How To Survive The Classroom

You ever discover something about your teacher that made your teenage brain short-circuit? Yeah, me too. So this week, I dove headfirst into the teacher lore rabbit hole, because nothing says professional development like finding out your music teacher once chucked a desk at a kid. Oh, and remember the DARE program? Apparently, not everyone took it as seriously as I did.

We’re also unpacking some jaw-dropping listener voicemails, including one about fake TikToks that nearly cost a teacher her career and another involving a very tech-savvy middle schooler... and a VPN. Buckle up. I laughed, I cringed, I screamed internally. You will too.

Takeaways:

A mysterious student prank reveals the dark side of digital identities.

Why that one teacher still gives off “could’ve been in a biker gang” vibes.

The accidental video that made students think Andrea had a secret hip-hop past.

The story that turned one pregnancy into an emergency delivery.

Why middle schoolers and unfiltered internet access are a terrifying combination.

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Join our Book Club: www.patreon.com/thosewhocanread

Don’t Be Shy Come Say Hi: www.podcasterandrea.com

Watch on YouTube: @educatorandrea

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This week, I had a full-circle moment as a burnt-out teacher turned soccer mom… and then immediately pivoted to unpacking a story where a fourth grader threw up peace signs and declared his love for a very adult body part during writing time.

You know—balance.

We’re talking about teachers surviving without running water (again), why I physically can’t handle fairs (also again), and what to actually do when a student says something so inappropriate that your prefrontal cortex short-circuits.

Plus, I’ve got updates on my DonorsChoose shoutouts, book club chaos, and what AI tool just got sneakier inside Canva (heads up, ELA folks—you’ll want to hear this).

Takeaways:

A fourth grader makes a wildly inappropriate announcement during writing—and the class implodes.

Teachers are once again told to hold it… because there’s no water in the school.

Andrea accidentally tries to become a “fair girl” and it goes very, very wrong.

Canva's new AI tool might be quietly doing your students’ writing—ELA teachers, beware.

How Andrea’s live shows are now highlighting and funding real teachers' classroom needs.

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Join our Book Club: www.patreon.com/thosewhocanread

Don’t Be Shy Come Say Hi: www.podcasterandrea.com

Watch on YouTube: @educatorandrea

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It’s Episode 50, and honestly… what better way to celebrate than with a voicemail about a student who threatened to poop on a teacher’s desk?

This week, I’m unpacking end-of-year exhaustion (May energy is real and it’s violent), plus the wildest school stories you sent in—including kids confessing their sex lives mid-English class and throwing Pop-Tarts in rage. We’re also talking about failing infrastructure, disappearing school funding, and how to literally show up to your state legislature and say, “Hey boo, we gotta talk.”

And if you’ve ever asked a student a simple question and immediately regretted it… welcome. You’re home.

Takeaways:

A student skipped class and promised to defecate on the teacher’s desk if she told. (Yes, really.)

Why a district told teachers to use buckets because the water was off—and how that might violate health code.

What actually happens when you show up to your state legislature to speak—and how to do it without getting immediately ignored.

A student accidentally reveals her entire relationship drama in response to “Hey, what happened to your eye?”

Andrea unpacks the AI writing tool hidden inside Canva—and what it means for your students' essays

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Join our Book Club: www.patreon.com/thosewhocanread

Don’t Be Shy Come Say Hi: www.podcasterandrea.com

Watch on YouTube: @educatorandrea

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This week, I’m talking to literal Grammy-nominated musical legend John Ondrasik—aka Five for Fighting—about education, mentorship, Costco carts, and how he’s working to put real music teachers back in underfunded schools. (Also, I tried not to ugly cry while listening to “100 Years” on loop. Mostly succeeded.)

But before we get there… we’ve got a classroom snake situation, an inappropriate dictionary moment, and a cooking class where a student shows up with a knife restriction and a no-females policy. What could go wrong?

