Welcome to Part 1 of our ranking of all 15 of Madonna's studio albums! The Material Girl's woeful underrepresentation on our podcast continues, as we start with the eponymous Madonna and continue through Bedtime Stories. Along the way, we explain the ranking and heatmapping processes we used, and discuss MTV imprinting, the "dust bunnies" of otherwise-solid albums, how The Immaculate Collection shifted our perceptions of Madonna's '80s output, and that time the Good Lord Himself gave Mark permission to buy a record at WalMart. Limber up those skip-button fingers and join us!

Intro and outro by David Gregory Byrne. Visit us on Patreon for more!

SHOW NOTES

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Dan Rogge is back (-ack-ack-ack-ack-ack) to help us discuss and rank William's 1979 breakthrough release, "The Stranger" -- complete with derogatory Lost In Translation references, mediocre parental reviews of jukebox musicals, coherent statements on alienation, Mrs. Dash sponcon, the sound of the Fortunoff elevator, and why Mark needed a looseleaf notebook at the gym. Grab some stale boardwalk popcorn, Virginia, because it's on!

Intro and outro by Laura Barger and Jack Baldelli. Visit us on Patreon for more!

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Don't ask us why* we decided to hurl a rock at William Joel's 1980 release, "Glass Houses" -- but we're ranking that album with the help of Ambassador To Long Island Pop Culture Dan Rogge. Along the way, we met a shark named Leyna, contemplated essential Billy-ness and Blondie cosplay, added to the list of songs Mark can't retain, and went behind the scenes of an ill-advised French mash note. Grab a "Monsieur Massapequa" tee and get your karaoke picks in; it's time for another MASTAS ranker!

*it was not the terrible news about the tour cancellation; we'd recorded well before that -- and we hope he's better soon!

Intro and outro by Laura Barger and Jack Baldelli. Visit us on Patreon for more!

SHOW NOTES

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We end the Best New Artist season where it all began for the podcast: the Grammys. We're talking today about the 67th Grammy Awards' "big 4" categories, plus a couple of wildcards -- and along the way, the American need for underdogs, nominations of encouragement, Mark's "Folkmore" playlist, Uncanny George Valley nightmares, couples skate, and a purse dog named Aristotle. Grab an electric clarinet and join us! (Throw the clarinet in the garbage first. THEN join us.)

Intro and outro by David Gregory Byrne; for more information, visit patreon.com/mastas.

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It's the Best New Artist Breakdown season finale, featuring a MASTAS greatest-hits line-up, the return of sprung rhythm, grand unifying complaints about breakthrough categories, Elt Zeppelin, and how to evolve past Wolfman Jack in pop-music discovery. Do we agree with the Grammys' most recent BNA choices? Have we decided how to tackle the 2025 nominees? Should jerks win awards? Come spook the Recording Academy herd with us!

Intro and outro by Laura Barger and Jack Baldelli; for more information/to become a patron of the show, visit patreon.com/mastas.

SHOW NOTES

Single 19: Favorite Discoveries on NPR's Women+ Song List

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Our penultimate Best New Artist Breakdown moves into the teens; we're talking about Amy Clonehouses, lost anthems of lady rage, gold-watch nominations, the Overton window of band-name ludicrosity, and much more. Grab those Kendrick Lamar seminar syllabi and have a listen!

Intro and outro by Andrew Byrne; for more information/to become a patron of the show, visit patreon.com/mastas.

SHOW NOTES

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As the Best New Artist Breakdown season rounds the millennium turn, we're talking about which band is playing when Jennifer Love Hewitt flees a serial killer, artists we should like on paper but fall asleep to in practice, the music of shampoo ads, and the basic room in each of our hearts. If Kanye West will make room, join us on the line between genius and madness for our latest episode!

Intro and outro by David Gregory Byrne; for more information/to become a patron of the show, visit patreon.com/mastas.

SHOW NOTES

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We're closing out the twentieth century in our fifth episode, and there are fewer howling embarrassments among our Best New Artist winners this time...but just as much anal-retentive insanity in our prep, plus diversity of sound, nothingburger arrangements saved by a Braxton, convincing Patsy Cline drag, effortful album titles, and the memory-holing of a multi-platinum act. Your dinner-party table in hell is ready, so pull up a chair and listen!

Intro and outro by David Gregory Byrne; for more information/to become a patron of the show, visit patreon.com/mastas.

SHOW NOTES

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Confusing band names, the MTV aura, and what happens if the comedy/tragedy masks and a keyboard mate: it's the 4th episode of our Best New Artist season, which brings us great winners, indefensible losers, and tracks that are more branding exercise than song. Does Mariah tie a whole Reagan-era room together? Listen now and find out!

Intro and outro by Andrew Byrne; for more information/to become a patron of the show, visit patreon.com/mastas.

SHOW NOTES

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Disco, NuRo, and not knowing where to look during "Afternoon Delight" -- it's all part of our third episode, when we're also talking about Starman's dinner party, the mayonnaise filter, the Michael McDonald industrial complex, and Mark's request to dump all the geography-named bands into one planetary supergroup. There's only one way to lift the Best New Artist curse, and that's to listen now.

Intro and outro by Laura Barger and Jack Baldelli. For more information/to become a patron of the show, visit patreon.com/mastas.

SHOW NOTES

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