to learn how ditching expectations can clear a path for genuine kindness and compassion to flow. Not only will those around you appreciate it, you’ll be a happier human.

Kindness and expectations—well there’s an oxymoron! How can you be authentically kind while having certain expectations? If I’m acting in a certain way so someone gives me what I want (some call it being “nice”), that’s built on expectations. Wanting something in return for your kindness does not stem from a place of generosity.

Kindness comes from a compassionate and loving heart; an outpouring of what you feel inside. If you have attachment issues, this can be a thorn in your side. You may find you have resistance toward being kind because you feel owed by someone, or maybe you feel empty and need them to fill you up. That powerlessness makes finding kindness inside you nearly impossible because you’re so focused on filling the empty space. Grasping for control takes precedence, causing you to focus on what’s missing instead of being grateful for what you have.

It’s a bit of a loop because practicing genuine kindness can help us become less attached. It can guide us beyond our self-made walls rather than hiding behind them. Join me to learn how ditching expectations can clear a path for genuine kindness and compassion to flow. Not only will those around you appreciate it, you’ll be a happier human.

Most of my clients have some form of insecure attachment (hence my podcast series dedicated to it!). Whether anxious, avoidant or a combination of both, getting to a place of non-attachment is a major undertaking. When starting down the path, it can feel downright impossible to detach from what someone else does or says… and to achieve an inner feeling of peace. That’s because wherever you turn, you’re attached to an outcome or how you’re perceived. This stuff is insidious! Emotional freedom, peace and happiness ARE possible, but not while remaining in a state of attachment.

Let’s be clear about something: we’re not striving for perfection. We’re moving toward a state of awareness and the ability to let go. You want to get to a place where whatever everyone else does is ok because it’s not about you; you’re able to separate and not take things personally. It’s about learning to live and let live because you really DON’T have control. It’s also about taking care of your feelings… honoring whatever they are… and accepting them as part of you. When you stop grasping at the outer drama and internalizing it, an organic transition starts to happen. There is a shift in the way you respond to the outside world because it’s no longer a reflection of what’s inside. The external does not define you. It’s a hell of a road toward non-attachment, but the freedom, love and happiness that await are so completely worth it.

Most of my clients have some form of insecure attachment (hence my podcast series dedicated to it!). Whether anxious, avoidant or a combination of both, getting to a place of non-attachment is a major undertaking. When starting down the path, it can feel downright impossible to detach from what someone else does or says… and to achieve an inner feeling of peace. That’s because wherever you turn, you’re attached to an outcome or how you’re perceived. This stuff is insidious! Emotional freedom, peace and happiness ARE possible, but not while remaining in a state of attachment.

Let’s be clear about something: we’re not striving for perfection. We’re moving toward a state of awareness and the ability to let go. You want to get to a place where whatever everyone else does is ok because it’s not about you; you’re able to separate and not take things personally. It’s about learning to live and let live because you really DON’T have control. It’s also about taking care of your feelings… honoring whatever they are… and accepting them as part of you. When you stop grasping at the outer drama and internalizing it, an organic transition starts to happen. There is a shift in the way you respond to the outside world because it’s no longer a reflection of what’s inside. The external does not define you. It’s a hell of a road toward non-attachment, but the freedom, love and happiness that await are so completely worth it.

Most of my clients have some form of insecure attachment (hence my podcast series dedicated to it!). Whether anxious, avoidant or a combination of both, getting to a place of non-attachment is a major undertaking. When starting down the path, it can feel downright impossible to detach from what someone else does or says… and to achieve an inner feeling of peace. That’s because wherever you turn, you’re attached to an outcome or how you’re perceived. This stuff is insidious! Emotional freedom, peace and happiness ARE possible, but not while remaining in a state of attachment.

Let’s be clear about something: we’re not striving for perfection. We’re moving toward a state of awareness and the ability to let go. You want to get to a place where whatever everyone else does is ok because it’s not about you; you’re able to separate and not take things personally. It’s about learning to live and let live because you really DON’T have control. It’s also about taking care of your feelings… honoring whatever they are… and accepting them as part of you. When you stop grasping at the outer drama and internalizing it, an organic transition starts to happen. There is a shift in the way you respond to the outside world because it’s no longer a reflection of what’s inside. The external does not define you. It’s a hell of a road toward non-attachment, but the freedom, love and happiness that await are so completely worth it.

Most of my clients have some form of insecure attachment (hence my podcast series dedicated to it!). Whether anxious, avoidant or a combination of both, getting to a place of non-attachment is a major undertaking. When starting down the path, it can feel downright impossible to detach from what someone else does or says… and to achieve an inner feeling of peace. That’s because wherever you turn, you’re attached to an outcome or how you’re perceived. This stuff is insidious! Emotional freedom, peace and happiness ARE possible, but not while remaining in a state of attachment.

Let’s be clear about something: we’re not striving for perfection. We’re moving toward a state of awareness and the ability to let go. You want to get to a place where whatever everyone else does is ok because it’s not about you; you’re able to separate and not take things personally. It’s about learning to live and let live because you really DON’T have control. It’s also about taking care of your feelings… honoring whatever they are… and accepting them as part of you. When you stop grasping at the outer drama and internalizing it, an organic transition starts to happen. There is a shift in the way you respond to the outside world because it’s no longer a reflection of what’s inside. The external does not define you. It’s a hell of a road toward non-attachment, but the freedom, love and happiness that await are so completely worth it.

The subconscious can be a sneaky sucker when it comes to insecure attachment. It may lead us to chase disappointment, which is incredibly painful, but also part of the draw because it’s what we know. Is there someone you’re seeking validation from? It may not even be someone currently in your life; it could be a new relationship that looks a lot like an old one. Your subconscious leads you to pick someone with many similar qualities in the hope that your feelings will be validated. You’re looking for a “do over” with this new person to satisfy the validation you didn’t get from the old one. So how does this tie in to disappointment? Well, the disappointment you felt with the old relationship is something your subconscious seeks to repeat because it’s familiar. But the way you stop the pattern is by jumping on the rollercoaster to finally feel your emotions and face the disappointment.

It’s important to note, however, this rollercoaster is not “just how relationships are.” Once you start to accept disappointment as inevitable, the ride starts to slow down and you realize the ups and downs are not essential to a healthy, intimate relationship. Learn how to jump on the disappointment rollercoaster to face your fears, then let it slow down and come to a complete stop.

The subconscious can be a sneaky sucker when it comes to insecure attachment. It may lead us to chase disappointment, which is incredibly painful, but also part of the draw because it’s what we know. Is there someone you’re seeking validation from? It may not even be someone currently in your life; it could be a new relationship that looks a lot like an old one. Your subconscious leads you to pick someone with many similar qualities in the hope that your feelings will be validated. You’re looking for a “do over” with this new person to satisfy the validation you didn’t get from the old one. So how does this tie in to disappointment? Well, the disappointment you felt with the old relationship is something your subconscious seeks to repeat because it’s familiar. But the way you stop the pattern is by jumping on the rollercoaster to finally feel your emotions and face the disappointment.

It’s important to note, however, this rollercoaster is not “just how relationships are.” Once you start to accept disappointment as inevitable, the ride starts to slow down and you realize the ups and downs are not essential to a healthy, intimate relationship. Learn how to jump on the disappointment rollercoaster to face your fears, then let it slow down and come to a complete stop.