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Episode 116: How to stop yelling; When other people are offended; My mother is mean – Ask Me Anything Series

Another “Ask Me Anything” podcast where listeners send in their questions to be answered on the podcast. 

Here are the questions asked and answered this week:

Question 1:

You talk a lot about slowing down and I’m having trouble doing that. I have 3 kids under the age of 12. Probably once each day, something happens and I get really upset with them and start yelling, and once I get that out of my system, I feel better, but I also feel worse for how I acted. I think it’s a cycle I don’t know how to break, but I really want to break it. It’s my family that gets most of my anger and I don’t want to keep doing this to them. I can see that they’re afraid of me, but I literally don’t know how to stop. How do I slow down and not yell? 

 

Question 2:

I am a “tell it how it is” kind of person. I don’t sugar coat anything, I’m not trying to make anyone feel bad, but recently I had a situation where I was in charge of an event at church and I heard that some of the people I was working with were offended. Now I don’t know what to do. I don’t want people to be offended, but this is just how I am. 

 

Question 3:

My mother is so mean. She says the meanest things to me and then tells me I’m too sensitive when I get upset and tell her she’s hurt my feelings. She tells me I just need to get over it and move on. It’s gotten to the point where I think I need to limit the time I spend with her, or maybe even not see her for awhile. I just can’t take it when she gets to say whatever she wants to and then chalk it up to “This is just the way I am.” And then I feel terrible and am told there’s something wrong with me and I should stop feeling what I’m feeling. I want to have a good relationship with her, but if this keeps happening, I can’t see a future that we can keep going on this way.

 

Links mentioned in this podcast:

Breathing for Lif

Download the Free Guide:
 “The 3-Step Solution to Keeping Your Cool Around Family Holiday Drama”
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Grab your copy here: DOWNLOAD THE GUIDE

Ready to learn how to manage your emotional reactions? Calm Core is your guide:

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Tina Gosney is the Family Conflict Coach. She works with parents who have families in conflict to help them become the grounded, confident leaders their family needs.
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Tina is certified in family relationships and a trauma informed coach.
Visit tinagosney.com for more information on coaching services.