So, in 2021 Shelby had been divorced for 5 years. She'd held a variety of different jobs within a short frame of time due to the ups and downs of her industry at the time and a variety of reorganizations and acquisitions. She wasn't truly happy in life...nor was she truly DISsatisfied. The best word to describe the way she felt was "stuck". Trinity was also stuck after just leaving a stagnant relationship.

So, one day (on a whim and in support of a good friend's school fundraiser) Shelby purchased an 8-week course at an elementary school silent auction written by Brene Brown and delivered by one of her certified partners (also a mom at the school). It felt like a great investment on her part and she thought it would help her move beyond feeling stuck. 

One of the exercises was around finding your core values. The exercise required you to look at a list of a 50 or so stated values and choose 15 that resonated with you. Then, from there the goal was to continue to narrow the list to 2 that really resonated. The values Shelby selected from that list included words like, "productivity", "accountability", "adaptability", integrity etc.

Then the facilitator took the group away from the prescribed content to help participants visualize their values in a different way. She asked the group to write one story about something in life that they had accomplished that they were proud of. This couldn't include things like marriage or children. It had to be something the individuals in the group had accomplished that made us proud.

Then she asked the group to recall a specific memory from early childhood or from our past in which they had experienced pure joy. The participants spent some time writing out these memories and then she had them read them to the group. And as the stories were read, the group was instructed to capture noticeable themes from the stories.

When the stories were done were done the facilitator and other participants to reflect back the themes THEY pulled out of the stories. You see, it is in these stories in which our TRUE values are visible. When Shelby left that session, her profound revelation was that what she truly valued were things like "community", "impact", "love/ or what Brene calls wholeheartedness".

It suddenly resonated  why she was feeling so...stuck, disconnected, so...fill in the blank...right. It was because she was living a life that was out of alignment with her core values.

Then circumstances brought Trinity and Shelby back together and Shelby started talking about this crazy fucking idea about starting a podcast. Of course, Trinity was like, bitch, I don't even know what a podcast IS...let alone listen to one! lol But, the more Shelby talked about it the more Trinity was drawn to the idea.

The goal was to try to connect with and learn from other women in midlife who were struggling to find themselves, just like us. And you know what we learned along the way?!? We learned more about ourselves. We started exploring our passions...we realized there were big and little traumas that were impacting our mindset and heartset that might be holding us back from greatness! We interviewed some pretty amazing men and women and you know what?! We started DOING the shit they suggested. Trinity started working out, having her hormones tested, reflecting on her past...I mean, she definitely didn't give in and started journaling or anything crazy like that...it will take a cold day in hell before she does that... 

But, Shelby journaled and learned so much about herself and was able to set and achieve some relevant goals and heal in so many ways from childhood traumas. 

Trinity started on a mission to find her joy. She's always been a spontaneous person who likes to try new things....so, she took a solo trip to Ireland with nothing but a backpack, used a rope swing to catapult herself off a cliff and into a lake-fully clothed. We started living LIFE.

And we both have attracted new relationships and inspired others along the way. What we realized along the way is that it is soo easy to get stuck...and STAY stuck...especially during a fucking global pandemic....BITCH! But, we realized that with the right tools and people on your side you CAN MOVE MOUNTAINS and accomplish your dreams. We started asking ourselves some pretty tough questions...Like what are the consequences if nothing changes? AND...are you willing to settle for that?

We thought...what if we could capture what we've learned on our journey so far and provide these tools and a supportive community to others who are struggling who have felt stuck, just like us.

The podcast is just ONE vehicle where we can share this relevant information out into the world and build community. What if we could actually connect women around the world to help one another. To create a safe place to share our fears, our excitements, to get advice and friendship!

So, we distilled our journey into a simple blueprint using the acronym HERO....because we feel like damn if we don't all keep waiting for someone else to be our "hero" and save our asses! but, girl...here's a secret...no one is coming to save you. We have to learn to be our OWN hero.

So, what in the hell does it mean to be your OWN hero? It means:

1. Healing the past and move beyond negative narratives.
2. Embracing change.
3. Rediscovering your passions and realigning to your values.
4. Owning the results

And, ladies, we are our own guests today! We want to share a little bit about our personal journeys and experiences along the way and at the end of this episode, we want you to ask yourself what are the consequences if nothing changes....

If you want to join us in the middle...please check out our website at dearmidlife.com. We can't wait to see you there.