Making Polyamory Work

Libby names the 10th relationship of a modern marriage: Food.

Libby talks about the costs of operating your time, energy, and attention at full capacity by default, and why it's worth considering intentionally having more downtime to recharge and also so that you have some room to push if there's a need or crisis.

Happiness is Other People: https://www.nytimes.com/2017/10/27/opinion/sunday/happiness-is-other-people.html 

One Secret to Happiness: Relationships: https://www.thestatesman.com/lifestyle/75-year-harvard-study-1-scientific-secret-happiness-1503068121.html 

Why Your Brain Needs More Downtime: https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/mental-downtime/ 

Fuck your Dig Deep Button: https://www.instagram.com/tv/CcibA5bFq0D/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

Did you know that marriage as conventionally practiced in the 21st century (in a lot of the world at least) is actually like... 9 different relationships. In this episode, Libby explains those 9 relationships, and how what marriage is trying to do is pack a whole village into one other person. She asks the question, what could we do instead that might work better?

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SHOW LINKS

Marriage, a History, by Stephanie Coontz: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/291184/marriage-a-history-by-stephanie-coontz/

The Relational Nonmonogamy Circle: https://libbysinback.com/rnmc

How empowered are you in your relationships? Have you stopped to notice where you might be disempowered... or too empowered? In this episode, Libby talks about power dynamics and how important it is to name them if you want to have relationally-empowered partnerships.

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Libby is presenting at Southwest Lovefest Virtual Con April 24th! https://www.swlovefest.com/virtualcon22

Want help creating empowered relationships? Check out the Relational Nonmonogamy Circle. Next cohort starts April 25. https://libbysinback.com/rnmc/

Do you know what drop is? In this episode, Libby explains drop, what it is, why it's rough, and what you can do to make it a little easier to deal with.

The relationship veto is a controversial topic in polyamory circles. Libby talks about what vetoes are, how they can happen without being called a veto, and how they aren't always a bad thing.

"Intent doesn't matter." That statement has cropped up in multiple conversations online and in person over the years. In this epsiode, Libby shares why that simply isn't true, at least not when it comes to a valued relationship.

In this episode, Libby speaks to parents of adult polyamorous children who may be having a hard time with the idea.

SHOW LINKS: 

It's Called Polyamory: https://thorntreepress.com/its-called-polyamory/

When Someone You Love is Polyamorous: https://thorntreepress.com/when-someone-you-love-is-polyamorous/

The Coffee Break Primer on Polyamory: https://adapowers.medium.com/the-coffee-break-polyamory-primer-6c64b4dc53de

This Heart Holds Many, My Life as the Nonbinary Millennial Child of a Polyamorous Family: https://thorntreepress.com/thisheartholdsmany/

The Polyamorists Next Door on Psychology Today: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-polyamorists-next-door

One of the most important things in relationship is to act with intention rather than reactivity, but if we're so busy and distracted all the time, it's really hard to slow down enough to do anything but react when we're upset. Libby invites you to ask yourself this question, "Are you checking out or checking in?" 

Show Links: 

Your Smartphone is Making you Stupid: https://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2017/08/a-sitting-phone-gathers-brain-dross/535476/ 

Proactive vs. Reactive: https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/307309 

Smartphone addiction: https://sitn.hms.harvard.edu/flash/2018/dopamine-smartphones-battle-time/

Tara Brach and RAIN: https://www.tarabrach.com/rain/

In this epsiode, Libby gives you her best tips for having awesome sexytimes with groups of 3 or more.

CN: NSFW. Mature content, including explicit mentions of sexual behaviors in this episode. So um, you may want your headphones in.