In this episode of Ask Kat & Steve, we addressed a question from one of our listeners, Carole, about finding a mature man—something I know so many people can relate to. Steve shared some real gold from his dating experiences, talking about how he learned to be more intentional in how he approached dating. Early on, he realised the importance of vetting people better: asking deeper questions, jumping on a FaceTime call sooner rather than later, and paying attention to the vibe and connection right away.

But what really stood out was the clarity he brought to the process. Steve talked about setting a clear intention for the kind of energy he wanted in a partner. It wasn’t just about swiping based on looks—it was about looking deeper and trusting his intuition. That focus kept him from wasting time and energy on matches that didn’t align with what he was genuinely looking for.

For me, I shared how, for a long time, I attracted immature men—boys, really—because of where I was coming from. If I was feeling needy, I’d choose someone who reinforced that dynamic. And if I was in a hyper-independent phase, I’d attract people who might have been right, but I was closed. It wasn’t until I got more comfortable in myself—more grounded and aligned—that I started to see things more clearly. I could read the red flags, tune into my gut, and choose not to date someone if it didn’t feel right, rather than trying to force something that wasn’t there in the first place.

This conversation wasn’t just about dating tips; it was about the energy we bring to relationships and how that shapes who we attract. Whether you’re swiping on apps or meeting people in real life, it all starts with how well you know and trust yourself. That’s where the real shift happens.

EP Why she left love off her intention setting
EP Throw your relationship criteria list in the bin
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