We've been in the practice of a tool called the three gates. First shared by Rumi, he said, "At the first gate, ask yourself, “Is it true?” At the second gate ask, “Is it necessary?” At the third gate ask, “Is it kind?” If our words pass through these gates, we can be assured that we are aligned with our Highest Self."

Can I tell you, this practice is a tough one. Often we can get past the first gate, but the second and third is where Steve and I are stopped in our ego tracks and called towards greater self reflection. Sometimes our auto-pilot speech gets the better of us, but immediately we remember and remind one another of the gates. Other times, we are conscious and take what we wanted to say to each gate and either remain silent, or we look to rephrase or reword what we wanted to say.

It's giving us even greater possibility to be and speak from our authentic selves as opposed to ego chatter.

This tool is so damn good for your relationship with self, your intimate partner and children. Even when you're around friends and there's gossiping taking place, the three gates can be applied.

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