Lit AF Relationships

Guilt and shame: the uninvited passengers secretly driving the bus. In today’s episode, we’re pulling back the curtain on how these emotions silently shape our actions—especially if you’re someone with insecure attachment. From overgiving and people-pleasing to taking responsibility for other people’s feelings, we unpack where guilt and shame come from, why they’re so sticky, and how to gently start loosening their grip. You’ll walk away with practical ways to poke holes in the guilt-shame narrative so you can show up more fully as yourself.

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Ever catch yourself trying to protect someone from their own emotions—like disappointment, anger, or sadness? You’re not alone. In this episode, we explore the sneaky ways many of us—especially those with fearful avoidant attachment—take on emotional responsibility that was never ours to begin with.

We break down how childhood conditioning taught us to manage other people’s feelings as a form of survival, and why that habit lingers long into adulthood. Whether you're people-pleasing, over-giving, or avoiding conflict altogether, these patterns might feel like kindness, but they come at a cost: your own emotional well-being and the other person’s ability to take ownership of their experience.

You’ll learn why trying to “protect” others from hard emotions often leads to resentment, and how choosing short-term discomfort can actually build stronger, more honest relationships.

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

This week, I’m joined by my former client David to talk about his transformation from emotionally shutdown and YouTube-binging to expressive, boundary-setting, and boxing-loving. We get real about what it’s like to live with a dismissive avoidant attachment style, how it affected his friendships and relationships, and how he slowly built a more secure sense of self—one tiny step (and one tucked-in shirt) at a time. You’ll laugh, maybe cry, and definitely relate if you’ve ever felt like the “quiet, weird one” at the party. David’s actually charming AF.

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Do you secretly believe you’re uniquely unlovable, fundamentally broken, or just too weird to be understood? Congrats, you might have Special Snowflake Syndrome™. In this spicy episode (recorded on day one of my period a.k.a. peak truth serum), I unpack how this isolating lie keeps you from the connection you crave—and why 25% of us are out here doing the exact same thing. You're not broken, you're just avoidant. Let’s fix that.

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Get ready to feel seen! In this soulful, funny, and wisdom-packed episode, Sarah reunites with Krista Williams—co-host of the Almost 30 podcast and now author of its transformational companion book. They dive deep into Saturn returns, breakups that crack you open, dating after divorce, and the wild ride of figuring out whether your intuition or your attachment style is driving the bus. Krista shares her own messy-beautiful story of growth, how she finally stopped dating avoidant men (amen!), and why knowing your soul is the ultimate relationship flex. Plus, Sarah opens up about her Saturn return engagement-detour and how she’s learning to speak with more love—one tough conversation at a time. Come for the truth bombs, stay for the river of love.

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Asking for help can feel like weakness—but what if it’s actually a sign of strength? In this short episode, I get real about the shame and insecurity that bubbled up from a real life example from a client that needed help with a clothes dryer (yes, really). I walk through the wound thoughts, the emotions they triggered, and the powerful reframe that helped her see her courage and resourcefulness instead. If asking for help makes you squirm, this one’s for you.

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Lit AF Relationships podcast is your resource for creating healthy relationships full of love, trust, safety, and respect. 

Want to fight less and connect more in your relationship? This episode dives into the secret sauce of better communication: validation.

It’s the #1 skill I teach couples, and for good reason—most of us skip it completely. When your partner feels seen and heard, defensiveness drops and connection rises.

I’m sharing why validation is so hard (hello, nervous system), how to do it without faking it, and a few simple tips you can try today to shift the dynamic.

Spoiler: fighting better isn’t about avoiding conflict—it’s about showing up like you’re on the same team.

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

We made it to 200 episodes, and we’re celebrating with a twist — it’s an Ask Me Anything attachment style episode! 🎤✨ Sarah hands over the mic (well, kind of) to guest host and client Molly McGuire, who asks allll the juicy questions about attachment styles, dating, online ghosting, anxious pet parenting, and the wild ride of personal growth.

From Sarah’s earliest manifestation goals (hello, $6M TV host dreams) to the real-deal transformation that came from healing her attachment style, we dive into the myths, patterns, and hard truths about what it takes to become securely attached — and why it’s never about being perfect.

Expect laughs, real talk, and the kind of emotional honesty that makes you feel seen. Plus: Can your dog help you become securely attached? (Spoiler: yes. And his name might be Drake.)

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

In this deeply personal episode, I’m sharing something super fresh: I was just diagnosed with ADHD this week. Yep, it’s official—and I’m still very much in the thick of processing it all. Join me as I talk about how I got the diagnosis, what it’s bringing up in my marriage (yep, we’re a double ADHD couple!), and how it’s reshaping how I see myself, my past, and my parenting.

From the messy car-packing fights to the guilt of passing traits onto my kid, I’m unpacking it all—raw, unfiltered, and with a lot of heart. I’m also sharing how healing my attachment style gave me a head start on understanding ADHD, and why sensitivity and distractibility might just be superpowers.

If you’ve ever wondered how ADHD shows up in adult relationships—or if you're just looking for real talk about neurodivergence, emotional growth, and love—this one’s for you.

👉 Plus, don’t miss the free worksheet I created to help you feel your emotions—a foundational skill for both ADHD and secure attachment. Get it at sarahcohan.com/emotions

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Who would you be with secure attachment? Would life be a fairytale? Drama-free? Maybe… boring? 😅 In this episode, we unpack the myths we tell ourselves about becoming secure—like needing a whole new friend group or quitting your job. (Spoiler: You might get to keep more than you think.) Tune in to explore what secure attachment really looks like—yep, even the messy parts—and how it might surprise you.

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform