Hopestream: Parenting Kids Through Addiction & Mental Health

ABOUT THE EPISODE:

At times it can be confusing for parents of teens and young adults who are misusing substances to tease apart the concept of acceptance vs. the act of accepting. In this solo episode, I help distinguish the two and give examples of why it’s so important to both accept this part of your life while at the same time keep yourself safe, healthy and sane through being clear on what you will and will not be accepting of. 

I dive into the complex paradox of balancing love and acceptance with limits and loving our kids unconditionally while setting necessary boundaries. You’ll hear a Buddhist parable that may help you reframe some of your suffering, and I share a personal story of a time when I finally got the balance right on acceptance vs. accepting.

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Episode 138 with Dina Cannizzaro
• Tara Brach website
• Pungent Boundaries, Nancy Landrum

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:

Henry Maxwell began drinking and smoking marijuana at 12 and by 17, was an IV heroin & cocaine user. Not long afterward, his experimentation expanded to nearly every scheduled drug he could find, from Xanax to amphetamines and highly unregulated substances like ‘spice’. His teen years were largely spent among serious drug users twice his age, and involved many of the traumatic experiences common in that high-risk lifestyle.

At the age of 17, Henry was hospitalized for a cocaine overdose that mimicked the symptoms of a heart attack, leaving him afraid for his own life. When an attending nurse asked if he was interested in treatment, he knew he had to say yes, or he wouldn’t make it to see his 21st birthday.

To this day, Henry has only worked in one field: addiction and recovery. He now has a BA in psychology and certifications in mediation, intervention, and addiction.  Through Maxwell Recovery Services, he has dedicated his professional life to helping families where a young person is struggling with substance misuse or addiction.

In this episode, we discuss the complexities of topics like intervention and return to use, how parents can craft longer-term strategies that look beyond daily crises, and the importance of support systems for the entire family.

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Maxwell Recovery Services website
• Man’s Search For Meaning on Amazon 

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

EPISODE DESCRIPTION:

In this episode, I offer what might feel like slightly brutal truths if you're parenting a young person who struggles with substances and mental health challenges. I emphasize the importance of self-preservation for parents, noting that while you cannot force lasting change in your child or children, you can create the best conditions to foster it. 

I discuss the "self-preservation continuum" - the balance between being fully (overly) involved in your child's recovery and maintaining personal health and sanity. I also provide practical tools you can focus on when you have no idea what to do, and highlight the destructive impact of fear when it dominates. 

EPISODE RESOURCES:

Hopestream episode 8: Don’t Let Your Child’s Addiction Kill Your Dreams and Passions

Hopestream episode 58: Four Counterintuitive Things To Do When You’re Overwhelmed By Your Child’s Substance Use or Emotional Challenges

Insight Timer meditation: Your Special Room

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:

We’re back with another episode of the ‘Cathy & Brenda Show’, and this week we tackle a topic we see recurring in our community and the parents we work with…achievement-oriented parenting. As two recovering perfectionists ourselves, Cathy and I both share examples of what it looks like to be achievement-focused when your child (or children) struggle with substances and mental health. We talk about the tendency some of us have to want everything on the outside to look a certain way, even when that’s doing damage to our kids, and how it can feel scary to apply self-compassion in fear of getting ‘weak’ or ‘soft.’

We discuss the internal battles many of us face about wishing our kids would just “get it together” and how the Invitation To Change approach can help us instead look at them with compassionate curiosity to understand their behavior instead of punishing it. We also tap into two of our favorite authors and researchers, Dr. Kristin Neff and Jessica Lahey.

If you identify as a problem solver, list-checker, task doer, results-focused person…this is your episode. We even go on a tangent or two, but promise you’ll be able to relate.

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Dr.Kristin Neff’s website
• Jessica Lahey’s website and Hopestream podcast episode #163

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

EPISODE DESCRIPTION:

It's that day, mama. The one filled with many hopes, expectations and potentially big, deep, sad feelings. Wherever you are today, if you're parenting a young person through substance misuse, addiction, and mental health problems, I see you. 

This short episode is my Mother's Day gift to you - to let you know the things you do are seen, the feelings you feel are valid, and you are beautiful and loved.

Enjoy and please be so very good to yourself today, and every day.

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:

Jen Murphy was working with a group of therapeutic outfitters when she had the idea to offer “on the grid” 4-5 day family intensives.  The program was already providing family therapy on 10-day backcountry expeditions - which can be a great option for some. But she noticed a need for families to receive the same intensive therapeutic service in a shorter timeframe, and in a more private and comfortable setting.

