PSR Podcast

How Couples Can Navigate the "Messy Middle" After Betrayal Trauma


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PSR Podcast is a listener supported outreach of Be Broken Ministries. Partner with us through giving at BeBroken.org/donate. Thank you for your support!

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In this episode, I sit down with Karla Summey, an APSATS coach and couples recovery specialist, to explore the “messy middle” couples face after sexual betrayal. Karla shares her personal and professional insights on navigating the emotional ups and downs, rebuilding trust, and redefining relationships. 

We discuss the importance of emotional regulation, transparency, and patience, emphasizing that recovery isn’t linear. Karla offers hope and practical advice for couples feeling stuck, highlighting the value of community, self-care, and taking small steps forward. It’s an honest, encouraging conversation for any couple walking this difficult road. 

To learn more about Karla and her resources, visit KarlaSummey.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:
  • The concept of "the messy middle" in recovery after sexual betrayal.
  • The emotional and relational challenges couples face during the recovery process.
  • The importance of individual and couple growth in navigating betrayal trauma.
  • The role of emotional regulation and communication in rebuilding trust.
  • Common assumptions couples have about returning to their previous relationship dynamics.
  • The significance of transparency and initiative from the betrayer in the recovery journey.
  • The non-linear nature of recovery, including setbacks and progress.
  • Strategies for emotional co-regulation and support between partners.
  • The vision for couples beyond the messy middle, focusing on security and intimacy.
  • The importance of community and shared experiences in the healing process.


More Resources:
  • Messy Middle Couple's Recovery Group
  • Online Care Groups for Wives
  • Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive for Men
Related Podcasts:
  • Early Recovery Couples Empathy Model
  • The Three Phases of Couples Recovery
  • The Recovery Process for Couples


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PSR PodcastBy Jonathan Daugherty

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