From ED plans that make zero sense to policies that make teachers legally required to just stand there while it happens, we’re breaking down the bureaucratic circus one story at a time.

Stay for the music. Stay for the IEP trauma. Stay because someone said “bastard” in the most educational way possible.

Takeaways:

A kid calls another a bastard—and the dictionary only confirms it.

A cooking class takes a wild turn when a student shows up with a restriction against females and knives.

I talk with Five for Fighting’s John Ondrasik about his plan to restore music teachers to underfunded schools—and how he ended up supplying Costco carts.

A snake shows up in the classroom, and somehow, that’s not the wildest part of the episode.

What happens when a student’s accommodation forces teachers to cross serious ethical boundaries?

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Want more Five for Fighting:

Website: http://www.fiveforfighting.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/fiveforfightingmusic/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/fiveforfighting

Twitter: https://twitter.com/johnondrasik

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/fiveforfightingVEVO

Threads: https://www.threads.net/@fiveforfightingmusic

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Join our Book Club: www.patreon.com/thosewhocanread

Don’t Be Shy Come Say Hi: www.podcasterandrea.com

Watch on YouTube: @educatorandrea

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Teachers, you know it's gonna be a weird week when you're prepping comedy for a room full of principals—including ones you still have to work with. Am I nervous? Yes. Am I planning to open with “remember your why”? Also yes. Let chaos reign.

This week, I’m sharing my behind-the-scenes prep for the wildest PD gig of my life… plus two fire-filled fan submissions, literally. One backpack goes up in smoke, and another student brings lint specifically to start a fire during class. And no, that’s not a euphemism.

Also, I’ve got two ELA-friendly resources that won’t make you scream into the void, thoughts on classroom routines that actually work, and a major update on my teacher survival guide book (coming soon to save your first year and your mental health).

Fires. Comedy. Forced inspiration. And a dress rehearsal for getting heckled by superintendents. Let’s go.

Takeaways:

I’m performing stand-up for a room full of local principals—and yes, I plan to give them “the gift of time.”

A student lit lint on fire inside a classroom drain. And that’s not even the worst part.

Another student's backpack combusted mid-class—so naturally, he just shrugged and said “You’ll smell smoke.”

A resource that turns writing prompts into a literal game—and somehow still helps students actually write.

I’m writing a book for new teachers that starts with everything I personally screwed up. (You’re welcome.)

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Join our Book Club: www.patreon.com/thosewhocanread

Don’t Be Shy Come Say Hi: www.podcasterandrea.com

Watch on YouTube: @educatorandrea

A Human Content Production

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The tornado didn’t get us, but this week’s episode might.

After surviving Midwest storm warnings and Shrek-related trauma from a former student with a decade-long vendetta, I’m back with a full breakdown of things you can’t predict in teaching—like a kid gasping for air mid-presentation, or another casually announcing their itchy situation mid-kickball.

We’re talking magic tricks that turn into emotional damage, AI that actually helps (seriously), and the question that won’t leave me alone: should we be forcing students to present in front of the class… even if they stop breathing?

Plus: teacher confessions, wild voicemails, a PE teacher who deserves a raise, and my brain slowly unraveling over Kansas geography.

Takeaways:

A student literally stops breathing in the middle of a class presentation—and that’s not even the wildest part.

The return of the Shrek kid. Yes, he found me again. And yes, he’s still doing magic.

A third grader makes an unforgettable anatomy announcement in the middle of kickball.

I found an AI tool that might actually save you time and sanity in the classroom (and I tested it).

Should we still be making students present in front of their classmates, or is it time for a better way?

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Join our Book Club: www.patreon.com/thosewhocanread

Don’t Be Shy Come Say Hi: www.podcasterandrea.com

Watch on YouTube: @educatorandrea

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What do a lead-painted door, a rubberized body part in a middle school backpack, and the KKK showing up to a school in the ‘80s have in common? Absolutely nothing—except they’re all packed into this episode.