As a therapist, this unique model made perfect sense to her and she felt it may lead to more sustainable outcomes. After all, the work of rebuilding trust and repairing family dynamics is often uncomfortable. Why not have a physically comfortable environment to do it in?

In response to the demand, Jen created Altitude Family Coaching where she does individual and family coaching and intensives. While the family is usually based in an AirBnb or vacation home, the days are full of experiences that involve natural beauty and supportive experiential-based activities that create opportunities for healing, understanding, on-the-spot coaching and ultimately, growth.

In this episode, Jen and I discuss how family intensives work, the biggest issues her clients face, the sticky work of rebuilding trust and why “over-functioning” makes for an unhealthy family dynamic.

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Jen’s website:
• Phone and email: 970-871-1231, [email protected]

H.O.M.E. Strategies for Making Home a Success During and After Treatment - buy here

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

EPISODE DESCRIPTION:

In this intimate episode, I open up about the hard-earned wisdom I've gathered since 2013 when my son's high-risk lifestyle and substance use changed the trajectory of our family forever. I share the words I desperately needed to hear during those nights when I stared at the ceiling, shame keeping me silent and isolation feeling safer than participation. These are the gentle truths that eventually found their way to me through pain, heartbreak, celebrations, and an enormous amount of trial and error.

If you're feeling broken, scared, or wondering if you've somehow failed as a parent, this episode is my heartfelt message to you: You are not alone. From questioning every parenting decision to finding resilience when you feel most broken, I hope these reflections offer you a sense of connection and the reassurance that healing begins when we realize we never had to face this journey alone. 

Remember to be gentle with yourself today, strong, SEAL-team parent. You're doing everything you know how, and it's enough.

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:

The worst day of Barbara’s life came just before spring break of her son’s 4th grade year, which he spent in a psychiatric ward. At age 12, he began using marijuana, and the familiar cycle of problems only continued from there – multiple schools, multiple treatment programs, sleepless nights, and ostracization from many of the parents she thought were friends.

Barbara had zero experience with substance misuse or addiction, and like many parents, she was suddenly thrown into uncharted territory. The friends who stuck with her naturally talked about the positive life paths their kids were taking. Hearing about the colleges they’d been accepted to and the jobs they’d taken was difficult, and her son felt left behind by his peers as well. The constant stress eventually manifested in Barbara’s body as an autoimmune disorder, complicating her life even more.

Eventually, she came across a meditation I had recorded years earlier on Insight Timer, and from there, she discovered The Stream Community. In this family story episode, Barbara explains the power of hearing the stories of other parents going through similar experiences, her most effective mantras, and why both she and her son are now helping other parents believe that there is still hope and a path to recovery.

EPISODE RESOURCES:

InsightTimer meditation - A Gift Of Sleep For Parents Of Addicted Children

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

EPISODE DESCRIPTION:

Eight years ago a miracle happened. Today’s episode is one from the vault - originally published in 2021, which I’m resharing today in honor of my son’s eight year anniversary of starting a new life.

While it’s longer than my usual episodes, this series of story chapters allows you to drop into the ICU with me, among other places, as our family hung onto hope that my son Enzo would not be one of the statistics you read about in the news. You’ll be along for the excruciatingly long ride to the hospital, through hushed conversations with doctors, unexpected laughter with nurses and more as we spent 30+ days in some very dark places.

Lace up for a long walk or listen chapter by chapter during your busy days this week - and remember, if they are alive, there is always, always hope.

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Get in touch with Enzo Narciso, mentor with Not Therapy, email: [email protected]
• You can read the written version of this story here

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

In this snack-sized episode, I share three concepts to help parents navigate the stormy waters of having a teen or young adult child who struggles with substance misuse and mental health issues. 

I emphasize the importance of self-care and separation from external chaos to maintain emotional stability and effectively support (and not drive crazy) those closest to you. 

I share three key points: visualizing personal boundaries to keep chaos out, understanding that every storm will eventually pass, and recognizing the harm caused by neglecting self-care. There's even a little bit of woo-woo included for those willing to experiment.

Some practical tips and a personal story underscore the necessity of prioritizing your well-being for the benefit of your entire family.

00:00 Introduction: Weathering the Storm

00:39 Welcome to Hope Stream

02:14 Taking Care of Yourself

03:07 Maintaining Your Vessel's Integrity

06:38 Every Storm Runs Out of Rain

14:44 The Greatest Harm: Not Taking Care of Yourself

17:52 Conclusion and Resources

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.