Hello Hayes

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Thank you all for submitting such great questions on the creative process and writing. This is part 1 of my 4 part Q+A series! In today's episode, we're tackling HOW TO GET STARTED. We’re gonna talk about finding a spark, idea generation, we’re gonna talk about recognizing yourself as an artist or writer and giving yourself permission to be that person, and then we’re gonna talk about being seen by others.

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Today we're talking about discipline: how to get it and how to stop hating ourselves for not having it. This episode is for you if:

You feel like your lack of discipline is the reason you haven’t reached your potential.

You have something you desperately want to do, but can’t seem to stick with it.

You wonder why discipline seems so easy for other people — and so hard for you.

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Today we’re talking about the healing power of books — specifically 9 books (fiction and non-fiction) that have helped me heal over the past year. The first half of this episode is a rapid-fire review of eight of my favorites, and in the second half, I do a deep dive on the book I’m currently reading: THE MYTH OF NORMAL by Dr. Gabor Maté.

If you’re feeling stuck, burned out, or ready to grow emotionally, these books can support your healing journey and offer clarity, comfort, and new perspectives.

For more book recommendations and resources to support your healing, check out the Live Beyond Booklist:
https://livebeyondca.org/booklist/

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Everyone wants (and) deserves an inner circle full of people they trust, but sometimes we get in our way own while searching for them. In this episode, we're talking about the three main ways we sabotage building our inner circle, how we can begin to properly build our inner circle brick by brick, and at the end, I'm answering an advice submission from someone who feels like everyone else has tight knit friends except for them. Enjoy!

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Flaky friendships are tricky. Sometimes it’s about priorities, sometimes it’s burnout, and sometimes… it’s just poor communication. In this rapid-fire Q+A, I’m answering your questions about what it really means when friends flake — and how to tell the difference between a friendship worth saving and one that’s run its course. Thank you to everyone who submitted on Instagram! (https://www.instagram.com/afhayes)

This episode was actually recorded six months ago as a bonus I never released (I'm sorry), but it’s still relevant today. Whether you’re hurt by a friend who keeps canceling or you’re the one who flakes and feels guilty about it, there’s something here for you.

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Soooo, my husband bribed me to run a 10K for diamond earrings. That's SIX POINT FOUR MILES! But this episode isn’t really about running. It’s about love, discomfort, and doing things you’re not good at…on purpose. In this episode of Hello Hayes, we talk about why I said yes to something I hate, what it means to show interest in your partner’s world, and why it's worth stepping outside your comfort zone. Whether you're a runner or not, this one’s for anyone who’s ever avoided something just because they might fail.

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In this episode of Hello Hayes, I'm unpacking one of the most common — and surprisingly complicated — questions I get when I tell people I moved across the country: "Have you made a lot of friends?" I share why that question trips me up, how my answer has evolved after moving to a new city, and why focusing on the amount of friendships might not be the most helpful way to think about building your life. Whether you're trying to make new friends, feeling stuck socially, or rethinking what friendship even means, this episode is for you.

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In this episode, I tell you all about why Brian and I decided to adopt a dog and give you an honest recap of what the first week has been like. We dive into the wonderful parts...and the parts that are truly scaring the shit out of me.

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