Today, I’m kicking things off solo with chaotic home improvement updates (including which stripper works hardest) and a couple of voice memos from listeners that are… honestly, you just have to hear them to believe them. One will have you gasping, the other might make you text your admin “hazard pay?”

Then, I sit down with the brilliant Charles Fournier—creator of the hit podcast Those Who Can’t Teach Anymore—to talk about why his show is haunting the top podcast charts, how he captured an entire year of real teacher audio diaries, and why his new season might wreck you (in the best way).

If you’ve ever wanted to throw your backpack out a window, doubt your life choices mid-project, or just feel wildly validated in this teaching life—you’re in the right place.

Takeaways:

I tried to fix a door and accidentally launched a home reno nightmare featuring citrus strippers and maybe lead poisoning.

A student brought something to class that no one—NO ONE—was emotionally prepared for.

What happens when you realize your friend's dad is leading a hate rally outside your school?

Charles Fournier returns with raw teacher audio journals and a season that might just gut-punch you into catharsis.

I’m begging you—send me your wildest confiscation stories. Because we might need a dedicated episode.

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Join our Book Club: www.patreon.com/thosewhocanread

Don’t Be Shy Come Say Hi: www.podcasterandrea.com

Watch on YouTube: @educatorandrea

A Human Content Production

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So, we changed the name. Welcome to How To Survive the Classroom—you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be.

In this kickoff to the new era, I’m diving into two of the most unhinged teacher submissions I’ve ever heard—one involving a movie mishap that will haunt you and another featuring a hallway hair war that somehow became my own personal reality TV show.

Plus, I’m revealing the AI tool that actually doesn’t feel sketchy (teachers, I got you), bragging on some simulation drama happening at my university, and prepping for a secret meeting with superintendents that may or may not end in tears (theirs, not mine... probably).

If you’re into rogue four-year-olds, teacher gossip, resource hacks, and hearing someone say “nipple” way too many times on a podcast—hi, hello, press play.

Takeaways:

That documentary you downloaded for class? Double-check the title. Seriously.

Find out how my four-year-old gave two teachers a complex with one innocent comment.

A battle between student barbers escalates—thanks to me. And I regret nothing.

The AI tool that’s not sketchy, actually cites its sources, and might save your sanity.

What I’m going to say to a room full of superintendents (yes, I want them to cry a little).

—

Join our Book Club: www.patreon.com/thosewhocanread

Don’t Be Shy Come Say Hi: www.podcasterandrea.com

Watch on YouTube: @educatorandrea

A Human Content Production

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We’re back! No, you’re not crazy — we’ve got a new title (How to Survive the Classroom) and a new mission in life. Thanks to your feedback (and my team’s deeply concerning need for gossip), we’re kicking off Season Two with a brand new twist: real call-ins, real confessions, and real chaos from educators everywhere. This season, we’re diving into your craziest war stories, burnout moments, impossible classroom situations, and all the glorious disasters none of us ever saw coming after teacher training.

Pour yourself some coffee. Grab a helmet. And settle in.

Class is officially back in session, and it’s going to get wild!

(Oh, grow up. I meant in a SFW manner… kinda…)

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Join our Book Club: www.patreon.com/thosewhocanread

Don’t Be Shy Come Say Hi: www.podcasterandrea.com

Watch on YouTube: @educatorandrea

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This is our Season 1 finale! Come reflect on the first year of podcasting with me, where I share my gratitude for this amazing journey so far and tease what's to come for Season 2.

You can take the survey here: http://survey.podcasterandrea.com/

You can join the book club at https://www.patreon.com/thosewhocanread

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Don’t be shy come say hi: [email protected] and podcasterandrea.com

Watch on YouTube: @educatorandrea

Listen Anywhere You Podcast: Apple, Spotify, PodChaser, etc.

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A Human Content Production

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