Steve and I firmly believe that what contributes to our relationship being solid and built on deep trust, is that we are not dependent on one another. We have our own unique interests and aren't keen on dragging the other person along. I love going to dance classes, Steve loves riding his motorbike for example. We are two independent individuals who love being together, doing our thing together and also, doing what we love individually, apart.

I love watching the sun set and sitting there for a while longer. When I've asked Steve to come, he's usually fidgety and ready to leave as soon as the sun sets. I could (and have) judged him, make him 'wrong for me' because of it and try and make him be present to enjoy the moment more. Or, I could realise that this is my thing, go with my two doggies, sit there and enjoy it for myself. 

He loves building giant size lego. He could ask me to sit there and join him or keep him company whilst he builds. Or, he could realise that lego is his thing and get lost in his world of building and enjoy it for himself. These are small examples, I know, but the niggles and the 'making the other' do something that is your own joy often starts small and grows.

We have our common loves like hiking, going on new adventures, seeing new parts of the world and dancing at parties or weddings. We treasure our joined loves and leave the rest to our own individual selves to enjoy.

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