Why are we so uncomfortable with grief?

In this episode of Top of Mind, we explore America’s fear of grief and mourning and what we lose when we rush people to “move on.” Writer Jacqueline Dooley shares how she keeps her daughter’s memory alive years after her death. Historian Brandy Schillace takes us back to Victorian mourning rituals when grief was public, visible and communal. And grief expert Lisa Athan offers clear, compassionate advice on what to say (and not say) to someone who’s lost a loved one. We’ll also hear stories of miscarriage, pet loss, and the unexpected ways people find healing when they finally let grief in.

GUESTS

Jaqueline Dooley, writer and essayist (https://jacquelinedooley.medium.com/)

Brandy Schillace, author of “Death's Summer Coat: Our Strange, Unsettled History of Mourning” (https://brandyschillace.com/deaths-summer-coat/)

E.B. Bartels, author of "Good Grief: On Loving Pets Here and Hereafter" (http://www.ebbartels.com/good-grief/)

Katie C. Reilly, writer and attorney (https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2020/jul/09/pregnant-after-miscarriage-emotional-pain)

Lisa Athan, founder of Grief Speaks (http://griefspeaks.com/index.html)

CHAPTERS

00:00 Introduction

03:25 Cultural Perspectives on Grief

11:42 The Victorian Era: Mourning Rituals and Practices

17:00 Modern Grieving

21:11 Disenfranchised Grief

22:50 Pet Grief: A Missed Opportunity for Learning

31:36 Katie Riley: A Skilled Griever

32:13 Katie's Journey with Miscarriage

35:09 Why We Should Talk About Miscarriage

38:20 How to Support Grievers

46:35 Encouraging Healthy Grieving

47:40 Self-Care During Grief

51:19 Conclusion

(This episode was originally released in September 2022)