Going Terribly

On the heels of a wicked Pranksgiving hangover, Doug and Alice discuss gentler, milder topics such as feng shui, American Girl Dolls, tax-free groceries, local filmmakers, and the timeless tunes of Tom Jones. 

Really?

Yeah, but no, not really.

Other discussion topics may include:

- Pent up Bible dudes

- How to summon your pet Predator

- When 32 inches is too small and when it's way too much

- Cannibalistic restaurant mascots

- Possible B&J regrets. And if that seemed dirty to you, read it again, ya perv.

Release the Piecaken! It's Thanksgiving week, and Doug and Alice have crankstaken the shenanigans up to 11. Gird your sirloins for some long and uncomfortable ASMR, as well as a biblical digression about seed-spilling. Talk about Wanksgiving, amirite?

Then tune into YouTube on Wednesday for Going Terribly's PRANKSGIVING VIDEO SPECIAL in which Doug and Alice take the best parts of Thanksgiving -- the food and the loved ones -- and add a dash of poonkin spice. Seven households (some more alike in dignity than others) face off in a Showcase Showdown with abominable concoctions at Chez Doug.

So grab a Dranksgiving and celebrate Colin Hanksgiving with the hosts who Pranksgiveth and the hosts who Prankstaketh away.

Other discussion topics may include:

- The allure of discount grocery lighting

- Onanism: The sexiest part of the Bible?

- The gravitational pull and irresistible comfort of a pet bed

- Learning how to bail out a murderer. You know, just in case.

- Dougnuts

In honor of Pranksgiving next week, Alice and Doug share their best, wholesome prank stories that may or may not involve knights, potatoes, grand larceny, douching, flaccidity, tickling, butterballs, Jean-Claude Van Damme, and fomentation of insurrection via social media.

Other discussion topics may include:

- Contact Death

- Contact Death 2: Electric Deathaloo

- Contact Death 3: Potato Storm

- Contact Death 4: Moms Gone Wild

- In retrospect, there should have been a fifth Contact Death instead of so much talking about Hanson

On November 10, 1810, George Jennings, inventor of the first flush toilet, was born.

On November 10, 2020, Alice Shen, co-host of Going Terribly, will probably wreck a flush toilet after eating a tortilla chip bedeviled with Carolina Reaper pepper, Scorpion Pepper, and Sichuan Peppercorn. Why? Cuz she's an utter abomination, and it's her birthday. That's why.

Visit Chez Doug to learn about other questionable things that happened on this day in history, and then go to our socials to catch our first video segment wherein Alice and three lucky friends undergo the Paqui #OneChipChallenge. Bring a bucket and a mop for these sweat-gas wussies.

Other discussion topics may include:

- Signing up for a joint bank account (includes exclusive pin number reveal!)

- Global Issue of the Week: Are ghost cats good or evil?

- Aimless auditions for the next William Faulkner novel

- Human Flatulence vs. Artisanal Soaps: The Final Showdown

- The Catfather, starring Purrlon Brando, Meow Pacino, and Diane Kitten

It's 90s week, and the floor is nostalgia! Alice confesses that she never finished reading Watership Down in the eighth grade, and Doug reveals that he prefers *NSYNC over Backstreet Boys. They talk picture books, past presidents, animated feature films, and that awkward Millennial stage of being intimidated by both young children and adultier adults.

And guess who's back! Maddie (Alice and Doug's hypothetical foster cow) makes a reappearance to discuss the merits of Heifer International, a real charity run by Pierre U. Ferrari (sounds fake to me...) that sponsors farm animals (including but not limited to cows, chickens, goats, and alpacas!) for needy families.

Other discussion topics may include:

-Scatological humorists and the hashtags that unite them

-Alternatively decorated burial receptacles

-How we can blame giant water bills on the government

-Bird Impressions: A Competition for the Ages

-Poop dust. Or was it poop ducts? Wait, they’re both in this episode? Unbelievable, guys.

It is a dark and stormy night. A gravelly voiced man sits by the fire, eating a peanut butter sandwich...

But not just ANY peanut butter sandwich --- a HONEY ROASTED peanut butter sandwich...

But not just ANY honey roasted peanut butter sandwich --- a SENTIENT honey roasted peanut butter sandwich...on ARTISANAL BREAD!!!

And it's screaming! THE NUTS ARE SCREAMING!!!! AAAAAHHHHH!!!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAWIOUW*!*$)#$(!@#H$@%QTY#(UHHOIU.

Alice and Doug welcome horror aficionado Kevin Roach for a bonus Halloween episode full of ghoulish games and scary surprises. The discussion includes favorite costumes, craziest phobias, and weirdest movie roles (two word spoiler: tentacle sex).

Double, Double, Boil and Trouble! Doug accidentally drinks shower water during a boil advisory. Alice nearly burns her house down while boiling a pot of water to sanitize her menstrual cup. They’re clearly not ready to manage their own Home Depot. Or murder the Scottish king, usurp the throne, and get these bloodstains out by Halloween. 

Other discussion topics may include: 

- Men, women, and their disparate associations with hoods 

- Christmas themed horror movies. With snakes. 

- How to use your phone to strengthen your pelvic floor 

- Baader-Meinhof, penis stitches, and other phenomena   

- A legitimately (no, really) honest assessment of fate and destiny

The dastardly duo contemplate getting matching tattoos after a series of unfortunate events: Doug regrets investing in artisanal beads; Alice pines after an unattainable hurdy-gurdist in Winnipeg; they welcome Josh Weiland to the poo’dcast but somehow don’t make any 3-way jokes.

There’s also legit information about the Extra Life gaming fundraiser to benefit Riley Hospital for Children. How about a tattoo commemorating 25 hours of non-stop gaming together. They’ll definitely...not want to remember that.

Other discussion topics may include:

- Pumpkin Addiction: The Unspoken Pandemic

- A thorough examination of Deep V's

- Places to find beef, including perceptive listeners

- The apparently difficult art of sandwich making

- Anne and Lisa: A Tale of Two Franks

Alice has an existential crisis and considers a career change into the audiobook narration industry. Doug can’t remember when he last hugged someone, and it’s slowly murdering him. They finally learn what gluten is. This week’s episode gets real, y’all.

Other discussion topics may include:

- An examination of very important world records, such as cucumber eating

- Vegan treats and the accidental ASMR that accompanies them

- A celebration of their millions of listeners*

- The anal retentiveness and inventiveness of the elderly

- Their first ever game, full of impressions, trivia, and one artificial orgasm

*an educated estimate

On this episode of To Outsmuck a Smucker, Doug channels his best Orson Welles and reads a diary entry from The Uncrustables -- a neo-noir adapted from a gothic novel. Alice accompanies with some questionable impressions of Crustopher Walken and Jammy Stewart. They also decide to adopt a baby cow, name her Maddie, raise her for eighteen months, then take her out for ribs. Wait. Her ribs? Or just ribs?

Other discussion topics may include: 

- Ice(landic s)cream therapy

- See-through lavatories and other provocative rooms

- Consuming food both meant for and emitting from animals

- Shower Sandwiches with Anna Kendrick

- Honestly, they really just talk about Uncrustables for, like, six hours.

[Allergy Warning: Contains gluten, dairy, eggs, and well-meaning yet ultimately misleading information about Temple Grandin]