The Art of Charm

Master Elite Human Dynamics: Lessons from Green Beret Nick Lavery


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In today’s episode, we cover what it takes to be a Green Beret with Nick Lavery. Nick is an active duty member of the United States Army Special Forces. On his 2nd combat rotation to Afghanistan 10 years ago, he and his detachment fell victim to an insider attack that led to Nick losing his leg. Refusing a military medical retirement, Nick set his sights on returning to operational status. Nick is considered the 1st special forces operator to return to combat as an above-the-knee amputee. Lastly, he's the author of the book Objective Secure: The Battle-Tested Guide to Goal Achievement.


The Green Berets are the elite special forces of the U.S. Army, but what separates the elite from the rest, why is relationship building critical to the Green Beret’s mission success, and what does it take to rapidly build trust and camaraderie with people across different cultures and language barriers?


What to Listen For
  • Introduction – 0:00
  • Why did Nick Lavery enlist in the Army Special Forces? 

    • Most people never enlist this way – 11:30
    • What separates the Green Berets from other special operations forces in the military?
    • How do elite special forces learn to rapidly develop trust with people across different cultures and language barriers?  

      • The military secret to building unbreakable teams – 23:26
      • What do elite special forces do to forge bonds among teams to ensure mission success in life or death situations?

        • The only Green Beret to return to active duty without a leg – 27:27
        • How did Nick Lavery lose a leg and return to active duty as the only Green Beret with an above-knee amputation?

          • The moment he rejoined his band of brothers – 46:15
          • What was it like for Nick to finally rejoin his team of Green Berets?
          • The 3 reasons soldiers crave the chaos of war when they’re away from the battlefield

            • The key to building relationships that most people overlook – 1:01:30
            • What do most people not do when they’re trying to build new relationships?
            • How do you crush self-doubt like the elite special forces?

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